Down to earth 30 year old looking for like minded people to buddy up with

[Longing2bAMum]

Hi i'm Kirsty and feeling a bit bewildered at the moment, I just found out a week ago that on our 16th cycle we are finally expecting I've been looking through the different groups for people due in May and some other threads which I thought could be the place for me to feel comfortable, but none of them are doing it for me. I keep reading ladies talking about all these different extravagant things they're buying ready for their babies, expensive buggy's, fancy nappy bags etc, the list go on, and I don't judge, but it's just not who I am, or what i'm about.

My partner and I don't like to consume if we can help it, but we are only human so do do it sometimes, we prefer to buy things second hand, or make our own using recyled or foraged items.

We won't be buying a buggy, we'll be wearing our baby, and i'll be making us our own persoanlised slings. We won't be wearing nappies, we'll be doing Elimination Communication (EC) We won't be buying a baby cot, we'll be co-sleeping and making our own attachment to fit our bed. I knit and sew and my husband to be works alot with wood when he's not at his day job. I am a housewife and soon to be stay at home mum.

There must be some other people on here who think in a similar way to us, no matter how far along you are, or aren't, please join me and lets share our journeys together

 

[Hanni82]

Hi Kirsty,
I'm Hannah.
Firstly one HUGE congratulations!
I understand where you are coming from with some of the ladies on this site, I found out 5 days ago that I'm pregnant and I have such a mixture of feelings. I am soooooo excited, but as it is such early days I'm afraid to admit it. I had to do another test as it hasn't really sunk in quite yet :s
I'm envious of your self sufficiency, I have knitted the odd scarf or two in the past but I'd love to have the time to make my own clothes (and some for the new arrival!).
When did you move to Sweeden? Would you say there is a better quality of life there?

I won't be offended if I'm not quite the person you are looking to have a natter to!

Hannah

 

[Longing2bAMum]

Hi Hannah congratulations to you too It is exciting isn't it, but still hard for me to believe too, I have poas a total of 7 times since I got my first bfp so don't feel bad for only doing 2

I'd love to buddy up with you

Reading back over my intro kind of sounds like I think i'm all high and mighty, but i'm totally not like that, and I certainly don't judge people for doing things differently to me, i'm just looking for some friends who aren't only about the latest things they've bought, but who want to have some good chats about things that actually matter, or things that don't because I guess different things matter to different people

We're not completely self sufficient yet, but do hope to be in the future, i've been living here for just over 2 years, I met my OH in Australia and we travelled there together for 2 years before coming back here to his home town, and we live right next door to his parents! I would say that in the north of Sweden it is very cheap to live because house prices are low and the further out intot he country you go, the lower they get! The opposite of home hey? When we were first here we were looking at some houses (well I was just for fun ) and I was finding big 4 bedroom houses out in the country with some land, newly refurbished, ready to move into for about £40,000!! Crazy isn't it! So I think I hit the jack pot with where my OH was from, it's so perfect here (most of the time) I couldn't have imagined anything better, i'm definately lucky

I don't make many of my own clothes yet, i'm stll new to sewing just since last xmas when I got my first sewing machine, but i'm getting there, have made a few dresses so far and am currently making a dress for my wedding next week!!

Where in Wales do you live? When we visit my parents we all go away together on camping holidays, my OH wants to visit Wales one day but I wouldn't know where to begin with there being so many beautiful places to see, he absolutely fell in love with cornwall when we went there last year and this year we were in Dorset, I think we'll skip camping next year, not sure how much fun it would be with a newborn but the year after we're thinking wales or the lake district!

And as you can see, i'm an essay writer once I get going lol

 

[Hanni82]

£40,000? Sweden here we come!
Im from Bridgend originally but I've moved to my fiancés neck of the woods in the Carmarthenshire area, similar reasons, houses way cheaper plus Gari works in the area and I'm a sales rep so I travel all over south wales and the south west of England so with my free deisel it made sense for me to relocate. It's much nicer down here anyway, we can see right over the Gower (now theres a place to visit!) from our bedroom window and the further you move from towns and cities, the nicer the locals seem to get!

So a double congratulations for you, with the up and coming prenuptuals!

