Dummies past 3...

[karlilay]

Hello ladies. Madi is 3 in Dec, she is on love with her dummies. She doesnt have them all day, but when she is tired or sleeping. The plan was to send them to the dummy fairy at christmas. But she is just not ready. She has never fallen asleep without one in her mouth.

Have any of your kids had a dummy past three. I want to wait until she is ready, i dont want to really upset her by taking them away. But i know they have to go

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

Hi, Ruby's childminder's daughter had a dummy for sleeping past 4, she's 5 now and as far as I'm aware she still does. Most people would probably find that a bit odd but IMO there are far bigger things in this life to worry about!

Like you, we want to wait until Ruby is ready to go without her dummy, and she is nowhere near ready either, she too only has it for sleep (...and for some reason she insists on it while I dry her off after a bath but again who cares!)

 

[aliss]

Mine has never taken one!

But I firmly believe that a child will tell you when they are ready, as long as you listen. My boy was swaddled for nearly a year (which is like 5 years old in dummy years, LOL) but he let me know when he was ready.

 

[karlilay]

Thanks ladies. TBH, she has started to say things like ' i dont need these dummies now', but this is when she is just carrying them around or finds one i dont know about, has it for five minutes and then takes it out. So i think she is edging away from them. But she still insists on taking like 5 of them to bed with her. She calls me if she cant find them in the night, and cant actually seem to settle herself to sleep without one

I will just look out for signs that shes not, hopefully she will fall asleep without one, and we can just go from there. She wont be allowed to take one to preschool with her anyway, so when she sees her friends dont have one hopefully she might want to follow the crowd

 

[aliss]

Dr Sears recommends having some sort of "big boy/girl" ritual. It sounds like she doesn't want it (ie. "to be a big girl") but still has her attachment. Maybe have a little "goodbye dummy" party?

 

[AppleBlossom]

I have tried a million and one times to get rid of it. We left it out for Santa, we put it in a special box and gave it away on her birthday... LO is three and still has it but only at night. To be honest, as long as she doesn't have it stuck in her mouth all day I don't see the harm. My LO uses it as a comforter, I don't see why she shouldn't have it at night for now, same as I wouldn't take her bunny off her that she uses as her other comforter. She only gets upset when she doesn't have it so imo, it's best just to leave her until she is ready to give it up if all else fails

 

[seoj]

Thought this article was helpful...

https://www.babycenter.com/408_when-should-my-baby-stop-using-a-pacifier_1368496.bc

Sounds like, from what you've said, she is starting to get ready on her own though... so that's great!

 

[Foogirl]

I'm not a fan of dummies in older children, but it is a personal thing.

Having it only at bedtime isn't a problem in itself, my only concern would be that your daughter isn't able to settle herself without it. I would suggest by that age she should be capable of doing that and wonder how she is going to be able to settle after the dummies are gone.

But if you are entirely happy with the situation, no need to change it.

 

[JakesMummy]

It sounds as if she is close to giving it up, from what you say. I took Jakes at 16 months bit only cos he couldn't breathe through his nosewith a cold, and would Lob it out of his cot lol

But what we did do is replace his dummy with a small blanket for naps and bedtime. He loves it and settles easily with it. The first few nights without dummy were hellish but he was alot younger, so with your daughters age, it may be easier to discuss with her where the dummy will go I.e dummy fairy. Good luck!

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

My daughter had it untill she was three and THEN she had it at bedtime till she was 4, she only got rid of it just before school and it was hard but she understood more, we did a sticker chart and rewarded her with the bear factory.

Now.....she sucks her thumb

 

[Foogirl]

I just read that Babycenter link. On giving advice to give up the dummies, it suggests painting it with something to make it tasted nasty. One woman told a story about how she did this and her girl sat scrubbing it at the sink for ages and then cried a lot. But hey, that's ok because it worked.

What a horrible thing to do!!! I can imagine Abby's reaction if I decided to do something to her favourite toy "funty" the elephant to get her to give him up. She would be heart broken. I just don't think it is necessary to trick a child like that.

 

[Siyren]

lyssa's only almost two but we have no plans to do anything with her dummy, as she's learning to talk more she's gradually moving away from it during the day on her own, the closest it get to taking it off her is asking her to take it out because i cant understand her, which she does with no hassle,
i just think there are bigger issues in the world IMO x

 

[nikkip75]

My middle daughter had a dummy until she was 3.5

She was staring pre-school and her little sister was just born so we just gently suggested as she was such a big girl going to school and being a big sis she could maybe send them to the dummy fairies for any new babies being born. She was a bit hesitant but agreed. We put them in a wooden box and put them out on the door step. It took a few nights of having to settle her and give extra cuddles at bedtime but it wasn't to hard. If she had been really upset we would have caved and give them back.

I think the majority just give them up when they are ready which usually seems around the time they are starting pre-school/reception. Apart from a girl in my mums road who had hers until she was about 10!!!

Our youngest never had a dummy, not for the lack of trying though! I'm so glad she didn't now!

 

[RachA]

I'm probably in a minority - i don't think they are every ready to let them go. We got rid of my sons at 2years and 4 1/2 months. We did it at christmas and put a present under the tree from father christmas. We told him that this was for him if he gave us his dummies. He gave them to us and opened the presents (4 very cheap books). at bed time he asked for his dummies so we told him we'd have to take the books back as that was the agreement. He looked at them all and gave us back the dummies and went to sleep with the books. He's never asked for the dummies since!!!

Prior to doing this - even up to about a week before - we'd asked him to go to bed without them and he always refused to.

The reason i say that i don't think they are ever ready is that i have a rabbit that i was given as a baby and even now she 'has' to sleep in bed with me - even at nearly 34 i am not ready to let go of that comfort.

Orthodontically it's bad for children to have dummies or such their thumbs/fingers past 3.