Does anyone think playpens are kind of...cruel?

[nikkiandzack]

i have a playpen, a lindam one with a roof and everything its brilliant. my 10 month old LOVES it. i put him in there for an hour in the morning whilst he has his bottle and i get the housework done, then when preparing meals, and an hour in the afternoon whilst i do the washing etc then just before bed t have a little play and to have his bottle.
I have a bounce bounce baby trampoline thing but he hates it cos he cant walk around or move really.
If i leave the gate open he goes straight back in, even if I move some of his toys into lounge area
His playroom (dining room) is also jam packed with toys but he's not interested unless they are in the playpen lol. gonna have to wean him off it soon though as he will start using his playroom when he is 18 months (ish) x

 

[chocolala]

I don't think they're cruel, but I also wouldn't feel comfortable using one either, not sure why exactly, perhaps it's because I'm pretty sure Lily would hate it

Hubby was all for getting one, partly because his mum used one - perhaps that's another reason why I just knew I didn't want one for Lily. I also know that hubby would just dump her in there for as long as possible and ignore her, so that's a big reason for not getting one. But, we don't have the room anyway.

Any way, we're in the process of making the hall totally baby safe so Lily can go out there while I'm cooking etc.

 

[aliss]

We did buy those "baby gates" posted earlier and he just ripped them down.

TBH I think this falls into the "all kids are different" category... when you have a high needs toddler boy over the 100th percentile in height and weight, he does a lot more damage than your average kid that age. The playpen was great for his safety. He has even ripped a bolted door gate out of the wall.

Fortunately I don't need them anyone, he's old enough to know better, but there were a few times where it was a lifesaver

https://1.bp.blogspot.com/_kXsscQZEqkg/SwbHeqlCXyI/AAAAAAAACL8/fXJQJ85brF4/s640/51oPVoqJMeL._SL500_AA280_.jpg

 

[kimini26]

I don't think they're cruel if used in moderation. We have one (the corral kind), but my little girl has figured out how to climb to the top of it. I was going to get a baby gate for the bathroom since I can't leave the door shut due to the cats. I guess I'll need to get one of those mesh things and hope the cats don't tear it up.

 

[flashy09]

I guess if you use them to ignore your baby for hours they are, but then again so would a swing/bouncer/whatever if you leave your baby in it forever.

When they are mobile and you want to cook/clean/shower, they would be really useful to put toys in and have a safe place for baby to play

 

[Flake-y]

I think there are much worse things that are cruel to children without worrying about play pens.

I have one & it's ideal to put my LO in when I come back from getting shopping, I take him into the house & put him in it while I bring the shopping in from the car & put it away. He's perfectly happy playing with his toys.

It would be much worse putting him on the couch or on the floor as he has started launching himself forward & sideways at every opportunity, and he would likely hurt himself by falling off/into something.

Whats cruel about putting your baby down safely to play with his favourite toys for 10 minutes? Even parents who put their babies in them for long periods(which I personally don't do), as long as the baby is happy then does it matter? There are much worse things that can happen to babies.

 

[Ceejay123]

I think it depends how you use it. I know somebody (can't be specific) that used to just leave their child in there a lot of the time to keep out of the way.. Which wasnt fair. I wouldn't use one, but I understand why some people would so that the baby is safe with their toys while they get things done.

 

[hattiehippo]

I bought one when Tom was about 9 months old (like Aliss's picture) because he was cruising around everything but had no sense of danger at all. Unfortuantly for me he hated it and would scream as soon he worked out he was shut in. In the end the only use for it was for him to cruise round the inside and then the outside off. So I put up stairgates and took him to the loo instead.

I think they are a great help if you have a child/baby who is happy to be in them for short periods of time, you change the toys lots and you're not just using to sit watching TV all day. And I really wish Tom had taken to his cos it would have saved nearly 2 yrs of having to take him to the loo with me!

 

[Larkspur]

As a different point of view, here's one expert who actually recommends playpens as a safe place for babies to develop quiet, independent play.

This is a perspective that resonates a lot with me, as it was quite close to my own experience as a child.

https://www.janetlansbury.com/2010/...o-build-your-childs-focus-and-attention-span/

 

[Ozzieshunni]

As a different point of view, here's one expert who actually recommends playpens as a safe place for babies to develop quiet, independent play.

