Does anyone else hide from the flu with kids?!

[acrossthepond]

So, my husband is adamant that we stay away from other kids, public places, family members who work around kids or potentially sick people during flu season whenever possible, especially with our little one.

I mostly agree, we have a 15 month old and I'm expecting our second right now so we both need to stay healthy. We don't do flu shots in our house (personal choice, please no criticism, that's not what I meant for this thread to be about). We do do elderberry syrup daily and up Vit D and C intake etc.

Frankly, I'm lonely and cabin fever is creeping up on me. He just mentioned staying out of the way until March. He gets to go to work daily and have adult conversations... I don't, I gave all that up to stay home with our kids and my profession is a lonely one anyway (writing).

I suppose I was just wondering what do you all do? I feel like I see everyone else with little ones out there just living their lives and interacting like the best of 'em. Are we the only ones reacting in this way to a widespread flu season? I feel a bit like we're submitting to fear instead of living, but on the other hand I do want to be vigilant. Hmph.

Cheers girls x

 

[supertabby]

Absolutely not. And our youngest has breathing issues. We would avoid someone who actually had flu or had been directly exposed (my stepdad had it over Christmas and while my mum never caught it we didn't see either of them till they were clear). But we wouldn't just avoid public places, even without the flu shot it's a fairly rare virus (this year is first year I've known anyone in my family/close friends catch it), you wouldn't pick it up every year like the common cold, although it's obviously a lot more serious than the common cold.

We just go about our business, we'd go insane trying to avoid public places - you especially will need playgroups etc for keeping lo entertained and adult interaction for you when baby comes along. Staying indoors is a recipe for postnatal depression!

My husband had flu and couple of weeks ago, he was really sick. Myself and our 3 year old have our flu jabs every year, and baby should be covered as I still breastfeed. None of the rest of us caught it.

Make sure you're careful with upping vitamin intake if that's supplements - you can take too much, you can also get ill from dramatic increase and decrease of vitamins. There's a type of scurvy supposedly brought on by eating loads of clementines at Christmas then suddenly stopping in January!

 

[sheldonsmommy]

We don't avoid people, we can't. There's preschool, family dinners, visits with friends or trips to the park (in nicer weather). I would go insane staying in all the time. Also, people are contagious before even having symptoms, so anyone could be sick, including your husband who got it from work or something.

It seems like getting the flu is a huge fear for you guys, it may be worth reconsidering the vaccine as even if they predict the wrong strain for that year, you may still have a very subdued reaction compared to no immunity at all.

Anyway, I only mentioned the vaccine because if it can give your family the confidence or peace of mind to leave the house, it may be worth it but it's ultimately up to you

 

[JenX]

We don't avoid people or public places, though we don't really go where there will be large crowds of people close together simply because we don't enjoy that kind of thing. We avoid people who are actively ill, of course. We all had our flu shots- even if it isn't very effective it is still something, and we try our best to stay healthy by eating well, sleeping well and practicing good hygiene. I always wipe down shopping carts and we use a shopping cart cover and we wash and wipe our hands a lot. You can't stay home all the time.

 

[AngelofTroy]

Kids (and grown ups) catch things... It's part of life! I get fearing illness as I have a phobia of stomach bugs, but I would never avoid people all together for half the year just to avoid illness, that's just not practical or frankly sensible. When your kids are in school they'll catch everything going because it'll all be new to them and they won't have any immune system. Then they'll lose out on their education and if you're working by then you'll have to take time off to care for them! Go outside, meet some friends and tell your husband to suck it up and deal with the odd snotty nose!

 

[Scout]

This year, because the flu is so bad (and bc there have already been 49 pediatric deaths from flu and bc I happen to live in the city that was ranked #1 for the most flu cases) I have not had lo (20 months old) out as much as I usually do. I had planned a trip to the Creative Discovery Museum, but decided to not go. I've also not taken her to the soft play at our local mall lately. We've both had the flu shot but since it's not very effective, why chance it?? And yes, staying in is hard. I'm starting mommy and me swim classes the first of Feb and can't wait. Oh, but we do still get out for grocery shopping or what not, just trying to avoid places where there would be groups of kids getting in each others' faces a lot.

