DH refuses to eat

itwillhappen

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Not sure if this is the best place to get help, but I need to start somewhere.

My husband is 51 yards old and always looked good for his age. After several years I start being concerned about his eating habits. He pretty much forgets to eat. Food is not his priority. His fine eating once a day but it's not necessary a nutritious meal.

In the last few years I managed to lose ~35lb just eating healthier and reduce sugars and carbs. My main motivation was trying to get pregnant. After a while, seeing the results, somehow he realized that it's not a bad thing. He wanted to go to the gym so I gave him for Christmas a membership that could be canceled at any time. A good transformation started and he chanced some of his eating habits for better, exercising (mainly weight lifting) and running during warm weather. He did a couple of 5k raises and he seemed to be on the right path. I was cooking at home all the time and although he didn't like quite everything I was cooking, he was making an effort to eat. He's not open minded and he doesn't like most of the vegetables. He grew up on fast food and a poor diet. Not being exposed as a young man to veggies, he simply rejects a lot of them as an adult.

After I got pregnant in fall, everything went south. He canceled his gym membership to build his own weight lifting room in the basement and he stopped using it. No more running because of the weather and he doesn't like to do it on the treadmill. He starting a new job on midnights and now even his sleep is poor. Because of complication with pregnancy and being placed on bed rest, I was no longer able to cook. So no more eating for him.

He says if he's not hungry, he'll not going to eat. More than that, we saw a dr for a different issue and the smart man told him that it's ok if he only eats once a day as long as he eats a nutritious day. So in my husband's mind, it's fine if he only eats once a day. The part with nutritious didn't matter. I mean he will eat a bowl of sugary cereals with milk and that will be his meal. Really?

I then thought that maybe after I'll give birth and start cooking again, he might get better. But I am concern that it might not be the case. Once because of the different schedule, second because he'll tell me he's not hungry. So even if I cook and he has what to eat, doesn't mean he'll eat and this scares me.

It's very hard to talk with him about this subject and I am worried for him and us. He's 51 years old and we are expecting a baby. I want him to be around for the longest possible. My philosophy is that his body will respond to the way it's fed. If you get it used with lack of nutrients, it will not "ask" you for food, but will not work properly either. If you feed it regularly, it will get use to ask for food.

I don't know if it's laziness, stubbornness, ignorance...but what can be done?
 
He sounds like he has issues with food, maybe growing up eating fast food as an a negative experience for him.
The eating once a day is actually very common in some places. I grew up in a culture that focused on one big meal at the end of the day, breakfast is plain tea or porridge, often skip lunch, no snacks and dinner is a big meal.
 

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