Me and Gari had originally planned to go and get married out in Greece next year, we had found a lovely taverna, all Mamma Mia-esque, but we decided to put tha on hold and try for a baby first as I'm 30 and I've never tried to conceive before so we thought it could take a while. So I had my coil removed on the 24th August and just we would go with the flow......
Well here I am, less than a month later and having read yours and others stories I feel almost guilty, if that makes any sense? But it feels so right

The only clothes I've ever made were some cracking fancy dress costumes, and they were good! I've often felt sorry for my future children as come Christmas nativity or halloween, they will be the most convincing angel/pumpkin in their hand stitched costumes!

Oh yeh, I can go on too!!

 

[Longing2bAMum]

Wow, that's crazy quick, you are lucky, but I think you have the guilt feeling no matter how long it takes because there is always someone who has been trying longer, one of my friends on here has been trying 2.5 years and has had 2 mc's and has now moved to ntnp that makes me feel guilty that it only took us 16 cycles, but while we were ttc it felt like a lifetime!

We originally wanted to elope, but a few people made it quite clear that that would not be taken well, so here we are having a wedding with people flying in from England to stay with us for a long weekend, I think we have a total of 40 people coming to the wedding, that's including the Swedish people, it'll be informal, i'm not wearing a white gown, but I am wearing a really pretty vream party dress, I think I look like a fairy I've also knitted a cardigan and a hat and just finishing some leg warmers, it's getting cold already here, in 1.5 weeks time I can imagine it'll be freezing out

Just googled the Gower, breathtaking! That must feel amazing to wake up to that view everyday! will definately add that to our must see in Wales list

So crafting comes naturally to you then? I love that, I thought I would find it all harder than I have, but it just feels so easy to whip things up, and the reactions you get make you feel so good giving you the confidence to do more I love making presents for people so always have my eyes peeled for present idea's whenever we're out and about, I feel sorry for our future children when their friends will be "what make is that jumper?" "oh it's just something my mum made" i'm probably setting them up to be bullied

So how far along are you? have you any symptoms yet? My only consistent symptoms seems to be frequent urination and quite tired, but i've had painfull bbs and have felt slightly sick, last night and this morning, was crampy at first, but that's stopped now, oh and how could I forget I've been very very irritable with poor OH i'm not usually so this is a very definate symptom

 

[Hanni82]

Your wedding sounds perfect! Intimate and a bit different and loving the idea of leg warmers!

Ive done one of those calculator things that says I'm 4 weeks and prob about 4 days now, but in my head that doesn't make sense as I still had my coil in then! I knew before my period was late as I had a different type of cramping, I do suffer with severe pmt (doctors actually went as far as to diagnose PMDD) so I'm quite firey a week before my period and I've been calmer just more teary. I did wake up with sick in my mouth yesterday morning, but I think that was adjust a random councidence! Ive read the whole morning sickness thing normally kicks in a bit later.... Really hoping I won't get that though as it will really interfere with work! I am struggling to sting whole sentences together and my brain feels like marshmallow fluff!

Anyhows, I'd best be hitting the sack now.
It's been lovely to virtually meet you and I'm sure we will catch up soon

Let's hope your symptoms hold off at least till after your wedding!

 

[Hanni82]

Ps, you may want to change your status type thingy from TTC

 

[Longing2bAMum]

I'm wondering how people still manafe to go to work while pregnant, hats off to you all

Lovely to meet you too, I will look forward to chatting to you again

 

[happykat]

Hi Kirsty and Hannah, are you still looking for buddies? I'm due in May 2013 and this is my first baby. It's so overwhelming and I have so many questions it would be lovely to buddy up with someone. I keep asking my friend loads of questions, but as she's nearly due I think she's got enough on her plate!

I too won't be buying expensive new baby gadgets and I hate pushchairs so much I'll definitely be carrying my baby as long as possible. We're planning to use cloth nappies and make as much of our own food. I grew up being clothed from charity shops and intend to do the same for my kids

Sweden sounds amazing. We live in Yorkshire, near the Peak District, but too close to the city for my liking. Hannah I used to live in Wales and the Gower is one of the prettiest places I've ever been

I'm so glad to hear you say you haven't had many symptoms. I'm now 8 weeks and apart from lots of trips to the loo, feeling starving all the time and being bloated I haven't had many typical symptoms, which has been worrying me. Maybe I should just count myself lucky I'm not being sick

If you both feel one buddy is enough I totally understand x

 

[Longing2bAMum]

