Early 30's TTC #1

[hopefulmama2b]

I am emotional today. I cried this morning (just a little in bed; woke up with a "woe is me" attitude) and then that damn Adele song came on my tunes and that was it - I cried again. Adele's "we could have had it all" is basically the song I was listening to when I first found out that baby wouldn't make it. I used to sob uncontrollably when I'd listen, then I thought I got over it, but, being the emotional basketcase that I am today, guess it got to me again. I would have been five months tomorrow. And now I'm just in another 2WW.

By the way ladies, I thought that I'd have a problem seeing friends' babies and I didn't in the least. Nothing. Maybe because they weren't my own? What I'm saying is, give yourself a chance with other people's babies. You might surprise yourself.

xx

I'm with you on Adele, ect. I cry so much with songs- particularly when I'm alone in the car! Ok, don't laugh, I'm not a Dion-iac or anything, but Celine Dion's song- A New Day Has Come. Talk about the water works!! She had trouble conceiving and this is a song to her son whom she fought so long for. "Everyone thought I had it all, but I was waiting for you." TEAR! Not that I'm bragging about my life, but sometimes people comment on the career success I've had and how good things are going for me, but honestly it means nothing to me without a family and this song hits home with me!

So this month I ovulated earlier than I am aware I have before. Almost missed dtd at the right time as I was expecting it to occur around day 19-21 and it happened on day 17 - would have been annoyed with myself if that had happened!!

Happy wednesday everyone.

I'm glad you didn't miss your window!! And I'm loving all of the PMA on here this month. I have my fingers crossed for all of you ladies in the 2ww!

Soleil/MsJ - I am 9DPo so just a little ahead of you guys. Feeling a bit positive too - actually took an IC this morning. Was BFN of course, but so early I'm not worried. Fingers crossed for all of us.

I agree with waht Soleil says about babies - I dont mind them, it is pregnant people I dont like seeing. I read a couple of great books recently about TTC that made me think you can be a bit slefish - dont go to a baby shower if youre not up to it. Big deal. I recommend Bump n Grind - cant remember the author but it is really funny book about TTC!

Happy Wednesday all xx

PMA! PMA! PMA!

I agree with you I don't mind babies just hate seeing pregnant people. I'll avoid my friends like the plague when they have a bun in the oven, but once the baby is born I just love them. I'm just so bitter and envious of pregnant women because I want it so bad. The actual baby part just seems a world away so I can handle that a little better. Although right after my first mc I didn't even want to look at a baby.

So not the news I was expecting, I think I'm in shock... No ovulation last month! I said "but I temp & it confirmed ovulation" and he says temping is a load of rubbish, there's so many things that affect your temperature it's the worst way to check for ovulation. So that's my thermometer going back in it's box! Due to my longer cycles and the crap progesterone levels he says he has evidence of "irregular ovulation" and is putting me on Clomid for 6 months and we're doing follicle tracking next cycle. He said if I wanted to we could just do the follicle tracking & see what happens but suggested I start the Clomid right away. I was sooo not expecting that and have had a little cry. He said the Clomid has 25% chance of twins, I knew it increased your chances but not by that much! When I told DH on the phone he went very quiet - neither of us want twins, but especially not him, he doesn't know how we'd cope. Anyway, we're gonna have a chat about it tonight. I just think if I don't start it now it's delaying things even more. I had a feeling they'd give me Clomid anyway as they hand it out like sweets but to be told no ovulation is a kick in the guts xx

MrsPTTC- I'm so sorry for this news, but I am releived for you that they discovered the problem. Now you don't have to go on month after month with false hope. You get to try something different! I wouldn't worry about the twin thing either. Like MsMax said- I think it's an icreased twin rate not an overall chance. Good luck to you and trust your doctor. I know the thought of twins sounds scary, but I'd take twins over no baby any day.

