Desperately need help/advice, getting to the end of my tether...

[jessmke]

Could she be teething or have another 'physical' problem? My LO behaves like this when she's teething (hindsight as the tooth has just popped through). She is very clingy and my husband was saying it's nothing physical as she's fine when I pick her up and then cries when down again. But she just wasn't settling well.
I don't want to let her cry and it would wake the boys anyway so I just go with it and hold her when she wants. But it is very difficult as sometime she will cry in my arms And cry when she goes down. At that point I usually give calpol

I thought it might be teething so I have given her tylenol or ibuprofen for a few nights and it didn't make a difference. Although I'm sure that it is probably a contributing factor some nights. She doesn't have any teeth yet so I'm sure there are one or two ready to come through any minute now.

We've had a couple of slightly better nights, she seems to be slowly coming back to her normal self. Not so cranky during the day and sleeping for slightly longer stretches (2-3) hours in the beginning half of the night. The second half of the night she is still waking every hour or so, but things are better and I'm not feeling quite so desperate anymore. My OH has been getting up with her in the mornings when he isn't working so that I can sleep in a bit which has also been helping. I end up getting up just in time to put her down for her morning nap, so I haven't had to be "mom" until noon most days for the last little bit.

Last night she woke 3 hours after going to bed so I put her on my non-milk producing boob (trying to stimulate relactation on that side) and she fell asleep before I could switch her to the super milk boob, so I didn't actually feed her before putting her back down. She woke an hour and a half later wanting to eat but that still means she went 4 1/2 hrs between feeds which is the longest she has ever gone. Once her sleep is back on track I might try using non-milk boob to stretch out the time between night feedings a bit in an effort to get her to sleep longer stretches.

 

[Kitta_Nj]

My deepest empathies go towards you and your lack of sleep! I recall the same issues with my son, I even moved his crib into my bedroom; which as you are starting to see it can cause conflict in your intimate relationship. I too began to resent him, I spoke with the pediatrician about things I could do and to no avail nothing.
I did begin bathing him with Johnson and Johnson nighttime bath wash, brushing his hair, and trying to get some form of consistent sleep routine. I helped him learn some self-soothing techniques, and this may sound terrible, but it wasn't until he was about 3 y/o that he slept all night. The crying went away, but it was seeing my face and reassuring him to go back to sleep.

I hope things work out well for you and it sounds like you have a very supportive partner, but I understand your dilemma in that area as well!

Be encouraged that it can and does get better!