depression and suicial thoughts

[Arisa]

Has anyone else here experienced these things?
I do not intend to discuss suicide or anything of that content in detail
I merely express my feelings as a symptom of terrible depression
Major depression has hit me like a wave today, my moods have gone from to within the day!!!

It feels as though i can no longer cope with life and i have a wonderful husband so what the hell is wrong with me?

I really wish someone would reply, I do not have supportive family members and my sisters live overseas and we used to be close, I miss them terribly and get along with my husbands family better than my own except mum and dad but they are older and like their own space as they are retired.

I guess I feel like the odd one out and the weirdo in the family, despite trying to befriend my brothers and sister in law and look after their kids
Perhaps I try to hard to befriend people because they tell me I scare them when I try to befriend them

why do people want to be so cliquey? and not befriend new people? I mean in real life and online, I feel very unliked on here sorry but I think that some women here would rather I leave. I do not know what I have done wrong

its part of borderline personality disorder, I do not always know if I have offended or scared people so apologies If i have


can someone please please please answer my thread?????

 

[AbbynChloe]

Hi there - are you ok?? xxxx

 

[AbbynChloe]

I suffer from depression, I can sympathise - I literally have no one around me raising my daughter by my self, and I really struggle with keeping my moods under control.

I don't want to but think i'll be back on the anti depressants by the end of the month

 

[AbbynChloe]

Are you on any medication??

 

[Stargazer77]

Hi...... we haven't met before.....I'm Louise

Vent away...

 

[bornthiswayxo]

Hey, I'm Belle, 19 and have a long history already with depression and mental health issues.
Like the above poster said, feel free to vent x

 

[Arisa]

hey belle and louise and abby
love your avatar pic of lady gaga belle

Its just so damn difficult trying to concentrate on anything but TTC but then i fear being pregnant and miscarrying and feel exhausted right now and tired and I threw up the other day.

Yes I am on medication, Effexor actually and I will be staying on them right through my pregnancy when and if it happens

big hugs to all and thanks for responing

 

[Stargazer77]

Good luck.....good it happens for you

 

[sweetcheeks78]

Hi hon, TTC is stressful for anyone, I understand why you must be feeling alone just now.

 

[calm]

Hello sweet, I have anxiety, but i am a lot better lately due to doing ACT therapy. There are some ACT books for depression if you like reading some self-help. There is a link in my siggy if you would like some more info. Do remember that whatever thoughts are, they are thoughts, they don't dictate your actions and life however awful they seem and feel. Have you ever tried mindfulness meditation? It could help you to go for a more balanced approach, it takes time and patience but it very doable. Big hugs, really hope you start feeling a bit better soon XXX

 

[Arisa]

thank you al and thanks Calm
its difficult TTC when you are the so called "mental one" in the family
Heck since finding out i am not pregnant this month, I am barely able to step outside and just want to sleep but I can't. I ovulate on Tuesday so we can start baby dancing tonight onward if we choose but I am so tired and depressed I wonder if its all worth it?

are there any stories of hope for women on here with mental health issues who managed to not only conceive quickly or relatively quickly but now have a little baby or toddler?


its hard not being able to work full time and live overseas like my younger sisters can. I have my wonderful husband who helps look after me and he is so desperate for a child and I am really looking forward to having one as i have wanted a baby for four years but was not in a stable place or relationship and was in and out of hospital.

Basically this is as stable as i get, because I am getting regular periods which never used to happen, having regular sex which also never used to happen lol and not wanting to or planning to harm myself, I want to live and I want to be there for my husband and child and love them.

My husband works full time and I enjoy being an old fashioned cooking and cleaning lady at home, its something I did when I was flatting but its the stress and not knowing when we will actually conceive

 

[JASMAK]

I have no advice for you, except that if you do have a suicide plan, you need to seek professional help immediately. Please realize that if you do have depression, this is not your fault, and likely (espesially if you have BPD) that your thoughts on how people treat you is not a reality. I hope you do speak to a professional about these things...we can be here for you, but you needn't suffer. x x

 

[Arisa]

thank you
I am seeing a psychiatrist on a monthly basis and a clinical psychologist once week plus I am awaiting a twelve week DBT therapy course all for free through the mental health board

With help I feel things will get better

 

[JASMAK]

They will get better....so no matter what...you hang in there. x

 

[bornthiswayxo]

TTC can be very stressful for some, it's no suprise to me - I felt similar when I went through a stint of NTNP.
All I can say is, just try and relax, and good things will come. I'm classed as 'the mental one' in my family too, but it's okay. Things will look up x

 

[jubilee]

I also suffer from depression and anxiety and strongly suggest you go to your doctor and ask to see someone. ask if they have a cbt program. It has really helped me.

 

[Arisa]

I also suffer from depression and anxiety and strongly suggest you go to your doctor and ask to see someone. ask if they have a cbt program. It has really helped me.

yeah i am on the list for DBT therapy.

Feeling very depressive today and yesterday, very flat and so hungry as when my depression is high, my appetite rages and my lethargy is bad so i gain weight and get lazy. Apparently its known as Atypical depression, i wish i had the other one where i could not eat

on the plus side the sleeping is coming easy with this major bout of depression
maybe once this passes TTC will produce a ????

 

[Niki]

huge to you hun..

I hope this makes sense :/
People on here are very clicky with their own little groups. I have noticed that ans sometimes I do feel unwelcome here, I completely understand but then in another light I can see that people have been on here years and years so they will have their own little groups.. I only have made a few friends on here that I hope when we have our own children that we meet up. I tend to not be so clicky with people and be my own self cos after all its just a forum where we discuss topics..

Don't let it get to you.

We can all support eachother and dont have to be cicky

xx

 

[Niki]

BTW I'm here if you need a chat

 

[Coogee]

sorry to hear hun, im from australia and just noticed you from nzl. first i want to send a big hug to you!
sorry you hear you struggling. I know EXACTLY how you feel! I'm 23 and at my ends with depression. I'm on anti-depressants too, really I have tried almost EVERY treatment under the sun but NOTHING seems to work. just wanted to say im in the same boat as you so do you want to be friends??x