So - I'm going to put it out there and take the fall - I "feel" pregnant this cycle. I just do. I have only felt this about 3 cycles and all of them I wasnt, so my hopes arent up too much. Basically, I feel really bloated (did feel like that when got my BFP) and a bit "happier" and lots of CM and gas!!!

I would still be shocked to get my BFP but I'm going to enjoy the thought that this might just be my cycle.

FX!!!!!!!

 

[hopefulmama2b]

^^^^^ EEk sorry about that ladies!

 

[MrsPTTC]

Lol thanks hopeful! I agree, I think its 2 for the price of 1 but would rather have my children 1 at a time if possible... I've been doing a bit googling & it seems most websites are saying 7-10% chance overall. Will have to show DH so he feels a bit better about it. I still dont understand his view on the temps thing tbh, when there's a thermal shift every month but he's the expert. Well here's to a stress free month as I'm not going to opk either, then relax on holiday, then start clomid once AF arrives! x

 

[Crumbs]

Soleil Breeze, thank you for posting that! I'm so emo today too!

Rosababy, I thought it was anovulatory because my temps were so low and there was hardly a rise to start with. I've read it's normal if it happens every once in awhile, so I guess I'm just waiting for it.

MrsPTTC, awww girl, I'm so sorry. I just got back from an appointment myself and found out I ovulate weak. I've been pouty all day. My DH was born with an undescended testicle that wasn't operated on until he was 6. I thought if either of us would have problems, it would be him and not me. I'm happy to hear he's all good but I can't help but feel like a failure. Up until now I haven't taken not getting pregnant personally -- but after hearing it was my aging goods that's likely causing us to not conceive it just sucks.

But can I just say how much I love you girls? Seriously, I don't know what I would do without you all~!

 

[Crumbs]

mrsmax, I'm holding my thumbs for you! Fx! (funny Swedish expression)

As for twins, I should take this time to share the news about my cousin. She's been TTC#1 for 3 years. Both her and her husband are perfectly healthy, active people. They're also in their early 30's.

I honestly didn't even know they had problems until she told me she was expecting. They had her on Clomid for awhile but it didn't work for her. They checked her tubes, and went through all the tests. In the end she took some injections. It's a little weird because I don't know what it was she took because she got to do it at home. She said her husband basically injected her belly for 7 days in a row. They did this for 2 months. Now they're pregnant with TWINS!!!

Sidenote:
I tried explaining to my doctor here what it was she got done and my doc doesn't have a clue. My cousin's in the US Airforce and so maybe their practices are a little different. Does anyone know what it could have been?

 

[hopefulmama2b]

Hmmm...steroids, an hcg shot, progesterone, some type of ovulation stimulant? I have no idea, but it sounds like good stuf!!

 

[rosababy]

mrspttc, try not to stress about the clomid. they only have to tell you about the twins thing because they HAVE to. the chances are only slightly higher, probalby won't happen. but yay for clomid! if annovulation is the only issue, you'll be preggo in no time! warning: the first month, it gave me mad hot flashes in the middle of the night, and the 2nd month, I was an emotional nightmare. crying, pissy, you name it. I o'ed though! Too bad it didn't work for me, but that wasn't the issue for me...

mrsmax, pma!! glad to hear you're feeling good. btw, i tried to find you on fb, but there are so many of your name...and now i don't know WHAT the heck is going on with fb...

Crumbs, we love you too. sounds like she did injections for ovulation or follicle stimulation, similar to what we do for ivf or an iui. For an iui they stimulate the ovaries to make good eggs, and just put the in. Sounds like they just stimulated and let the find their own way. That's my best guess. Probably just a bit stronger than clomid.

Afm, I did my own shot last night!!!!! I'm so proud of myself. I'm seriously terrified of needles. I'm a big girl now!

 

[mrsmax]

Congrats Rosa! I dont know if I could ever do that. Well done. Only 2 weeks until egg collection - you must be so excited.FB has gone bonkers hasnt it!! I'll email you.


