Constant feeder but cannot satisfy - needing some advice/encouragement

[bubble pop]

Apologies in advance. I know I'm going to go on but I'm feeling really frustrated and really hoping someone can offer some help please....
My son is 4 weeks old now. This is number 2 so should be easier - right!? Wrong. Either that or I erased this completely from feeding dd1.

He is constantly feeding. All day everyday. Luckily he goes 2 hours between feeds at night but during the day I can only put him down for 20 mins at a time before he starts again.

I'm so frustrated as I know the latch is right, I have been to see bf counsellors, the HV, midwife even a bf specialist at the hospital. I can see and feel milk there and when I get chance to express I have managed to express 1oz from one side in 20 mins which I thought was ok. My son will often have milk still in his mouth when he's finished feeding. And there's plenty of wet nappies. I have tried switching sides and just staying on one side but he is just never satisfied.

With having a toddler to look after too, I've resorted to a few tops ups of formula here and there. I've limited this to 2oz in anyone day as I really would like to feed him myself. But after that 2oz he is so contented. It's really confusing me and tempting me to do more top ups. I really want to stick with the breastfeeding but I'm getting exhausted. Also my partner is getting frustrated as he can never hold our son because he wants to feed constantly. If he's awake, he's routing then crying. As much as I love the cuddles, I want my son to be contented. I need some words of wisdom/encouragement or any ideas what is going wrong here.
Why can't I satisfy my baby boy

 

[bubble pop]

Wow that was a long post!!!

I should just add that he is gaining weight but not a massive amount. He gained 3oz in 6 days when he was weighed yesterday. The health visitor was happy with that gain.

Thanks for reading if you're still with me at this point! :*

 

[TXJen]

I could have written this post (I think I did write a similar one a few months ago actually).

Have you seen a LC? They can weigh your baby before and after a feed to find out how much he is getting. In my case, I genuinely didn't produce enough no matter what I did, but an LC can make some recommendations on how to build your supply besides just letting your baby feed (mine would feed for HOURS at a time and still cry because he was starving and my supply still wouldn't go up).

Here are some things that I tried:
Fenugreek pills
Oatmeal
Renting a hospital grade pump
Pumping immediately after a feed
Pumping in between feeds (more often than baby feeds)
Mother's Milk Tea

How long has this been going on? It could also just be a temporary growth spurt (even a long one) and your LO building your supply.

In my case, my supply sadly never increased (I had breast surgery and I just cannot produce more as a result), and if that is the case for you... It is OKAY. I get that it isn't ideal and I would never push anyone in any direction, but I can say that son is finally thriving and happy. He still gets breast milk first EVERY time, and if he needs a top up (he doesn't every time), he gets one. I'm happier, my husband is happier, and my baby is happier... And that is what matters to me. It took me a long time to get there because I SO wanted to EBF (and my father is a doctor and my mother a nurse so the pressure to only give breast milk is immense), but I didn't have another choice.

I hope one of these suggestions works for you! Good luck!

 

[bubble pop]

Thank you so much for your reply. Sounds like we have a very similar story with regards to the struggles of meeting little ones demands.

I went to see our local bf support group and they referred me to go back to the hospital to see a bf-ing specialist - would this be the same as a LC?

I've got a pump but it's just a manual one. I looked into the hospital grade hire but sadly I don't have £90 to hire one

I'll definitely be looking into your other suggestions.
Thank you so much and well done to you for sticking with feeding! It can be quite hard to keep going can't it. Xx

 

[TXJen]

The breastfeeding specialist sounds like the same thing as a lactation consultant, so it should help to meet with her!

Good luck! No matter what, your LO will be fine.

 

[toasty6]

Stalking this post... My daughter is 8 days old and I think she has started cluster feeding since yesterday, and I already feel like I'm going crazy. My dad is also a doctor and my mom a nurse (and I am a nurse as well) so I feel pretty pressured to EBF but I know they truly wouldn't mind if I had to use formula. I just don't want to constipate her if I have to top-up too often. She's not nursing as often as 20 minutes, thank goodness--more like every 1-1.5 hours. But we had a couple really good days/nights where I had to set an alarm and wake her to eat every 3 hours. I know she's still getting used to things as she's only 8 days old, but I am feeling like I'm not supplying her enough. She has plenty of wet and dirty diapers and milk leaks out of my breasts readily when she cries and when she eats my other breast leaks constantly. So I don't truly think there's anything wrong with my supply but I still worry. I haven't consulted an LC yet since it's just been a day plus it's a holiday weekend. Just hoping this is a short phase. She's not supposed to hit a growth spurt until 2 weeks right? *sigh* just need to know I'm doing things right. She's my first baby so I'm pretty unsure of everything right now!