Hi happykat :wave: welcome, of course one buddy isn't enough, safety in numbers lol the more brains, the more questions can be answered

i think we are supposed to feel lucky that we don't have any of the horrid symptoms, but i think they would be a reassurance lol i just keep feeling worried that it's all just going to disappear! i have spent the day today with my friends baby and now i have a cramp on my right side going down into my hip and leg, i guess i just overdid it a bit, but it's hard to belive what you tell yourself and to not autmatically worry!

we did find something out today, i'm craving pasta! i hadn't really thought about it, i thought the rerason why i have cooked pasta for every meal this past week was just because i've been feeling food lazy, butno makes sense that it's a craving lol, i'm making a pasta baby lol i'll be the size of a house soon if this craving keeps up lol

I have never been to yorkshire, or many places up north, we plan to visit more northern places in the future though, my OH loves little english villages, the rolling countysides and the intricateness of most old buildings, he really lovesshingle buildings, everything is made of wood here so it's so new and beautiful to him, the things we take for granted in england, i'm being introduced to a completely different england perspective thanks to him

 

[happykat]

Hi! I'm not sure how the buddy thing works, do we post on this page or is there another way to send buddies messages?

The north is quite industrial, but there are some nice old mill buildings. It's funny how you miss what you don't have, I'd love to be in a new wooden building (we dream of building a log cabin from a sustainable forest) rather than an old brick house that yes has character but also needs everything replacing

I've worked out I'm craving salty things. Crisps have never tasted so good!

Do you know how to set up an email alert for new posts on threads you're following? I thought I'd done it, but I've missed 3 new posts...hmmm

 

[Hanni82]

Good afternoon ladies!
Hope all is well? It turns out I'm a proper lightweight! Ive been in bed by half nine this weekend I'm doubting myself all the time, I keep telling myself "it's early days and it shouldn't be effecting me this much" but the OH just says I'm being stubborn!
I really appreciate this little forum as my friends don't know yet and it's always nice to chat to people in a similar boat.
I've my first doctors appointment this week and I'm not quite sure what to expect. And having reccenly moved areas I know I need to change my surgery, but I'm reluctant and I don't know why.

Oh, one symptom that has shown its ugly head is I now have the worlds largest and most sensitive nipples! (I'm not being melodramatic and over reacting! Haha)

 

[Hanni82]

Asforsubscribing to the tread,go to thread too.s and a drop down box should a
Low you to subscribe x

 

[Longing2bAMum]

I'm not really a fan of the private messages because i miss them easier than I do these threads but yeah if you click on thread tools you can subscribe to the thread

You are being stubborn Hannah, i was tired before i even found out, so straight away as soon as that little egg implanted i was exhausted and now it's not just early to bed it's random, it can be the middle of the dayand i'm suddenly exhausted, I wouldn't mind if I didn't have this wedding on Friday!!! and 12 English people coming to stay with me, I may burn out!!

So I found a couple of new symptoms today, the first was my emotions I have spent the whole day crying I just couldn't stop once I started it was crazy, and for silly reasons some of the times i'm better now, but could easily star if pushed

The other and this may be tmi as we've all only just met, but I have hemorrhoids I googled it and it's a symptom I didn't know could happen in first tri, but it can, and it has, aparently it's caused by the uterus stretching and rubbing on veins going to the bottom of your body, so it can also cause varicose veins at the same time! I have the midwife on Tuesday so i'll ask her if there is anything I can do about it, but it's very common, but that made me cry today too it doesn't hurt yet, i hope it doesn't get any worse!!

I had mega sore nipples at first, but they stopped last week and now it's every now and again and instead of the nipples it more to the side and under my arms! I feel your pain.

I was saying today that I had been wishing for this bfp for so long and whenever a pregnant person complained about symptoms they were having i would think "i'd happily takes those symptoms if it meant my bfp" well i guess you really do have to be careful what you wish for lol

 

[happykat]

hiya, I've managed to subscribe to the thread now

Kirsty, is it your own wedding this weekend? I was looking back at your posts for the date. I hope you have a fantastic time!

I've had slightly tender breasts too. My main symptom is being hungry all the time. Before I found out I was pregnant I was losing weight and watching what I ate. Now I'm starving so trying to avoid the biscuits and eat fruit and nuts. I also need the loo all the time, especially at night!