Crumbs and Soleil - big hugs. This is such a crazy journey.


I took a FRER this am, but it was BFN. 5 days before AF it has a 78% success rate so it is pretty likely I'm not preggo. To be honest, I was expecting that and no longer get crazy with a BFN. This month when AF arrives we make our appointment with the private clinic, so least we can get tings moving again.

Not long until the weekend.

 

[Crumbs]

Rosa, you're brave for doing it yourself! I'm such a chicken when it comes to needles, I always look away and go to my happy place when I get bloodwork. I think you're right about what she had done. I kinda want some of that stuff right now.

MrsPTTC, I didn't mean to scare you about the twins story, I was a little out of it yesterday. What I meant to include was twins run in her husband's family There's 7 sets of twins on his side!

Sooo ... my temps plummeted today. will come any day now. I think I'll buy the Clearblue Fertility Monitor. I'll be starting cycle 11 soon (cycle 12 if you count the month we were NTNT and was totally off). I know I shouldn't feel helpless and hopeless but it just feels that way.

What's really bothering me right now is it doesn't seem like these Swedish doctors want to get to know what's wrong with me. Like they're just following protocol and automatically call for IVF, and don't get me wrong, I wouldn't mind it at all, heck, I'd be excited when the time comes for it --- but they haven't even checked me fully aside from 2 vaginal ultrasounds (the 1st time with a part-timer amateur subbing for the doc on vacay). On all 3 occasions I visited the clinic, they talked about IVF as if it's the goal.

I don't get it? I'm seriously considering looking elsewhere. The thing is, anywhere else would be far and way out of the way, they'll probably charge some serious cash too. I'm so frustrated. I wish I had someone else to exchange notes with about how they do things here.

On a sidenote: I've shelled out some serious money to get a driver's license here and yet I have to jump through a few more hoops to actually take the test. Arghh. *hissy fit over* sigh

 

[Alexi201]

Hope I can join your group, seems to be the category I fall into...early 30's and TTC for 6months!

 

[MrsPTTC]

Welcome Alexi!

Rosa, well done on the shot! The IVF must be so exciting, though I'm sure very daunting.

Mrsmax, sorry for the BFN hun, though you're not out yet!

Crumbs, what's classed as weak ovulation? I've not heard that expression before. And you didn't scare me with the twins lol, I know its still unlikely!


X X

 

[MsJMouse]

So not the news I was expecting, I think I'm in shock... No ovulation last month! I said "but I temp & it confirmed ovulation" and he says temping is a load of rubbish, there's so many things that affect your temperature it's the worst way to check for ovulation. So that's my thermometer going back in it's box! Due to my longer cycles and the crap progesterone levels he says he has evidence of "irregular ovulation" and is putting me on Clomid for 6 months and we're doing follicle tracking next cycle. He said if I wanted to we could just do the follicle tracking & see what happens but suggested I start the Clomid right away. I was sooo not expecting that and have had a little cry. He said the Clomid has 25% chance of twins, I knew it increased your chances but not by that much! When I told DH on the phone he went very quiet - neither of us want twins, but especially not him, he doesn't know how we'd cope. Anyway, we're gonna have a chat about it tonight. I just think if I don't start it now it's delaying things even more. I had a feeling they'd give me Clomid anyway as they hand it out like sweets but to be told no ovulation is a kick in the guts xx

Just to put it out there, I have read somewhere that you have a slightly increased chance of twins in your thirties anyway - it increases until you hit about 35 then it drops off again. Even if you don't have a family history of twins.

Sorry to hear about the annovulatory cycle - I think I have had a few of those even with the thermal shift. Sounds like your doctor has a good plan with the follicle tracking and clomid.

So - I'm going to put it out there and take the fall - I "feel" pregnant this cycle. I just do. I have only felt this about 3 cycles and all of them I wasnt, so my hopes arent up too much. Basically, I feel really bloated (did feel like that when got my BFP) and a bit "happier" and lots of CM and gas!!!