 

[pinkpolkadot]

No it would be too difficult for us I think and we would go crazy! We don't get the flu shot either so when I was pregnant we would just avoid anyone who actually had the flu and be extra good about washing hands but we still got out and about. We both work from home though so less chance of catching it from work I guess.

Now DD1 is at preschool it would be impossible to keep the bugs at bay anyway, these kids love to share their germs, we have had colds/coughs all winter but it's just par for the course I guess!

 

[MrsMcK04]

I totally understand where you are coming from and I feel like we practice a modified version of what you are doing.
I have an almost 2 year old and a baby born at thanksgiving. Given that this flu season has been particularly bad, we have been staying home a lot. I avoid obviously sick people and I also keep my son away from other places that kids can easily swap germs (jumpy places, indoor playgrounds, church nursery, etc). However, we still get out. We go to story time (sit in the corner of the crowd away from people, lol), we go grocery shopping and we go to outdoor parks and playgrounds when the weather permits. I still have to get out once a day or I would go crazy. I try to just choose the least germy places I can think of. I understand that yes people get sick, but I sure do try to at least limit exposure

 

[misspriss]

Not at all. We don't do flu shots either. I avoid people hacking up a lung or sneezing all over, but otherwise, I trust my immune system to do a decent job.

if I had a newborn, I might behave differently, but I just have a toddler now (and me pregnant), and I think we will be okay. Perhaps I am naive as I have never had the flu in 27 years, but I have made it this far...

 

[LoveCakes]

Staying it would drive me crazy! You must be so lonely.

I'd avoid soft play etc... If you are concerned but a walk in the fresh air should be ok or shops generally if no one touches your LO

In the long term though you'll have to address this fear for example you can't have your oldest missing school for months because you don't want the younger one getting sick. I'm not of the opinion you shoul actively let them get sick but it's an inevitable part of life. What is to stop your hubby bringing it home from work.

We all look to minimise the risk of our kids getting sick but you still need to live your life too and balance the risk with your mental health plus your LO who is in the house all day too

 

[MindUtopia]

Oh gosh, no, that would just be impossible. Frankly, if he is going to work, it's the same as all of you going out, so there's no need for you to be stuck at home. If he gets sick, you'll all get it anyway, so it doesn't make a difference how much you personally avoid people. Unless you've been vaccinated (and even if you have), flu is highly contagious within households. We all had it over Christmas, my husband and daughter more severely, I had a mild case with no fever (probably because I do get a flu jab every year due to my asthma). Honestly, it was miserable, but it was fine. Realistically, there are more risks to you because of being pregnant and the complications associated with getting a high fever in pregnancy, but I think in the absence of getting a flu shot, you have to trust that you're doing the right thing. If you don't believe in them, then trust that what you're doing is enough and get out there and do something. I work in the public health field and unless it's ebola or the plague, I wouldn't ever recommend that someone quarantine themselves to avoid an infection. Our bodies are made to get sick - and yes, there are potential complications, especially in pregnancy - but you can't live in fear, particularly when it probably won't do any good anyway in terms of actually avoiding the flu, especially when your husband isn't equally quarantined. My daughter brings home every virus under the sun from nursery. We've all pretty much been sick since October with either a stomach bug, cold/chest infection, and then the flu. I think with little kids you really just can't avoid it, plus it's good for their immune systems (if maybe not yours) to have those exposures anyway.

 

[jd83]

I think your DH is taking this way too far. I'll admit, I'm pretty germaphobic and avoid it whenever possible, but at the same time you can't just live in a bubble. You have to live your life, you have to get out and do things for your mental well being so you don't feel isolated, and just adopting really good hygiene practices will minimize a LOT of the risk. No, you can't avoid it 100%, there will be times that you get coughed on, or inhale droplets in the air from someone sneezing ,etc. But that's part of life, and risks involved. Its not healthy to keep yourself isolated for months on end.

