Does everyone have doubts?

[chocci]

Is it just me or is it normal to think like this. For some reason all my adult life i have ALWAYs had a feeling i would have problems trying to concieve. I dont know if it was female intuition or just normal worrying as people do. I had no reason to think i would not be able to conceive easily, always had regugular menstral cycle etc always been a bit light but nothing significant so why did i think like this. Friends of mine with children say that its normal that most women do feel like that until they have had a child but i feel i just snesed it somehow. Secondly i have this awful deep dpwn feeling that i will never have a child of my own without help and even then i keep thinking i was ment to adopt for some reason. Is this normal??? Do others feel the same???

By the way i am going through investigatory fertility treatment at the moment just incase anyone wondered.

 

[JASMAK]

No, I had no idea, because I had two kids. Although it took awhile for me to get pregnant with them, I did become pregnant. I had some hormone problems previously, but again, it wasn't an issue. So, no, it really hit me like a ton of bricks, espesially the m/c's.

 

[x_Rainbow_x]

yes.. iv said from a child i was adopted and i would struggle having kids....

guess what.. i found out my daddy wasnt my daddy and i cant have baby normally.

 

[FJL]

I'm the opposite...I thought we'd conceive straight away, but after about 5 months I really had a gut feeling that something was wrong. Thats why I pushed for such early testing t just 7 months TTC.

 

[miel]

i never thought i had a problem until probably past the 6 month ttc mark i really start to wonder and doubt myself ...every single month everytime AF came after that i always told my husband " i have a got feeling something must be wrong ...we call not put this on the back of just bad luck ...!"

 

[rachelle1975]

I never thought we would have problems conceiving at all - figured we were both young and healthy and it would happen - fertility problems happened to other people and i knew so many people who'd had problems, figured the odds were stacked in our favour.

Now and then i have a panic that we won't have a baby - BUT if my IVF odds are 30% then i figure 4 goes and i SHOULD get lucky. So what the hell - i will have my pregnancy in 2009 even if it costs Barclaycard a fair bit of money! You can't put a price on swollen boobs, ankles and stretch marks ladies!

 

[chocci]

and on a positive note again, if you have 30% chance with IVF then that is better than the 20% chance on a monthly basis that a completley fertile couple have so its all good then hehe

Glad we have some positive thinking going on. I felt pretty down the other day as it is new year and all, this time last year i thought i would have a baby / bump by now, but it was not ment to be, perhaps for some reason god is delaying me so that we have a child at the same time as my husbands best mate and his wife, or perhaps his sister too as they are not ready to have families yet for various reasons, so perhaps god is stopping me having one as our babies were supposed to be closer together in age? Far fetched i know but maybe fate is taking me down the path i was supposed to go down.........SIGH........ just hope there is a family for me and my husband at the end of it .....SIGH....

 

[rachelle1975]

and on a positive note again, if you have 30% chance with IVF then that is better than the 20% chance on a monthly basis that a completley fertile couple have so its all good then hehe...

Exactly - kids are meant to cost you a fortune eventually - i just figure mine will cost a fortune before they've even become embies!!

 

[chocci]

Exactly - kids are meant to cost you a fortune eventually - i just figure mine will cost a fortune before they've even become embies!!

IVF does not cost in UK does it? How many attempt do you get before it starts costing. I am only in early investigatiosn at moment so have not thought that far ahead?

 

[CurlySue]

I've always known. Never knew why or how, but I always knew. I've never been able to picture my own child and still can't, and that worries me.

 

[chocci]

Do you think everyone feels like this though before they have children. My friends all say they felt like that. I think its in every womans nature to worry about not being able to have children! Doesn't bother men as much i dont think, but i think for some reason it defines being a woman. No matter how successful you are in any other area of your life, women take it harder if they cannot easily produce a family? We feel a failure when we shouldnt!

 

[Farie]

After the 1st couple of months I just had a 'feeling' that it wasn't going to happen quickly, I don't struggle to imagine DF and I with kids etc .... it was just a feeling that it might take a while ... which it is indeed taking!

I think it might be a combination of female intuition and a natural concern?

 

[Nathyrra]

Always had doubts, I have no idea if it's intuition or just general worries.

Funny enough (or not so much!) Other people in my family have also told me they thought I would have trouble having kids :/

x

 

[Vici]

Yep, I always had a feeling that it wouldn't happen for me. When i look back at some of my posts on the PCOS forum i'm on, i can truely see i never thought it would happen. And look at me now! Keep positive girls x

 

[JASMAK]

I've always known. Never knew why or how, but I always knew. I've never been able to picture my own child and still can't, and that worries me.

I don't know if this will ease your mind, or not (it is entirely intended to ease your mind). I never ever could picture my self pregnant or having a baby in my arms until my son was placed in my arms. Even then, it was so overwhleming, I pretended I was babysitting someone else's baby for an entire week before I could believe it. x0x0

 

[NeyNey]

I know my mother lost her first child at birth - so I always had doubts in the back of my mind that it would run smoothly for us. - Never thought it would be over 3 years and counting though..

 

[chocci]

I think we need to start a success stories thread. A thread of people who had been through all the treatments and ended up with the baby they always wanted. We all need some positive thinking for 2009 i think! Goning to stop this thread and start a new one where hopefully people can tell us some success stories to get some positivity into our thinking!!

 

[hayz1981]

I've always known. Never knew why or how, but I always knew. I've never been able to picture my own child and still can't, and that worries me.

I don't know if this will ease your mind, or not (it is entirely intended to ease your mind). I never ever could picture my self pregnant or having a baby in my arms until my son was placed in my arms. Even then, it was so overwhleming, I pretended I was babysitting someone else's baby for an entire week before I could believe it. x0x0

That has really eased my mind as its something that worries me too - so thank you xx

 

[Trying4ever]

I didn't really think I would have a problem conceiving...maybe giving birth as my sister said I had small hips.....why didn't my mum tell me that I should start early??!! She has 6 kids!!! I even feel stupid for being on the pill for 2 years.

 

[chocci]

I even feel stupid for being on the pill for 2 years.

I was on the pill for 10 years..i shouldnt have bloody bothered