Circumcision vs. Not

[amelia26]

I mentioned before that my son had it done for medical reasons as partt of a other operation (a cystoscopy).

He was under general anaesthetic and they gave him a caudal injection (similar to an epidural) specifically for the circumcision because extra pain relief was needed (he had 5 other cystocopies in his life and only given the caudal when having the circumcision)

Even with GA and the caudal, and the ususal post op pain relief, it looked terrible for him.
It made me cry seeing it and I felt sad every nappy change for some time.

I did feel a bit upset about him looking different down there (in the UK where intact is by far the norm), so I do understand that US mums might feel similar about an intact penis. That's not enough reason to operate though, in my opinion.

It's nice to hear rates have dropped to 50% there now. Hopefully that will reduce the number of people who have it done just because that's the norm.

 

[meg_bellamy]

I am definitely not mutilating my baby boy's penis....
I used to work in a maternity hospital and it was banned there, if you want it done here you have to get it done privately. Drs here consider it to be unnecessary unless for medical reasons. My husband is uncircumcised and doesn't think there is any negatives at all to being uncut. He will teach our son how to clean himself down there.

 

[AmandaBanana]

Just throwing it out there... They all look the same when they are hard.

My Dh is uncircumcised and I don't think that's true in all cases.
His doesn't pull back all the way wheb hard, unless i pull it back, which leads him to have more stimulation and more intense feeling when we have sex.
But for the most part they are the same

And in no way do I feel circumsized is "prettier". I like it the way it's supposed to be made. More sliding action and keeps it lubricated for the both of us without that chaffing feeling.

Although I try not to think of my possible future son doing these things ahaha.

 

[pinkpassion]

This has become a very educational discussion for me .. in the states I think it's just so common (or was) that people don't give it a second thought... I don't think anyone is ill intentioned to their children. .. but it really is becoming more and more common to not have it done and the stigma towards not having it done is fading!!! You have to remember it's what you've been taught and what you know that you generally go with!! Thanks for the info ladies

 

[spicyorange]

I know we are talking about our children here but as we are all comparing to our husbands and leaning on society/the norm ..

Just throwing it out there... They all look the same when they are hard.

I don't know that... I've honestly never seen an uncircumcised penis....not soft, not hard lol

I've never seen one that has been. Lol

 

[winterbabies3]

I am part Jewish and It needs to be done. I got both my boys done no problem but with this third baby I looked more into it and honestly it's scary and painful and disturbing. If this baby isn't a girl idk what I will do!! I have never been with a man that wasn't so idk what the difference is but I am in the US and it is very normal here!

 

[AmandaBanana]

My hubby is part Jewish and he isn't. And neither will our child.

 

[apreslaube]

Before getting pregnant, we had considered whether or not we would do it. Now that I am pregnant with a boy, it's a no-brainer. Healthier choice wins out to husband and me. Lower chance of UTI, HIV, general uncleanliness, etc. Maybe it's a US thing, but I've never met a guy who was circumcised who was mad about it or wish their parents hadn't done it. I *have* met a guy who wasn't circumcised and hated that.

 

[kneeswrites]

Before getting pregnant, we had considered whether or not we would do it. Now that I am pregnant with a boy, it's a no-brainer. Healthier choice wins out to husband and me. Lower chance of UTI, HIV, general uncleanliness, etc. Maybe it's a US thing, but I've never met a guy who was circumcised who was mad about it or wish their parents hadn't done it. I *have* met a guy who wasn't circumcised and hated that.

My husband and a friend of ours are both really bitter about being circumcised. It's actually not proven to be any healthier also or unclean. I'm really not like saying you're evil if you do it but I hate to see people make this choice based on false information.

I honestly always thought I would, here in the US it's just what we do.. I mean until really later on in life tbh I didn't even realize penises weren't made that way. /facepalm

It was only when I started to do research that I was like, why is this considered normal? Why is this okay? There is no substantial proof that it's better to be circumcised for health or sanitary reasons assuming you keep normal person hygiene standards. And to make a decision about my child's body in a way that is not life-saving or medically necessary, and especially about their genitals, just feels icky to me. I do not own my children.

I have to say I'm pretty proud of everyone for staying mostly calm/peaceful in this topic! I know how passionate people are on both sides.

 

[mybbyboo]

If your gonna catch HIV your gonna catch it circumsized or not. I'm from the us and all my boyfriends have been uncircumcised. I don't think it's unclean at all. I prefer it that way!

