Does anyone else feel "cheated" out of their mat leave?

[Foxybabyhg3]

I'm taking a year out and originally was going back mid August but obviously all that changed as she came 11w early, so I'm going back mid June. I just feel gutted as the first 11w was in NICU and not at home. I feel like shouting it's too soon! The good thing is I had 12 hol days rolled over on top of my annual 31days which I have to take before December. But still wish I had those first 11w at home enjoying her

 

[BabyMaybe917]

I completely agree. I ended up resigning from my job because of this. Although in the US we are only guaranteed our jobs with FMLA of 12 weeks total a year. I was on bedrest for 6 weeks prior to my little girls 14 week early appearance. My leave was obviously up at 6 weeks old. She's still in the NICU and they wanted me to come back to work. I just couldn't do it. So now I'll find a new job after she's been home for a while and I can enjoy my time with her now.

 

[Foxybabyhg3]

Aww that must've been extremely hard. I hope she'll be home soon for you to enjoy every moment

 

[Jes.shortcake]

Yeah I'm in the US too and originally I was supposed to be off for 8 weeks after I had LO bc I had a C section but my doctor released me to work at 6 weeks so I can save the other 6 weeks for when he came home. So I had to go back to work for a few weeks while he was in the NICU. It was hell. I got 6 weeks when he came home. Me and my OH really struggled with it. It just felt too soon to leave him. A couple weeks after I returned to work I was laid off. So we took it as a sign that I should be home with him longer.

 

[Foxybabyhg3]

Oh my goodness! That sounds awful having to work with LO in NICU. I actually feel really lucky I got the time that I have. & kudos to you for being strong.

 

[Cryssie]

Yes! I only get 12 weeks and she was due in February. She came 11 weeks early in November, I had h1n1 and pneumonia and was in a coma until December. She didn't get out til one day before her due date. I got out mid January. Then I had to recover. My 12 weeks ran up and I "lost" my job. I plan on going back mid May.

 

[PandaMao]

I had the exact same situation as Jes.shortcake except without the layoff. Had a csection, but only took 6 weeks off and then back to work. Worked for another 4 weeks and then she came home 1 day after her due date. I'm currently on leave and due back may 26th, but I'm taking 2 weeks vacation then to extend my leave. My original plan was to take all 12 weeks fmla and then the 2 vacation weeks when she came home, but obviously that didn't work out. Wish i didn't have to go back but we can't afford for me to be a sahm.

 

[Dinah93]

DD arrived at 28+0 but had more lung issues than expected for a baby of that gestation who had steroids, and ended up having half a lung removed. We were told to keep her out of childcare until she was at least 1 but ideally after her second winter (just after she turned 2). My work ended up making me redundant as they needed to 'provide a reliable service' and apparently my difficult pregnancy and DDs ongoing needs didn't fit the bill. On paper we were very worried we couldn't afford for me to stay home with her, but DH is working a second job that he actually loves, and we're doing fine and all much happier.

 

[sunnylove]

I work in the family business so thankfully my schedule has been very flexible. I basically became a stay-at-home mom once the baby came home though It's been GREAT!

 

[Foxybabyhg3]

Oh I envy that Sunnylove

I'm doing my Keep In Touch days every Friday and then back in July. I'd love to go part time it there's only me in the office that does what I do so it was full time or nothing. I can't afford not to work but would be perfectly comfortable at 3 days a week. I'm hoping to get #2 on board before the years out though

 

[vermeil]

Yeah I'm in the US too and originally I was supposed to be off for 8 weeks after I had LO bc I had a C section but my doctor released me to work at 6 weeks so I can save the other 6 weeks for when he came home. So I had to go back to work for a few weeks while he was in the NICU. It was hell. I got 6 weeks when he came home. Me and my OH really struggled with it. It just felt too soon to leave him. A couple weeks after I returned to work I was laid off. So we took it as a sign that I should be home with him longer.

that's just awful... So sorry you had to do that. Sounds so inhumane. If I may rant a bit, for one of the richest countries in the world the US treats its citizens like crap sometimes. Here in Canada we have a year of paid mat leave. My son was in the nicu for 4 months and I was able to delay the start of it until he came home. In between I was able to receive temporary disability because there was NO WAY IN HELL I could have worked when my son was so weak and fragile.

You are strong, glad to hear your son is doing well