Does STRESS really affect fertility?

[dizzikel]

Hi ladies,

I have been TTC for 3 years and thoughout that time have had two stressful jobs. To be honest, since I have TTC I have never felt really relaxed about the whole thing and happy We have had lots of tests etc and are classified as 'unexplained' ...so do you think stress can really affect your chances of conceiving?

I am currently in the process of thinking about handing in my notice at work but am in a bit of dilemma. I have a very good job and have worked hard to achieve what I have; however, all I really want is a baby. I have been chatting with DH about my decision and he will support me whatever I choose. Quite rightly though, DH doesn't just want me to throw it all away without a good reason. I would get good maternity benefits etc but at the moment feel that that chances of me getting pg whilst being so stressed is unlikely anyway.

I am also on my first cycle of Clomid so not wanting to hand my notice in until I know if it is going to work..........Gosh! I put so much stress on myself!

I am really sorry to go on... it is just driving me mad and I don't know what to do for the best.

Kel x

 

[louis]

Hi I can definitely empathise with you. I have been ttc for nearly 3 years I have pcos and am coming to the end of my second cycle on clomid. I to have had jobs for the last 5 years that have been stressful and tiring and am currently doing a masters degree which is probably the most stressful thing I've done but am finding it hard to focus on it as this fertility stuff just seems to be taking over my life but still I think if I gave it all up I would be more stressed and verge on obsessive about this fertility thing, I think sometimes it helps to have another focus and its never as easiar as just being down to stress when people say to me it will happen when you just need to relax I get so angry these people obviously dont get what we have to go through just thought I'd offer you a supportive view lots of baby dust to you louisx

 

[dizzikel]

Thanks for the reply Louis! It is such a difficult one to sort out in my head. Guess I will just have to see how I get on with the clomid during the next two cycles.

Kel x

 

[Chris77]

TTC is so hard. It reall takes a toll on you. I do believe that stress and having a positive attitude has alot to do with TTC.

I know how you feel...it's been almost 2 years for us.

Lots of luck to you!

 

[a_missy]

if i were you i'd hang in there just a couple more months to see if clomid helps you get your BFP. if you still feel the same after a few months ttc on clomid then maybe you could chuck it all in and concentrate of getting yourself in a better position emotionally. having a great career isn't worth much to you if you're unhappy is it? good luck honey

 

[caline]

Can you reduce your hours at work and still keep your position? I was in a similar dilemma last year. We have been ttc for nearly 3 years and are currently havng IVF. I reduced down to part time in November, and it has definately helped with feeling less stressed.

Its a hard question as there are so many stories where people conceive after years of trying once thaey stop trying, or change their stressful lives etc, or maybe its just coincidence, and you hear these stories because the getting pregnant just happend to coincide with certain stress reducing events.

I think you have to do what feels right for you. Maybe
give yourself a little more time on the clomid and see what happens, as it may be a completely physical thing that can be overcome.

Good luck

 

[MrsJA]

Kel, I think you and I might be leading parallel lives... I have been asking myself exactly the same question lately.

My job is hugely stressful and for the first time in my career I've been thinking about taking a step back. I'm like you, at a real decision point..

I've been asked to apply for a promotion this week, and although I can't quite believe I am going to do it, I think I am going to take a pass.

I'm not sure how much stress matters - I change my mind about that quite a bit. I get SO sick of people telling me to relax and it will happen. Getting pregnant is not a jedi mind trick people!

But stress does affect the body I'm sure, and one thing I do know is that I'm not willing to feel as stressed as I currently do at work, when I have a little person inside me. So one way or the other, some things are going to have to change.

I'm going to wait and see if I get a BFP this cycle, then try to figure it out.

Good luck with your decision honey!

 

[Leilani]

I'm on the fence a bit on this one too.

I read somewhere (no idea where), that "Stress doesn't cause infertility, but infertility can cause stress".

I'd really like to believe it, but not sure. I too have a job which has stress points during the year - I do think of jacking it in, then when it comes to those tomes, I find it keeps my mind off all of the different waiting times.

Not really any help, but to all.

 

[peekaboo]

I have mixed opinions on this. On the one hand i feel that yes stress does affect fertility in the way that stress isn't good for your body and therefore it might not function properly. However on the other hand I have my doubts. For example in my own personal situation tests show that I ovulate on my own - so if I was that stressed surely I wouldn't be doing as stress can apparently affect ovulation. And you hear so much about people who stopped thinking about TTC and threw themselves into something else - work etc, and then got pregnant - so what the difference there? Surely having your mind occupied with ANYTHING has the same effect?! And as well if we were to give up our jobs (due to them being stresfful) wouldn't that give us more time to think about TTC?! And therefore we'd be just as stressed!

I don't understand how it all works. I wish there was a definitive answer to this question as it would make things so much easier for so many of us.

Good luck with whatever you decide. x

 

[MrsJA]

Leilani, I love that quote. Thank you for sharing!

 

[ladypink]

Hi, i am in a similar position, I am so unhappy at work that I need to move, I was meant to be moving for promotion but there isn't any out there! So now considering doing a side step. It's really hard to be focused on another job where there will be new challenges and infertitity. We are still ttc after 2 years. I can't seem to make any decisions at the moment; new job? new area? continue ttc or not? All I really want is to be a mum; I stayed in the job i am in at the mo because i thought i would be preg by now. It's a horrible position to be in! Lots of luck to you, take time with your decision xxxx

 

[dizzikel]

Thanks to everyone who has replied to this thread! Some very wise words!