I would still be shocked to get my BFP but I'm going to enjoy the thought that this might just be my cycle.

I am feeling a little that way myself this month.

Sorry to hear about the BFN though.

Soleil Breeze, thank you for posting that! I'm so emo today too!

Rosababy, I thought it was anovulatory because my temps were so low and there was hardly a rise to start with. I've read it's normal if it happens every once in awhile, so I guess I'm just waiting for it.

MrsPTTC, awww girl, I'm so sorry. I just got back from an appointment myself and found out I ovulate weak. I've been pouty all day. My DH was born with an undescended testicle that wasn't operated on until he was 6. I thought if either of us would have problems, it would be him and not me. I'm happy to hear he's all good but I can't help but feel like a failure. Up until now I haven't taken not getting pregnant personally -- but after hearing it was my aging goods that's likely causing us to not conceive it just sucks.

But can I just say how much I love you girls? Seriously, I don't know what I would do without you all~!

Am I right in assuming that weak ovulation is where your body tries to ovulate but you never actually do???

mrspttc, try not to stress about the clomid. they only have to tell you about the twins thing because they HAVE to. the chances are only slightly higher, probalby won't happen. but yay for clomid! if annovulation is the only issue, you'll be preggo in no time! warning: the first month, it gave me mad hot flashes in the middle of the night, and the 2nd month, I was an emotional nightmare. crying, pissy, you name it. I o'ed though! Too bad it didn't work for me, but that wasn't the issue for me...

mrsmax, pma!! glad to hear you're feeling good. btw, i tried to find you on fb, but there are so many of your name...and now i don't know WHAT the heck is going on with fb...

Crumbs, we love you too. sounds like she did injections for ovulation or follicle stimulation, similar to what we do for ivf or an iui. For an iui they stimulate the ovaries to make good eggs, and just put the in. Sounds like they just stimulated and let the find their own way. That's my best guess. Probably just a bit stronger than clomid.

Afm, I did my own shot last night!!!!! I'm so proud of myself. I'm seriously terrified of needles. I'm a big girl now!

Well done for doing your own shot. I am not sure how I would go with that myself.

If anyone wants to FB me as well, just PM me. Not that I go on FB much these days but it would be great to put some faces to the names!!!

 

[MsJMouse]

Hi Alexi, welcome.

Just wondering are you an aussie? (koala as your avatar - however you spell that word )

 

[Alexi201]

Hi Alexi, welcome.

Just wondering are you an aussie? (koala as your avatar - however you spell that word )

Thanks 4 the welcome...yeah I'm an Aussie! :0)

 

[rosababy]

Mrsmax, found ya on fb! Sorry about the bfn. They never get easy to see. Hopefully things move along quickly with the clinic. Do you have an appt yet? Almost the weekend! Closer for you...

Crumbs, thanks! injections are powerful...they make me exhausted though. Whatever it takes! Sorry you're frustrated with the care over there. Can you come stay here in the states with family for a while during your treatment? I know a lot of people do that for ivf. They fly over and stay for 3 weeks. A little fertility vacay!

Alexi, welcome! What's your story?


Afm, scan tomorrow. I have one every Friday...I guess they're just looking at the follicles. Probably today to see how the Lupron med is working. Cant start stimulating drugs until AF comes, and of course she's late as usual. Stupid witch can't ever get it right, can she?! I'm SOOOOOO exhausted. Like really really tired. And of course, I'm usually pretty wiped at the beginning of a school year, especially because I have a very active job (elementary music teacher) so I'm up, down, up, down, folk dancing, running around constantly. I come home and I have no energy to go to the gym, and I feel so chunky right now.

 

[MrsPTTC]

Thanks msjmouse!

Well I had my lightbulb moment last night! That Dr has confused me saying I didn't ovulate LAST month I got my diary out & my chart up & the blood tests were 2 cycles ago. And guess what? I took a break from charting that month! Typical . So maybe it was just one anovulatory cycle I've had, who knows but hopefully, either way, the Clomid will help me get my BFP.

