Dilema help (interfering inlaws grrr!!!) sorry rant.

[babytots]

My partner comes from a close knit family i.e hes close to his cousins and aunties uncles etc.

The registry office we are getting married in allows 35 people to attend the ceremony (25 of those can be seated the others will have to stand).

Anyhow as hes close to his family we sent invites to as many family members as possbile assuming the older generations of his family (nanna,gran etc) wouldn't be able to make it (they all live down south and we are up north) this brought the total up to about 40 (and thats not including our children).

We went to visit everyone for a holiday and found out that the people we thought couldn't make are going to be coming.

So theres crisis number one.

Now the interfering inlaws decided it wasn't fair that we didn't invite family that hes not as close with (i.e haven't seen in years) and put df on the spot about inviting them and he couldn't say no even more so after his dad and stepmum gave us a generous cheque to go towards paying for the wedding.

So now we have even more people coming and not enough room for them to come to the ceremony which is crisis number two as I'm sure the registry office won't let them in.

We are now having to pin our hopes on the members of his family due babies that month (his sister and 2 of his cousins) can't make it so it will bring the figures down as they will stay at home with their partners.

I'm now panicking as its unfair on us that we now have this stress to worry over.

Oh and mil took the biscuit when she moaned that we hadn't invited her brother and turned to df and said family should come before friends. Well I'm sorry but I aren't close to my family and only have my mum,2 brothers,cousin (more like my adopted little sister),auntie her partner and her son coming. In my eyes my friend are my family and I'll be damned cutting them out of celebrating my big day just to keep her happy! My friends were there for me when I lost Jessica where were these so called family members when we needed them the most.

Anyways rant over and on a more positive note as I said his dad gave us some money to go towards the wedding so we no longer need to worry about money x

 

[faun]

Is there a bigger room at the registry office you could ask to move your wedding to? At my wedding we got offered the choice of either the room for 35 guests or a larger room for 70. If not you are either going to have to tell people that due to the size of the venue you will have to cut the guest list or let people come and get turned away on the day. So soory that family are causing all this stress on your special day.

 

[lynne192]

yeah was going to say that reg office i have has a room for 30people and then another for 70-100people

 

[babytots]

I shall ask them but there doesn't appear to be any information in the wedding booklet they gave me when we gave our notice about any other rooms

Theres no way we can cut the guest list down because it will mean cutting out people I have invited and I aren't willing to do that for the sake of family members we haven't seen in god knows how many years. If they get turned away then I will just say told you so. Nothing I can do about it and i aren't going to worry over it have far more important things to think about! x

 

[lynne192]

huge hugs hun your politer than me, i would be a bitch and say everyone that i don't want thier "F**k off" lol i am terrible but we only want a small handful of people at our ceremony, i am sorry you are put in this place, maybe talk to your partner and see what you come up with? also maybe there are some family members that wont might missing the ceremony and give thier space to someone else?

 

[honeybee2]

stand your ground. Your going to hurt people by not inviting them. unfortunately i agreed to have someone i hate there because its 'ettiquete'. Now i have to see her ugly face on my wedding pictures for the rest of my life. Seriously...its your day!! xx

 

[babytots]

Thanks hun I wish I could just tell them they can't come but df was backed into a corner so we have no choice but to invite them because I have a feeling if we don't other members won't show up

if they get turned away then so be it lol. x

 

[lynne192]

hun if you say no and other people decide not to come because of this they are not worth having there.