 

[hanni]

I have to say I'm pretty proud of everyone for staying mostly calm/peaceful in this topic! I know how passionate people are on both sides.

it's not without difficulty 😂😵

 

[loeylo]

Before getting pregnant, we had considered whether or not we would do it. Now that I am pregnant with a boy, it's a no-brainer. Healthier choice wins out to husband and me. Lower chance of UTI, HIV, general uncleanliness, etc. Maybe it's a US thing, but I've never met a guy who was circumcised who was mad about it or wish their parents hadn't done it. I *have* met a guy who wasn't circumcised and hated that.

I don't get how it would reduce risk of HIV. It reduces the risk of the male passing HIV onto his partner, but only when he already has the virus present ...

Condoms work too.

 

[mh_ccl]

This is absolutely the prerogative of the parents to choose, but if we had a boy, our choice would be not to circumcise. We are in the US.

DH is uncircumcised (and is the only man I've been with who is), so we did discuss it when pregnant with our first. As it turns out, we will only have daughters, so it's a moot point.

I will be honest that I do mentally judge friends who choose to do it, but I NEVER say it out loud. It's akin to judging their baby name choices - not what I would pick, but it wasn't my choice.

 

[LulaBug]

Personally, my opinion is that if it's not my body, then it's not my decision unless absolutely medically necessary. If my son wants to get it done when older, then that's his choice but I won't choose for him.

It will be the same if this baby is a boy.

Each parent makes their own choice so it's up to them ultimately

 

[Quartz]

DS isnt its just not done in the UK (no one I know ever has)

As a matter of interest (and I hope not to inflame) but why are men glad they are - what I mean is neither circumised or uncircumsed tend to know any different to know which is better.

 

[Mrs_Bump]

I never even considered it for ds. I've lived in the us, UK and Canada. I've never noticed any hygiene issues with uncut men and in the UK they only do it for medical reasons. I believe you have to go private if you want it done for other reasons.
I do believe it is very difficult to judge outside of your culture but also that it is best to be informed. I would personally watch a video if I was considering it.

 

[BabyJayne]

This topic used to pop up time and again when I was pregnant with my DD 6 years ago. Then it was definitely a UK\US split with the majority of US mums seeming to automatically go down that route just because it's what was usually done. From this thread (and on research I've done which shows its becoming less and less common) it seems the tide is definitely changing. I've already given my views on the subject so I obviously think that's a great change.

 

[Pielette]

My husband is circumcised (he is Jewish) but our boys are not. If they want to do that when they're older, which I highly doubt, then fine.

My husband is neither glad nor unhappy that he was circumcised, it was done before he had any memory of it. It makes no difference to him, but he wouldn't put our sons through the procedure for no discernible benefit.

For the record, I have been with two men, one circumcised and one uncircumcised. Neither man ever had any issues with hygiene! I would say that to me they looked different but it made no difference in the bedroom. So I don't see any health benefits or any benefits in sexual relationships.

 

[mrshan]

From what I read, the higher rate of UTIs reported in uncircumcised infants is due to bad medical advice in the past- pediatricians used to tell parents to push back the foreskin and wash the penis with soap. Now they realize that 1, the foreskin shouldn't be pushed back because it's meant to stay tight until near puberty. 2, introducing soap will lead to infections because that area keeps itself clean with its own bacteria, and only water is necessary.

Medical advice changes, but they sometimes still use old statistics to justify circumcision. As for the higher risk of some stds, even if that is true, it won't be a consideration until he's sexually active. If my son wants to make that decision for himself, that's up to him.

The hygiene issue... it just kinda seems like yanking out someone's teeth so that they won't have to bother with flossing or brushing. I don't have a penis, but it doesn't seem like it would be that big of a deal to wash and dry carefully.

 

[hanni]

The hygiene issue... it just kinda seems like yanking out someone's teeth so that they won't have to bother with flossing or brushing. I don't have a penis, but it doesn't seem like it would be that big of a deal to wash and dry carefully.

This! You wouldn't remove a baby's nails so they don't have to clean and care for them.

As for the risk of a UTI does that mean people are going to remove a child's tonsils and appendix as well? Just incase?

As for it "looking better" who cares? Vaginas are hardly a pretty sight, all genitals are ugly. If anyone's son ends up with someone who cares so much about it that it affects their relationship then they deserve better anyway.

As for HIV is it not a lot easier to just teach good sexual health?

I just can't see the justification for it other than when medically necessary.