I get your worries, as this year has been a REALLY bad flu year. Absolutely, avoid people you know are sick, until you are absolutely sure they are well again. Nothing wrong with that when you are fully aware if someone is sick. But don't let that stop you getting out and about to do normal every day things. Take antibacterial wipes with you if it makes you feel better, and wipe down handles, etc, use hand sanitizer throughout the day while out, hand wash before eating/drinking ,etc should all keep your risks pretty low. I work in a hospital where I am exposed to all kinds of sick people, but having good hygiene practices means I rarely catch any of it. I caught a stomach bug 2 years ago, and aside from that, haven't had anything worse than a cold in years. We all get the flu shot to minimize risks, although its not full proof either and I know plenty of people who had it this year and still caught the flu. It makes me feel somewhat better though to at least have some protection that hopefully if we get it, it won't be as bad.

ETA: with my kids when I take them out to public places, I just make it very routine to wash hands immediately when we leave, or to hand sanitize if hand washing isn't available. If you catch them quick enough to clean their hands, that greatly minimizes the risk of them putting hands in their mouth and ingesting any germs. They likely didn't have hands in the mouth while busy playing at a play area, so it's easy to clean them up before you go.

 

[felix555]

My LO has got sick maybe 4 times in his life with a cold. Once a friend's LO gave it to him and every single other time he has got sick from my OH who got sick from work / public transport. And we are always out and about ... less now he's a toddler but as a baby we were out more than in.

There is no way I'd be staying home with a baby, I'd go completely bonkers.

 

[TryinFor1]

I totally understand where you are coming from and I feel like we practice a modified version of what you are doing.
I have an almost 2 year old and a baby born at thanksgiving. Given that this flu season has been particularly bad, we have been staying home a lot. I avoid obviously sick people and I also keep my son away from other places that kids can easily swap germs (jumpy places, indoor playgrounds, church nursery, etc). However, we still get out. We go to story time (sit in the corner of the crowd away from people, lol), we go grocery shopping and we go to outdoor parks and playgrounds when the weather permits. I still have to get out once a day or I would go crazy. I try to just choose the least germy places I can think of. I understand that yes people get sick, but I sure do try to at least limit exposure

This is what were doing as well. We don't go out once a day at all but when we do we avoid the super germ filled places and go where there isn't a lot of people. We go out to eat at weird times and we've gone to the mall at weird times just to avoid people but still get out. I'm terrified of the flu, my lo was born two days after thanksgiving but I have tried to get out. You spread these illnesses by mostly sneezing and coughing and sometimes by touching something that has the virus my it, though it's actually not common to catch it that way. so avoid those places.


We wash our hands A LOT. We wipe down EVERYTHING and try to touch as little as possible.

My kids are going to get sick a lot when they get to school because I wash their hands so much and sanitize everything they come into contact with. Lol.

 

[zorak]

Goodness no, we live our lives! We never even stayed in when LO was a newborn, he was out and about immdeiately following our discharge from the hospital.

The human body needs to be exposed to bacteria/infections in order to develop a healthy immune system.

We don't really bother sanitizing toys or anything either, I'd actually rather LO got a bit sick when young as it will set his immune system up for life. My husband is a biochemical scientist and this is what he is comfortable with too.

I can't imagine staying in to hide from flu, sheesh!

 

[ttc126]

I'm same as you OP. I had a very
high risk pregnancy and was told by perinatalogists not to be out a lot. Now that my little one is here I'm keeping my 16 month old away from everyone too.

I'm probably over the top I know, but I just can't stand the idea of my baby, who I had to struggle with getting here safely and had to be born early from complications, to get sick. If it were just my 16 month old and me, I'd maybe worry less.

My husband is on leave right now so I'm not too lonely yet, but when he goes back I'm sure cabin fever will set in. I normally take my little guy to mommy and me activities, but I figure what does it hurt to wait a few weeks until the flu settles down?

 

[acrossthepond]

Thank you all for sharing your own opinions and insights, I'm really grateful to have heard from other moms. I'm seeing it's all about attentiveness and balance, without driving yourself crazy over the what ifs. Here's to a happy and healthy winter season for us all!!!

 

[mel28nicole]

I'm selective on where I take DD. I don't avoid places, but I make sure to wash my hands. I don't take DD grocery shopping, for instance, because I've seen way too many people coughing and sneezing all over everything and its just disgusting and rude. I like to gather with the family a lot, including children who are in school. Everyone is really good about keeping their children home when they are sick. Very considerate. I was sick and passed it along to DD at 4 weeks, I felt horrible even though the cold wasn't too bad. I normally don't do flu shots but I did this time since DD is too young for the shot.