I know there is no right or wrong answer. My head says one thing but my heart another - I too cannot make any decisions at the moment so think it is probably safest to see how I go on with clomid for the two cycles. It is lovely to hear your posts and realise I am not on my own out there so big hugs to everyone

On one hand I know how lucky I am to have a job given the current economic climate and realise I probably sound very ungrateful but I feel so unhappy with my current position and physically it is making me poorly

Today was my first day back after my holiday and it was okish but I was just counting down the hours until I could leave! Perhaps that is just the way to approach things at the moment...one day at a time

 

[looknomore]

I would like to share my personal experience on this issue..and yes, I have evidence on how stress effects fertility. I gave up my job about 1 and half years back wanting to get pregnant and sure it would happen within 6 months. Then, after several months and lots of AFs later we figured out that the husband was the problem. Now, I am stuck with no job and no baby and feel like quite a loser at times Anyway coming back to the stress part, I had thought that getting pregnant with my job (i was in sales and that is pretty stressful) would be a problem but it turns out, the biggest stress is trying to get pregnant. This Cylcle in my IUI I got something called "Lutinized Unruptured Follicle" which basically means that the egg was ready but refused to some out of the follicle and my doc is convinced it was due to stress. I was so stressed about having just one follie, getting the timing of the IUI right etc etc that it just refused to happen. And LUF as its termed cannot be detected in any way. The OPK will show a surge, the bbt will rise, even the progesterone level will be post ovulatory. Only a follicular monitoring can detect it. The IUI was called off for the month. Now, i am not sure how many months of peeing on OPKs and hoping I have ovulated and hoping we BD in the right time might have affected me. I dont know..But ladies..it does happen. Am trying to control my stress levels this month.

 

[dizzikel]

Thanks for sharing your experience 'looknomore'!

Sounds like you have had a really rough time and I am sorry your IUI has been cancelled It is very interesting what you said about "Lutinized Unruptured Follicle" - I didn't realise that could happen. Can they do anything about that for your next cycle?

I have been thinking about work again and have decided that even if I was to become pg in the next two months I do not want to carry on there until xmas so have written my letter of resignation. It is certainly not just the TTC thing which is making me stressed and believe that I would feel better in myself if I did go and find something else.

 

[MrsJA]

Good for you Kel.

If that is the decision you've reached, I'm sure it is the right one. Sometimes you just gotta make a change.

Well done honey

 

[dizzikel]

Good for you Kel.

If that is the decision you've reached, I'm sure it is the right one. Sometimes you just gotta make a change.

Well done honey

Thanks MrsJA After going back to work again yesterday I felt like making the decision was quite an easy one. Still not sure as to when I will actually put the letter in but am thinking the sooner the better.

 

[flobo1971]

I think pma is a big part of ttc (although I am not a big pma person generally!).

I would stick with work for at least a few clomid cycles, I got pregnant second clomid cycle, and would give it a little more time.

Very best of luck, and keep your chin up. X

 

[MarsMaiden]

I think it really depends on the type of stress and the reason. We are currently in the process of buying and selling a house and two close family members are undergoing serious medical treatments so the stress levels in theory are sky high. But I actually find the stress a good distraction from the stress of TTC and am relieved to not be focussing every day on what cycle day I'm on, where my cervix is etc etc. I am sure I am generally calmer as a result and feel much more in control.

I think the question is not whether you should give up your job because you are TTC but because you do not like the job and it is making you generally miserable, that is something you should question regardless!

But it seems that you have made your decision now so I hope that it all goes well for you. *hugs*

 

[dizzikel]

I think it really depends on the type of stress and the reason. We are currently in the process of buying and selling a house and two close family members are undergoing serious medical treatments so the stress levels in theory are sky high. But I actually find the stress a good distraction from the stress of TTC and am relieved to not be focussing every day on what cycle day I'm on, where my cervix is etc etc. I am sure I am generally calmer as a result and feel much more in control.

I think the question is not whether you should give up your job because you are TTC but because you do not like the job and it is making you generally miserable, that is something you should question regardless!

But it seems that you have made your decision now so I hope that it all goes well for you. *hugs*

Hi there,

Work certainly IS making me miserable. My notice is written but not going to hand it in until the beginning of May. I have also had a call from a counsellor today who I was referred to by my GP. I have my first appointment next week so hope this will also help to sort my head out!

Thanks for everyones comments xx

 

[Leila Fae]

I really don't know what to believe about the effects of stress. I agree that stress is not good for your body but whether it can prevent you conceiving I don't know. I too want to move jobs - mainly because I'm completely fed up with work and need a change. I also really want to work towards promotion and have applied for a couple of jobs without success. While that's not the end of the world because I do have a job, it's knocking my confidence.

My current line manager is fantastic and we get on really well. She was TTC for 6 years and can appreciate what I'm dealing with. If I do have to go down the route of treatment it will really help to have a supportive line manager. If I were to move jobs I don't know what sort of environment I'd end up in.

I really feel like my life is on hold because I don't feel that I can plan anything. I'm a bit of a control freak and not being able to control TTC is HARD!