Can the pregnant people around me stop complaining?!?!?!?

[PR&TR13]

Ok don't get me wrong I'm super EXCITED and happy about the people around me that are getting pregnant but could you please stop complaining!!!!! Oh I feel fat, oh I'm tired, oh I'm dizzy, oh I'm nausous!!!! I would give anything to feel these things! And you know I would so why, why are you complaining to me?!?!?!? AHRRRRR!!!!!

So other than that I find out this weekend that my ex-sister in law who only has one overary is pregnant!!!! Again I'm happy for them but >)

I don't want to offend anyone but I truely am happy for the people around me. It's just so hard when some of them even know that you're having trouble and still talk to you and say really stupid things!

 

[ReillyM]

Oh I So Know What U Mean Hun I Have A Few Friends On Facebook That Do Nothing But Complain And All I Want To Say To Them Is "You Don't Know How Lucky You Are"


Jay xx

 

[vicks78]

I know exactly what you mean, I even turned round to one and said "i'll swap with you if you like" and they didn't know what to say. I shouldn't have said that but it just came out!! I even had one friend moaning that she'd got pregnant and had to postpone her wedding, I walked away and had a little cry after that comment. Some people!!!

 

[PR&TR13]

Vicks, I think that it's ok to let people know those things because they can see how good they have it!!!!!

I do have a cousin that's pregnant and she also had some troubles but she is the best! She post on her FB everyday how happy and thankful she is for any type of pregnancy symthoms!!!

But then I have one of my friends who by the way I even convienced her to try to convieve because I thought it would be fun that we would be prego together got pregnant on the 2nd month of trying. Which I'm thrilled for her and she knows that. But today just pushed me over board and i don't want to offend her but she told me that her hips were big and that she didn't have any clothes to wear. I had to tell her that she should just stop complaining and start to enjoy the moment cause I would give anything to feel that way!!!!!! I then apologized.

 

[MrsF]

i hear ya!!!!! I echo most of what's been posted

you don't have anything to apologise for hun, it really should be others apologising to you!!!! One of my friends truly has been a star throughout both her pregnancies, she felt so bad that she was on her second whilst we were still trying for first. another friend, however, not quite so 'sensitive'. i've heard the "oh i'm so fat" line a million times, and that it's ok for me cos i can eat / drink / sleep when i want, etc...I end up biting my tongue.

I guess we can hold our heads up high for being strong ladies, trying to make our dreams happen. And when it does, I know we will be sensitive to others' needs, and thank our lucky stars we have finally done it. And relish every stretch mark, vomitiness and fatness the 9 months will give us
&

 

[678star-bex]

at least i know that when i eventually get pregnant i will cherish all the good and even the bad. even if i feel rough and have sickness back ache and preg brain. i will be even more thankful and appreciative that i am pregnant. after all taking 2 yrs to ttc means i do not act insensitively and ask ppl why they havent had kids yet.

 

[fingers_x'd]

Hiya - Listen it's one of the hardest things in my own experience to try my ultra hardest to not let my situation get the better of me and make me bitter. I see people on a daily basis and if I'm havin a bad time find myself judgin them to question how good a person they are and how come they've been blessed with something so special and me and my DF can't be blessed. We've been trying for almost over 3 years now and no joy :sad:

I TOTALLY appreciate your thoughts and believe that although it's exciting for people it doesn't make you feel any better considering when it's the one thing that you are craving for.

Hope you see a soon

to you xxxx

 

[MommaHutch]

I completely feel you!

 

[SpicyWolf]

Oh I am so sorry - I know how much this sucks! I have a super preggo girl in my yoga class who won't stop complaining about how she can't breathe, can't bend, can't sleep - ugh! And she tried for 2 1/2 years! I wish I could offer something to make it better but just know you aren't alone

 

[bbhopes]

right there with you on this one. I can not tolerate it. I've been pregnant before and KNOW it's hard, but come on... they know what i'm going through and they still insist on complaining to me. big hugs all round

 

[Grapejade]

I feel like some people are just insensitive by nature. My SIL is a big complainer anyways, but since she got pregnant its just constant. She's well aware we've been dealing with IF, but she goes on and on about how tired she is and how everything just smells awful all the time. It's like, I know this is real and you want to bitch about it - but don't do it to me, for gods sake!