 

[irish_cob]

Feeding every 1-1.5 hours is totally normal toasty6, nothing in your post sounds anything to be concerned about, it sounds like you have plenty of milk.

Bubblepop - has he always done this or is it a recent thing? Up to 6 weeks is the most important period for building your supply. It's incredibly rare that you don't make enough milk, I've read figures of 1% of women, mainly due to metabolic illness or surgery. Also this could be a growth spurt. How long is he feeding for each time? My lo is a very slow feeder, I was often feeding her for 40 or 50 mins at a time, every 2 hours. She still has very long feeds at bedtime and in the night, will feed for an hour easily!

 

[leigh5tom]

Has he been checked for tongue tie? My son had one which meant although I had milk there he wasn't able to get it very easily and therefore he fed constantly (you should look at my previous posts lol!),

xxxx

 

[supertabby]

Stalking this post... My daughter is 8 days old and I think she has started cluster feeding since yesterday, and I already feel like I'm going crazy. My dad is also a doctor and my mom a nurse (and I am a nurse as well) so I feel pretty pressured to EBF but I know they truly wouldn't mind if I had to use formula. I just don't want to constipate her if I have to top-up too often. She's not nursing as often as 20 minutes, thank goodness--more like every 1-1.5 hours. But we had a couple really good days/nights where I had to set an alarm and wake her to eat every 3 hours. I know she's still getting used to things as she's only 8 days old, but I am feeling like I'm not supplying her enough. She has plenty of wet and dirty diapers and milk leaks out of my breasts readily when she cries and when she eats my other breast leaks constantly. So I don't truly think there's anything wrong with my supply but I still worry. I haven't consulted an LC yet since it's just been a day plus it's a holiday weekend. Just hoping this is a short phase. She's not supposed to hit a growth spurt until 2 weeks right? *sigh* just need to know I'm doing things right. She's my first baby so I'm pretty unsure of everything right now!

That sounds totally normal for this stage. I know it's beyond exhausting, but if you can stick with it as it really doesn't last long. Once she's settled down a bit you'll be glad you stuck with it.

 

[supertabby]

Has he been checked for tongue tie? My son had one which meant although I had milk there he wasn't able to get it very easily and therefore he fed constantly (you should look at my previous posts lol!),

xxxx

Second this as my first was a 20 min feeder for first few weeks. We supplemented with formula, had persistent thrush and it was always difficult and painful until at 3 months she went on total bf strike. I never got her back on the breast and didn't know why. In hospital she'd taken to bf so well after the birth but it quickly became incredibly hard and I never experienced pain free bf with her.

When my second was born the midwife spotted tongue tie when he was a few hours old. He had it cut the next day and bf has been great for 7 months. We didn't really know anything about tongue tie before but looking inside our daughter's mouth we suddenly knew why all the problems! I've recently signed a petition to have all babies checked for tongue tie at birth, it's really common, could massively increase bf rates if tt is treated and apart from training midwives the actual cost of doing the check is zero - it's a 2 second look in the mouth!

 

[Ashley8806]

I was having similar issues and went to visit lactation and we found lo has too high and narrow of a palate to get a proper latch and efficiently remove all the milk, hence my supply not building up to enough (hes 3.5 weeks and only got 20 ml in 45 min). Unfortunately for me there's not many options but I'm trying a shield out and using fenugreek to try. I may have to resort to e clusively pumping which stinks cuz I don't think im making enough as it is. But definitely visit lactation and see if there's an underlying issue. For me seeing them and getting answers was a big relief even though the news wasn't great. Good job trying so hard and good luck!!

 

[dairymomma]

This is what my daughter did for the first 4 weeks. I was beyond exhausted by the end of the 4th week and was in tears almost every night because she'd cluster feed for several HOURS (like 8. Seriously) and I was SO sore by the time she'd go to sleep. Then we'd be up every 3-4 hours all night long and her feeds were 1-1.5 hours long so I was up a lot. Then it suddenly got better. I don't know if it was just my supply adjusting or DD settling into a routine or if it was all the stuff I tried that helped but whatever worked, worked and I started feeling more human. I rubbed fennel essential oil on my boobs 2-3 times a day, drank LOTS of water, and pumped in between feedings. I also dabbed a drop of lavender essential oil on DD blanket every night and she started sleeping more. Now I'm having a slightly different problem though. When DD is sleeping through the night on a regular basis, I'm dropping in milk yet again. I think it's because she's going too long between feedings (last night it was 9 hours) so I'm still pumping 1-2 times a day, using fennel oil, and will be making a big old batch of lactation cookies tonight.