Creative
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Feb 27, 2012
- Messages
- 1,913
- Reaction score
- 0
My OH had dyslexia. His father also had dyslexia.
when my eldest son was born 22 years ago I was aware that he had special needs from him being about 12 months old. I spoke to my HV and doctor, but they all said it's too early for intervention. finally when he was three and displaying some autistic traits they finally agreed to start investigations. He was referred to speach therapy, occupational therapy, paediatrician, audiology and was initially diagnosed as having Semantic pragmatic disorder. (on the sutistic spectrum) He was finally diagnosed with dyslexia and Aspergers when he was 7 ish.
He was very hard work growing up and had so many autistic traits that life was not exactly fun. We managed though and when we moved up to Yorkshire his schools provided the most excellent support and he now has two jobs in local schools as a lab technician and caretaker. He's come through it and although we have to be "overlookers" and "guiders" to him, he is incredibly independant.
When my second son was born two years later, he showed none of the traits my first son had. He was physically very able walking at just after 8 months and climbing out of his cot soon after and arriving downstairs in the middle of the night. He began to talk around a year and never shut up. By three he could read and so we never worried about him at all. Other people found him quite difficult to understand as he would talk like a speed talker.
he was never interested in having friends and we put this down to his "intelligence". Over the years he suceeded well at school but he was hopeless at organisation. he discovered music and started playing the violin and viola and these became very central to his life. He joined orchestras, specialist music instituations and talked and played music so much that it really took over his life. Last year he auditioned for Conservatoire (a specialist music university) and he was accepted with a scholarship. He started in September and we were very aware that he would [probably struggle with organisation so we bought him a smart phone and a time slot diary, spoke to him on skype etc and tried hard to train him in the skills he's need. Shortly after he started, he had to attend a registration session and the woman on the desk watched him filling in a form. Instantly she said to him are you dyspraxic? to which he replied no, but my dad and brother have dyslexia. The woman didn't leave it there. She went to see his head of faculty and expressed her concerns to him. He then arranged for an ed pych to see him and after four hours of tests they announced that he had a verbal IQ of 140 but that he has dyspraxia.
The guilt I am now feeling is immense. I knew. I know we supported him with the organisation etc, but when I think about it I said on many occassions to my husband I think he has dyspraxia. It would be on occasions when I watched him clap (something he finds very difficult to do (not good for a musician)) or when his organiastion was out of control, or after his year six teacher expressed her concern that he would find a cure for cancer and then loose it, or when the same teacher taught him a few years before and was a nervous wreck because in a year in her class he'd cracked his head open twice and broken his arm all by crashing into things.
And yet no one recognised his issues and we all just got frustrated with him.
The conservatoire are going to put some help in place for him and he'll have some coming to terms with it sessions. He's not upset or worried by it.
What makes it even more frustrating is that everyone I mention it to like his teachers and tutors say "why am I not surprised?"
I now worry for my unborn baby. I don't know yet if it's a boy or a girl, but as my girl is uneffected, I worry that if it is a boy we are going to be facing yet more of the unknown. Poor thing, we'll be watching like a hawk for milestones and development. Both my husband and my eldest son call their dyslexia and other problems gifts, but it still isn't an easy path to walk.
when my eldest son was born 22 years ago I was aware that he had special needs from him being about 12 months old. I spoke to my HV and doctor, but they all said it's too early for intervention. finally when he was three and displaying some autistic traits they finally agreed to start investigations. He was referred to speach therapy, occupational therapy, paediatrician, audiology and was initially diagnosed as having Semantic pragmatic disorder. (on the sutistic spectrum) He was finally diagnosed with dyslexia and Aspergers when he was 7 ish.
He was very hard work growing up and had so many autistic traits that life was not exactly fun. We managed though and when we moved up to Yorkshire his schools provided the most excellent support and he now has two jobs in local schools as a lab technician and caretaker. He's come through it and although we have to be "overlookers" and "guiders" to him, he is incredibly independant.
When my second son was born two years later, he showed none of the traits my first son had. He was physically very able walking at just after 8 months and climbing out of his cot soon after and arriving downstairs in the middle of the night. He began to talk around a year and never shut up. By three he could read and so we never worried about him at all. Other people found him quite difficult to understand as he would talk like a speed talker.
he was never interested in having friends and we put this down to his "intelligence". Over the years he suceeded well at school but he was hopeless at organisation. he discovered music and started playing the violin and viola and these became very central to his life. He joined orchestras, specialist music instituations and talked and played music so much that it really took over his life. Last year he auditioned for Conservatoire (a specialist music university) and he was accepted with a scholarship. He started in September and we were very aware that he would [probably struggle with organisation so we bought him a smart phone and a time slot diary, spoke to him on skype etc and tried hard to train him in the skills he's need. Shortly after he started, he had to attend a registration session and the woman on the desk watched him filling in a form. Instantly she said to him are you dyspraxic? to which he replied no, but my dad and brother have dyslexia. The woman didn't leave it there. She went to see his head of faculty and expressed her concerns to him. He then arranged for an ed pych to see him and after four hours of tests they announced that he had a verbal IQ of 140 but that he has dyspraxia.
The guilt I am now feeling is immense. I knew. I know we supported him with the organisation etc, but when I think about it I said on many occassions to my husband I think he has dyspraxia. It would be on occasions when I watched him clap (something he finds very difficult to do (not good for a musician)) or when his organiastion was out of control, or after his year six teacher expressed her concern that he would find a cure for cancer and then loose it, or when the same teacher taught him a few years before and was a nervous wreck because in a year in her class he'd cracked his head open twice and broken his arm all by crashing into things.
And yet no one recognised his issues and we all just got frustrated with him.
The conservatoire are going to put some help in place for him and he'll have some coming to terms with it sessions. He's not upset or worried by it.
What makes it even more frustrating is that everyone I mention it to like his teachers and tutors say "why am I not surprised?"
I now worry for my unborn baby. I don't know yet if it's a boy or a girl, but as my girl is uneffected, I worry that if it is a boy we are going to be facing yet more of the unknown. Poor thing, we'll be watching like a hawk for milestones and development. Both my husband and my eldest son call their dyslexia and other problems gifts, but it still isn't an easy path to walk.