 

[heather1621]

my goodness, my friend is pregnant rite now, due in about 4 weeks. ive already had one child, so been there done that, and now im pregnant with my 2nd, so really anything she says to me is NOT new news. we can be talking about about how blue the sky is, and out of no where, " *gasp* ugh, she keeps moving so much, ohhh it hurts so bad how shes rite under my ribs" and blah blah blah. honestly, i love her to death, but like alot of you have said, ALOT of ppl would love to be in her position. most of the time i dont even respond to her. and she hasnt even had ANY complications being pregnant! shes just complaining about everyday aches and pains you get from the experience! i CANNOT wait til she has her baby. sorry if this sounded a little harsh, but i needed to vent!!!!!

 

[ttcval]

I know what you mean I would give anything to be in the position they are and all i see is people on my fb that complain cause they cant drink anymore and one compained she had to cancel her hol as it coinsided with her due date - omg i just couldnt believe it. The other thing i hat is when someone you know has just had a baby and complains about how tired they are and how no one understands this, i feel like crying and saying do you know how much i would love to be over tired with a newborn baby of my own, they dont realise how lucky they have it at times.

 

[MoonMelody]

To be fair, some pregnancy related issues can warrant legitimate complaints. For example, my blood pressure has been extremely low throughout this pregnancy. I faint regularly, and it's nearly gotten me seriously injured a couple of times. If I express my wish to not be in danger of collapsing in public, I think anyone who would roll their eyes at me and call me ungrateful is being extremely insensitive and unfair. The same goes for women who develop hyperemesis and literally cannot keep food down. I think they have a right to complain about constant sickness.

As miraculous and wonderful as pregnancy is, not all of it is fun, and pregnant women have every right to vent here and there. Not enjoying being in constant pain does not mean a woman is ungrateful.

 

[MoonMelody]

I just want to add that I never ever complain about anything related to pregnancy to my friends battling infertility.

 

[babyhopes2010]

i know what u mean i felt the same but i when u are preg u will moan
its just what pregnant ladies do

xxx

 

[Mrs_Snape]

I tried for a long time and I used to say those things as well. "Stop whinging, I'd give ANYTHING to be in your shoes!" Now? I'm very VERY excited to be having a baby but at the same time, it IS very hard. It's not fun at all being sick all the time and having the drs classify you as having a high risk pregnancy. All the stress and anxiety... I love my baby and I love that I'm pregnant but to be completely honest with you, I don't ENJOY being pregnant and I do feel the right to complain but at the same time I also think that people should be more sensitive if they know that they are around people who are having a really tough time TTC. You need to also realise that not all women get to experience the glorious pregnancy that so many other people brag about. The only way of understanding is through experience and I'm coming from both sides here. I understand what you are saying because I've been there myself and regret being a bitch to women who could get pregnant... because I've also experienced what it feels like to not enjoy it and trust me, a lot of guilt comes with that too I guess people need to just sit back, take a breather and try to envision what it's like for the other person. Like I said, I understand both sides and I wish you all the best of luck for the future xx

 

[pinkreality]

So basically if you are hungry never complain in the same vicinity as anyone who is struggling to buy food, never complain about bills around people who have no home, etc etc

I understand that some people maybe are just flat out insensitive but just because you are TTC doesn't mean that pregnant people cannot complain about the discomforts just because someone else is worst off. It is what it is, and if that's your situation then suck it up and get over it because not everyone will be on YOUR page of TTC. I'm struggling with being homeless, pregnant and alone and yet those are MY problems not everyone else s around me so should they never complain about their OWN personalized problems that God gave them just because I'm having a worst one?

Just think about it and good luck on your journey.

 

[rosebud_01_99]

just wondering why pinkreality is posting on a long term ttc forum?????? join date march 2012 and now preggo! dont think you know much abt lttc, if all you have to do with your time is put such harsh and uncalled for posts on our forum belittling the feelings of women in very real pain then i feel sorry for you,and i wouldnt swap places with you , even tho you are preggo you are very mean spirited.

 

[rjm09]

Maybe she has ttc for a long time, just because she just joined recently doesn't mean she's limited where she can post. However,you make very valid points as to the content of her post on this thread!

It's been said already, if you're pregnant, you should at least spare the feelings to the ones who have been trying for a while. I know I have a FB friend who would be hurt if all i posted was how much the morning sickness sucked! Pregnancy symptoms are legit, and even though you were once on one side of things(wanting the baby so bad you're willing to trade places with the complainers) you should still be allowed to express how you feel.