Deleted by OP due to privacy worries.

[Eliza_V]

Deleted by OP due to privacy worries.

 

[doggy121]

well done for keeping your cool, its more than i can do and thats why i haven't spoken to my late fathers mother in over 12 yr, she's just as controlling and manipulative (without big money involed,just bits and bobs here and there) and hates my mother who i will protect from that nastiness, i feel mean since this wiil be her first great grandson from my father but my mom comes first !

 

[NOMORENUMBERS]

yeah dh has had a tough time with some of his family, my mil and his late nan are/was absolute saints i am very lucky to have had his nana in my life and his mum and wish every day i met his grandad who we named our son after. . . all the others have issues lol its all on his dads side starting from his mum

i think you are right to keep her close but not that close, like you said she appears to have two sides, the controlling side and a really unpleasant side good for you though trying to keep your family all together, my dh did a fantastic job but some people are truely unforgiveable. i think families give up on each other too easily these days but with that said some people need to be cut lol

i just consider myself lucky that i not only have a fantastic family and that i picked the normal one out of his lol but also i can see exactly what NOT to do family arguements wise by just watching his family go for it lol

 

[Loui1001]

Yikes!!! Good for you for keeping calm and carrying on, I'd have been hiding in a corner with my hands over my ears!!!

 

[lilwelsh1]

i bet u were exhausted after her visit?! U deserve a medal for keeping her on an even keel! She sounds like the type to easily go off on one about anything. I'm pretty certain she cant get your house hun, she cant prove the money was a loan and she cant prove what money u used to buy the house so i'd relax. Good luck with it all though, wills r a complete mystery and a headache, having some problems with the MIL and a will set out by her dad (who is still alive) shes got power of attourney and is kind of taking advantage of his money! I just dont want to c my husband hurt in all this, he's the one who bothers to visit his grandad when no one else will, he talks to him everyday, he sat with him when no one else would and so on. dH isnt interested in the will, he adores his grandad who is more like a father to him but i know it upsets him when MIL goes on about the money. Its not even a huge amount but some of the stuff shes doing has to be illegal and i hope she gets found out! Anyway i can understanddifficult family members who r money orientated or too interested in private matters for their own good. Well done for not playing into her hands and giving her the satisfaction of making u feel small. She sounds rather bitter to be honest but shes your nanna and we cant choose our family.

 

[londonangel]

Oh my goodness, she sounds absolutely awful. I would probably be trying to cut my ties with her as far as possible! I would definitely speak to a solicitor re: legal stuff about your house. If all the deeds are in your name then you should be fine, but you definitely don't want to find your grandmother turfing you out because she gets a sulk on about something. You are obviously more patient than me - I don't think I'd have let her visit if she was so annoying and unreasonable!

 

[Piper84]

I didn't take her to court because I didn't want to cause a family rift for starters - the amount I received was still a very generous amount that I am SO unbelieveably grat eful for; I didn't want to rock the boat further as I am lucky enough to be in the position I am currently. Also, I was trying to find out where I stood legally (in regards to the will) but when it came back as never being released I hit a brick wall and had no other way of finding out.. This is why I want to find out what else I can do legally to see if anything was ever actually in his will specifically, just in case she tries anything? It's all been well-guarded and mixed up :S I don't want to upset my Dad (her son) if I fall out with her and refuse for her to come up here - I grew up with either side of the family at war with one another with me and my sister in the middle, with us not being allowed to talk to certain people and getting abusive comments passed through us as kids etc etc, and I do not want my child growing up in that I just want things to stay peaceful, even if it means they are somewhat strained. When everyone just minds their own business and keeps people at arms length, we do get on. x

She sounds like she enjoys the control she has over you and the little barbed remarks she thinks she can get away with.

I wouldn't be able to deal with that myself. I know it's so easy to say, but wouldn't it be better for you and your family (DH and LO) to cut off any contact to her as opposed to trying to keep others happy?

 

[bobblebot]

And you want your child to know her and have to grow up with that excuse of a woman?

Ditch the bitch! leave her to stew in her own money, money cannot buy true friends and happiness, she'll be one sad, lonely, old and bored woman when their is no-ones lives to mess with and manipulate. I'd have sold the house quietly and left without a forwarding address never to be seen again.

Just because someone is family doesn't mean you have to tolerate such shit!

 

[curly123]

Good for you both that you didn't lose your control! Although really we all should never have to put up with that!
I've moved on from the emotional blackmail that is 'family' after a LONG time of all that kind of behaviour! Makes me so angry still sometimes and then i just have to breathe deep, remember how happy I am now with my DH and move forward.
Even though I now have the attitude of 'this is our life, don't like it? don't be a part of it' it is hard to stay calm! For e.g. this morning my lil sis was telling me that our 'dad' said something ridiculous about me for not getting back to his message and that I text back like the queen...wtf???
Hilarious really considering he left me on the doorstep when i was a kid and signed me into care! (after my darling mum dying and him and his 2nd wife were torturous and vile!)
Grrr families are sooo awful sometimes - I will never be suckered back into their guilt trip ways etc...life is what you make it, not what you're tied down by!
Here's to creating our own lovely loving families our own way!!

 

[amymarx]

Oh GOD she sounds like a complete NIGHTMARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well done you for avoiding the arguments! there is no possible way I would've been able to do that!
She sounds absoloutely dreadful I feel awful that you were subjected to that for a weekend! If it was me she'd probably be in a body bag somewhere by now lol!

 

[Lauki]

Wow.. I don't think I would have anywhere near the patience you have! Jeeeeez, I would've gone nuts after 25 minutes !

The things she does with money really do seem wonky though and I think it'd be a good idea to sort out legally where you stand. As you really don't want to lose everything you own just because she's in a foul mood.

I hope you can raise your baby without much interfering from her because she doesn't seem to have a very healthy influence on people. Just make sure you don't take too much crap from her, just because she's family. I'm not saying to ditch her straight away, but if she keeps crossing the line maybe she needs a good talking too, so she realises what she's doing!

to you!

 

[MummyinJune]

Old ladies can be rude somtimes lol Sharp aswel! well done u 4 standin ur ground!! i always slip up to my OHs dad the sex of my baby and he doesnt want to no! i find it really hard lol xx

 

[Stickyplum]

i personally think this whole saga is disgusting!!! i know she is family but if the money was left to you then its yours. i have a very different relationship with my family and would not even allow them to comment on my life/child etc nor would they. I wish you every bit of luck with the baby etc and hope she stays mopstly out of it and lets you do things your own way xx

 

[victoriav]

Oh my lord. How you stayed sane during this visit I have no idea! I think the constant drip drip water torture of criticism would have taken me over the edge.

My family are all erring on the side of mental too. Do you think some people just have no self awareness or realise in any way how their behaviour impacts on other people? I know we all have our moments, but come on now.

 

[BabyBoo36]

Bloody hell! I think I'd have cut her off years ago. She doesn't deserve to have you and your LO in her life! You have more patience than I have xx