Hannah I love this forum too. We've only told immediate family and a couple of close friends. I keep having to bite my tongue not to let it out!

I've had some bad bleeding and cramps this week and have been told to stay off work. I've been terrified of a mc, but am trying to stay positive as I've heard of other women bleeding and still having healthy babies. I've got an early scan this week so fingers crossed it will be good news.

I've got my first midwife appointment next week. I've been seen by my GP so far due to low hcg levels and then bleeding. I'm really worried about getting a nasty midwife! I've watched too many tv programmes about midwives and some are a bit scary!

 

[Hanni82]

Hemorrids! You poor thing we are in a bit of a catch 22, we want symptoms as it makes us feel pregnant, but on the other hand we want to get on with our lives as much as possible too!
And Kat (or should I call you Happykat?) how crappy to hear about your bleeding it must be difficult to keep your mind off it, especially not being in work. How about some mind numbing game, personally I love bejewelled as it switches my brain off for a bit, and it's not even as if the weather is any good to go out and enjoy a nice walk!
As for food, I need to loose about two stone (im quite tall) to be calssed as "healthy" I thought it may have hindered me conceiving but being so tired in the evenings it's stopping me be more prepared and making my food the night before and so I'm just ending up stopping at some supermarket out of ease, jeez, I'm lazy!

You must be looking forward to the weekend now Kirsty?! I'm excited for you

 

[happykat]

I'm Kate by the way Yes the bleeding has been worrying me. There's absolutely nothing I can do to change the outcome so I'm trying to rest and relax. The cramps have gone and the bleeding is now more like spotting so fingers crossed that's a good sign.

Ha ha nice weather-it tipped it down all day today! I finally geared up and took the dog out for a walk. She still had fun

oh I know what you mean about stopping at the supermarket. There's a new one near where I work and I'm always popping it. Despite the fridge and cupboards being full of healthy stuff I never get round to making a packed lunch!

 

[Longing2bAMum]

Yes it's my wedding, it's friday and I have 3 people arriving today, 7 on thursday and 2 on friday morning, they are all staying with me, I have to caravans and a military teepee tent for them to stay in, it's going to be a hectic and very stressful week and now that i'm pregnant i just want to get it over with so that i can focus on this pregnancy We're having a homemade wedding, we've done everything ourselves, with help from a couple of friends and my mum It should look good on the day..... I hope

Sorry you've been having cramps and bleeding, but glad to hear it is stopping now, was it just normal AF type blood? There are a million stories of women bleeding whilst pregnant and still having healthy pregnancies, so lets make sure to relax and know that you are most likely another one of those women but i'm sre easier said than done

I was the same, just before I had been really exercising and had been losing weight, but i've just eaten pasta everyday for a week, there is no hope for me now

catch 22 situations are the worst aren't they, i feel like to moan and want rid of horrid symptoms would mean taking away the pregnancy, i'm not much of a moaner usually so i think a litrtle here and there to the OH is ok

When is your first midwife next week Kate? mine is Thursday, i hope she is nice and speaks english, i can't imagine what all the pregnancy terms are in Swedish

So I probably won't be on much till next week after this mad rush of people is over, so hope i don't miss out on too much, i'll prob pop in for a read now and then, i find it hard to stay away lol Oh and i'm telling my parents and my friend tonight, wish me luck

 

[happykat]

Weddings are stressful, I bet even more so if you're pregnant. But remember you're marrying the man you love and the dad of your new baby and you'll be with all your friends and family. I hope you have a fantastic time

My bleeding was heavier and longer than normal AF and the cramps were enough to stop me in my tracks. It's just about stopped now, but I have no pregnancy symptoms at the moment and don't feel very hopeful.

My midwife appointment is next Tuesday. The NHS provide translators for mum's that aren't English so I'm sure your midwife will either speak English or they'll get you some help with translation. The rest of Europe is better at speaking English than we are at other languages

 

[happykat]

Hi ladies. I'm sorry to say I found out today the bleeding was a miscarriage. I didn't want to say anything as I know how scary early pregnancy can be and I didn't want to worry either of you. I'm just glad that we found out early and I see it as a sign from nature that something was wrong and it just wasn't meant to be. I've been a biology teacher and I see things more from a scientific point of view, which has helped me cope.

I wish you both all the best and when I do get pregnant again I'll see if your buddy thread is still going