This is a perspective that resonates a lot with me, as it was quite close to my own experience as a child.

https://www.janetlansbury.com/2010/...o-build-your-childs-focus-and-attention-span/

I'll keep distracting Alex with a toy while I change him. It's that, or get poop all over the walls, lol!

 

[AngelUK]

Great link and article! Thanks Larkspur

 

[bubbles123]

I have one but I never really put him into it to play as such I just used it to put him in if I had to leave him for a minute - to answer the door or something. It wasn't practical to take him with me as he tried to run out through my legs when I open the door so it's safer to leave him in the pen. I think they are fine as long as you're not leave them in there for hours on end. X

 

[tasha41]

I had a playpen, the type that I guess would be considered a travel cot type of thing. LO used to nap in it. I didn't buy a baby change table so having the "bassinet" level in it was beneficial for me when I had a c-section and needed a higher surface that was safe to change LO's diaper.

Aside from that, I used baby gates with the stairs, occasionally put her in the playpen if I was needing to answer the door or check on dinner etc. For the price they cost they weren't worth it for us. Don't think they are 'cruel' unless you're sticking your kid in there all day and neglecting them- I highly doubt that's the case for any mums on here though, or most of the parents we are personal friends with

 

[lindseymw]

No playpens are not cruel. If the baby is left in there with no toys/interaction all day then the parent is cruel not the playpen.....

That article was quite interesting but with most articles they also give unachievable advice...no distraction whilst changing? Really? I know if i didnt distract Jacob then either his hand will go straight down to play with his bits or he'll crawl away...both things are done before I have a chance to wipe!

No TV? What else am I suppose to do between 9.25am & 10.25am if I'm not allowed to watch Jezza?

 

[firsttimer80]

we have a travel cot in the living room, he just goes in it when i need to leave the room for more than a few mins. He has lots of soft toys in there and never cries, he likes it.
But he is never in there long.. its for his safety and my piece of mind when i am on the bog!

 

[little_lady]

No playpens are not cruel. If the baby is left in there with no toys/interaction all day then the parent is cruel not the playpen.....

Exactly.

 

[meli1981]

NO!

 

[lilasmama]

We love our playpen!

This is the one we have - I have set it up with a little sofa and a pillow. LO loves it in there. I rotate her toys as well to keep it interesting. She isn't in there all day or for long periods and if I am sitting with her, I just let her have free roam of the house but it's so handy if you are alone all day (sometimes from when she wakes to when she sleeps at night) and need to have a shower, do some washing, cook dinner etc.

I even like lying around in there with her - it's big enough to fit me, OH and LO! It's so soft and comfy.

https://www.babiesonline.com.au/pi/[email protected]

 

[Starry Night]

I wish people would be a little more careful with the term "cruel" and even more so--"abuse". The average parent is just trying her best and we find our own ways to keep our kids safe.

I know it would be "cruel" to keep my guy in a playpen all day as he would get bored and anxious but at times it comes in handy! I don't really use it other than as a travel cot as mine is really small so I find the word "play" a misnomer. There's really no room for play!

However, I was down and out with a stomach virus a month ago and it was BAD. DH wasn't home and couldn't take DS with him. I was in a physical state where is was impossible to watch DS so I had to stick him in the playpen. I made sure he had some stimulating small, soft toys and there were no dangers he could get to. I plunked the pen between the couch and TV and I fell asleep on the couch. I could get some rest and know he was safe. I'm a light sleeper so if he ever fussed he was right beside me and I didn't even have to lift my head to check on him (I didn't have the strength to lift my head either).

Normally, I wouldn't leave him in there a whole morning like I did when I was sick and the pen is usually folded up in storage but I am glad it is there. I'm just glad DS will tolerate it in small doses like the day I was sick.

 

[Melissa_M]

I think it all depends on the user.

Pretty sure all of the ladies on this forum are on here because we care about our children and want to learn/seek advise from other moms, and chat about our babies, etc.

If you have a friend who is sticking her baby in a play pen for hours while he is miserable then your friend would be the cruel one, not the play pen

And obviously a thread like this will cause some women to get defensive....you're saying that a popular baby item is CRUEL haha.

I have a play pen but never used it for Alia except she'd sleep in it at MIL's. This thread just reminded me it's still there and I should try it out with Joni...she just started crawling and is gone within three seconds of me setting her down. Thanks