DH's dilemma: first ante natal class or football in the pub? Long - sorry!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by lindypops, Apr 19, 2009.

  1. lindypops

    lindypops Lin, Si and Eve

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    So. here's the dilemma:

    I have been looking in to ante natal classes.

    We have four NHS ons, on Mondays, which are in July. No probs so far.

    Except I want to go to smaller classes. I can't afford NCT ones but have found a fortnightly group that meets on Mondays :( They are local, not expensive and have an emphasis on homebirth - which I want to plan for.

    The NCT also run a monthly meeting about homebirth, with mws who have dont it and women who have experienced it to talk to. I think this is going to be vital!

    The first ante natal meeting is Monday, the homebirth group is Monday...and so is Norwich City's fight for survival in the Championships - live on Sky.

    DH has already organised a night in the puv with the lads - I was going to go to the homebirth group alone but now think I should go to the ante natal class alone. But I don't want to go alone - mw told me classes are mostly for men to learn what women already know!

    To be fair to DH, he half-heartedly offered to sack off the footy, but I didn't realise about the super-clash till this morning.

    To be fair to me, I suggested he go to the last game of the season, in Charlton, with my dad, as it is our local team and we are visiting my parents that weekend - to see my mum, who will just have had an op for breat cancer. So I think I'm being nice about it.

    What should I ask him to do?

    Sorry about the long post!!!
     
  2. joeyjo

    joeyjo Mum to 2boys, growing #3

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    I would probably ask my hubby to come along to the class but I would do a few things first.

    How many classes are there all together, is he going to miss a huge percentage of the info by missing this 1 class?
    Speak to the people that run the class, it may be that the first session is all about introductions etc.... and not actually that useful. It would be really irriatating if there wasn't that much useful stuff for him.
    Do the timings clash completely? Is there any way he could go to the second half of the match?
    If you do let him miss some or all of the class will he commit to coming to the other sessions now he knows in advance.

    Good luck working something out :hugs:
     
  3. lindypops

    lindypops Lin, Si and Eve

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    Hey Joey, thanks for the advice.

    You are so much a nicer person than me!!!

    The classes don't 'begin' as such - they are always ongoing and people join in then give birth whenever they want - so I could put this off till the next meeting and avoid any kind of clash at all.

    But now he's agreed to a homebirth I really want to find out about it and get things going, so I know how best to prepare.

    But you're right - I also don't want him to waste his time on a useless class when he could be watching his team.
     
  4. joeyjo

    joeyjo Mum to 2boys, growing #3

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    I know what you mean about wanting to get started on things!

    I think I can sympathise with your hubby because I am quite a footy fan myself and hate to miss a big game. Luckily my team tends to do well but I still like to see them win the big games! To be honest I think you and he would probably get more benefit if he went along on an evening where he was there completely willingly rather than wishing he was in the pub.... There can't be many Monday night games!

    We had to plan our holiday around the antenatal course hubby wasn't impressed! There aren't many courses in English here. I found one run by a midwife (I've actually now got to know her quite well) but it was in May when I'm away.... The next dates hadn't been published but as we have got to know each other she has organised it for when I am about 33-34weeks in June (she had planned on mid July but thought it could be late for me!) We had to wait for her dates before we could book to go away it means we only get a week not 2 weeks away but nevermind.

    Hope your Mum is doing OK by the way and that the Op goes well
     
  5. nuttymummy

    nuttymummy Well-Known Member

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    ooo lindy what a dilemma!

    sorry i cant be much use....my OH isnt into football....but then again im not into ante natal classes so this is such a useless post! but just wanna say.....even though u want to get things moving (i know what thats like!) its better to let him have his game then both go together whole heartedly to the next one?

    but seems hes willing to do either, so its upto you!
    sorry for the stupid post!!!! :rofl:

    hope u manage to get sorted.
     
  6. Pippin

    Pippin Sam and Adélie-Rose's Mum

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    He must comes to the class what if he misses a bit he really needs to know on the big day!!! You don't want to be explaining things then. x
     
  7. lindypops

    lindypops Lin, Si and Eve

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    Thanks for your input, folks - I think I'll chill out a bit and make sure he reads the websites I've bookmarked for him, then go next time with him. Going alone once isn't going to hurt me.

    I mean, it's not every season that his team turns out to be so spectacularly shit...oh hang on, it is!

    And thanks for the good wishes, Joey - mum's seeing the specialist on Tuesday to get an op date.
     

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