Calling all "only childs"/single children!!!

[gigglebox]

Are you glad you're an only child or did you ever wish you had a sibling?

 

[gigglebox]

Really? No one?

I just need to know I'm doing the right thing by giving my only child a sibling. I had two siblings and loved it, so just wondering how being an only is...

 

[Kirsty3051]

My husband is an only child and loved it, but he wants our son to have at least 2 siblings. Go figure

 

[Lucy139]

I have only one child thought that's what I wanted until now.....I think how much I love my siblings and think I want him to have a sibling! X

 

[justplay91]

Both my husband and best friend are only children. They both wish they'd had siblings growing up and now. I had a younger brother and enjoyed the bond as a child but we aren't super close anymore (but he's quite different and doesn't really like me now that I have a family). I definitely am glad I had a sibling, though. I was never alone as a kid and basically had a built in play mate all the time!

 

[kellyc1987]

I'm an only child but had 3 very close cousins who I saw every day but I still always hoped for a sibling.. I remember even wishing my mum would find a baby on the street and we'd be able to keep it lol

 

[gigglebox]

Awww thanks everyone

Lucy how old is your child? We were in the "one and done" boat until recently.

Kelly that is kind of sad! That's nice you had cousins though. We recently moved away from my family, but even so my son was the only grandchild on both sides until this past January, and that cousin live across the country! We have another family member due in November but she is two hours away, and they're talking about moving several states away sooo......a playmate in the house would be good haha

 

[staralfur]

I have always wished I had a sibling.

That said, there are definitely positives to being an only child, too.

I've always said I wanted 2 kids and that it was non-negotiable because of how strongly I remember wanting a sibling growing up (and how much I wish I had one now!), but as time goes on I'm considering that maybe I do only want one. So obviously being an only child hasn't been too traumatizing if I'm considering it for my LO!

 

[LovemyBubx]

My brother has a disability so was basically a baby for a really long time & never played properly (and I was 6 when he was born) so I was always by myself I have always loved him but always wished there was just 1 more sibling for me to always have.
Even as a adult, I will never be a auntie (OH isn't in touch with his family) & DD won't see any first cousins.

 

[mummyruston]

Only child here. Eldest on both sides of the family to Lots of cousins but always longed for siblings.

Holidays were a little lonely and I always felt that after playing with friends, they went home to a family of children and laughter and I didn't.
Don't get me wrong, it's made me very sociable and I make friends easy and I don't find moving jobs difficult or anything like that.

I remember always having the best barbie, best bike first but nobody to really play with. My close friends now who have sisters still have something I long for: it's a closeness, a bond that does go beyond friendships even though my close friends ive known for 15y etc it's not the same.

One of the big reasons I didn't want my daughter to be an only child. I love her to bits and she completes me - I don't need to consistently have babies etc and love every stage so far of my 3.5yo. But I'm now moments / days away from giving birth to our second child who is not just a gift to my partner and I but to my daughter too.

That's MY experience though....

 

[MindUtopia]

I think this is one of those things that so, so depends on context and your family situation. I am an only child and I loved it and it was absolute best choice for my family situation. My parents marriage was rocky pretty much from when I was born (my dad really didn't like being a parent and wasn't a very good one). Bringing another child into that situation would have meant a lot more chaos and struggle for my mum, including the expense of trying to raise two children on her own when they did eventually divorce (as she had no help from my dad). In that case, it really was the best thing that I was an only child and I had a much better, easier, more stable life as a result. I got to go to good schools we couldn't have afforded if I'd had a sibling. We got to travel. I got to do activities and sports I couldn't have done if mum had had to pay for two of us to do it. I never felt lonely or missed having a sibling at all. The only benefit I can see now is that I think it would be nice to have a sibling simply to have a closer connection to my family. I'm not super close to my mum and I have no other blood family in my life besides my daughter, so if I had a sibling (and we got along!), it would be nice to have someone else who was technically family in my life. But I think it's one of those things that you never know how things would have been different if things weren't the way they were. Who knows? You just can't guess these things.

Despite being an only child, we do plan to have two children, but for purely selfish reasons. It's less about them having a sibling as it is us wanting to have two. I'd like the experience of doing it all again now that I feel a lot more confident as a parent than I did the first time. Also, as depressing as it sounds, I had a best friend growing up (who was like a sister to me) who died suddenly from meningitis at 18. She was an only child. So her parents lost their only child, their only chance for grandchildren, the only person who would be responsible for caring for them when they got older. That terrifies me and makes me really sad for them. I don't want to be in that situation and know I'll grow old with no grown children, and as morbid as it sounds, it's definitely filtered into our decision to have more than one.

 

[LoraLoo]

I'm not an only child as I have an older sister but she had already flown the nest by the time I arrived so I was brought up as an only child, just me and Mum.
I did feel lonely at times and probably relied heavily on friends. If they weren't playing out I didn't have anyone.
It's why I wanted a big family of my own, so that they'll always have each other x

 

[LaBamba]

I'm not going to lie - I hate being an only child - absolutely hate it
Was lonely as a child, resented my parents when I was young and promised myself never ever to have only one

My dad had nothing to do with me so when my mum passes I'll have no immediate family and that makes me feel very sad

My daughter is extremely high needs (2.5y) and I seriously could have made her an only child because the thought of another baby like her scares me, no, terrifies me but she will have at least one sibling x

 

[gigglebox]

Thank you for your honesty and I can almost guarantee the second will be easier...that always seems to be how it goes with the high need babies. My friend's first is 3.5 now, super clingy, and had colick as a baby. She said the baby screamed for 16 hours a day. She had a sexond daughter 4 months ago and she's the cuddly little boob nonster that is super laid back.

 

[LoveCakes]

I have a brother who is 7 years younger so was an only child for a bit. My 2 cousins are similar ages and we went to school together/ were looked after together so I always had playmates. I don't remember being lonely but was delighted when I found out about him.

 

[Zeri]

My DD was an only child up to 5 years old. I'm sure if I had asked her how her life was as an only child, she would've said she was happy, fine etc. Sometimes she would ask for a sibling, but most times she seemed content. Anyway, I had her baby brother last year and it's clear that it's brought sooo much joy and excitement to her life....it seems immeasurable! She loves him so much...always wants to hold and play with him, misses him when he's at daycare, etc. I think her life has been enriched a lot since having him, so I'm really happy that we had another.

I had two brothers growing up and I think my childhood was enriched by having siblings too. We used to do everything together - ride bikes, make cars and treehouses, explore, watch cartoons on Saturday mornings....I don't think it would've been as much fun if it was only me. :-/ Now that we're older, it's still great to have that sibling support, especially in dealing with family issues that come up.

 

[ChocolateC]

I'd like my DD to have a sibling but I had a brother 6 yrs older and we didn't hang out much growing up. Too far apart in age to play, and different personalities. I was much closer to my friends than to him. Tbh I was happy when he left the house and I had my parents all to myself. So I think it goes both ways. I was jealous of kids who were close to their siblings.