Rosa, hope your AF comes soon!

X

 

[katerina]

Hi lovely ladies. How are you all?

I'm almost 31, and we are trying to TTC our first baby. We are now on the 2nd month of trying. I'm really hoping it happens soon!

to all! xxx

 

[Alexi201]

Alexi, welcome! What's your story?

Hi all, well DH and I have been married 7yrs and TTC #1 since April 2011. 6 months has past and obviously we haven't had much luck!...

I've been tracking my cycles using OPK's, then 2 months ago started tracking CM and last month started temping!! My periods are regular and average 28 day cycles...AF always comes on the expected date except in May, July and Aug...

May: CD28 & 30 got 2 faint positive preg tests.
AF came 3 days late on CD31
I even got a light pink positive preg test day 5 of AF?? weird!
Pregnancy blood test done day 7 of AF coz I was going crazy was negative.

June: faint positive preg test 2 days into AF on CD30! then negatives

July: AF 2 days late, it arrived CD31...negative preg tests

Aug: Cycle day 13 got hormone bloodwork done, results were within range below...
FSH: 13.9 IU/L - Mid cycle range 3.0-19.2
LH: 51 IU/L - Mid cycle range 10.5-85
S Oestradiol: 943 pmol/L Mid cycle range 315-1828
Progesterone 2.3nmol/L Mid cycle range 2.4-9.4
TSH 2.46 mU/L range 0.5-5.0

1 light positive preg test CD23 followed by negs.
4 days spotting from CD24-27 (very unusual as I don't usually geting spotting more than 1 day) then AF arrived on CD28

Sept: Started temping but got pretty sick at beginning of cycle and took antibiotics (temps were erratic through that time)
Started to suspect there is an issue with progesterone...
Cycle day 20 progesterone blood test = only 4.4!! extremely low, doc said probably didn't ovulate coz I was sick earlier in the cycle.
Requested ultrasound = came back normal
Started taking Vitamin B6 from O date 16 (according to FF) to increase progesterone and LP. Will take another prog test on CD 22/23 next month

It's been a frustrating few months, I've been testing with First Response Early Results tests...don't know why I kept getting faint lines and they were all within the specified time frame so shouldn't have been evaps!...

Anyways so here I am stalking pregnancy chats and trying to figure out what's preventing me from getting pregnant...

 

[mrsmax]

Happy weekend my lovely ladies.

Rosa - glad you found me I dont understand you waiting for AF? I thought you were doing shots now?! IVF sounds so confusing - but exciting!

Not sure what is going on with me. My temp shot back up to 98f this morning - so took another test just in case and it was another BFN. Not really disapointed anymore this cycle. Kinda want AF to hurry up so that I can book the appointment with the clinic.

Going to spend today baking a cake for my mum's birthday tomorrow. I love baking but have been dieting recently as TTC is making me fat! So this is a good excuse to make a cake and chill out for the arvo while it is in the oven

The next cycle will be my 17th. How depressing is that!!! Trying to think positive. I was positive I would get a BFP before Nov. Fingers crossed.

Alexi - so many false positives sounds weird. I would talk to the dr about that. I am sure I read somewhere this is something that can make you get them. Worth getting some info. The 6 month mark is a hard one, but lots of people get their BFPs around teh 6th,7th and 8th mark.

What's everyone up to?

 

[MsJMouse]

Sorry to hear about the BFN MrsMax.

Alexi201 - odd that you are getting some many ?false BFPs - definitely something to ask the docs about. As MrsMax says a lot of people get their bfps at or just after the 6 month marks. Nice to see another Aussie!!

Rosa - IVF sounds really complicated. I thought that you were on a cycle, didn't realise you have to wait to AF to arrive. FX she turns up soon then.

AFM - currently 10dpo. Temp went up a bit higher today so I thought I might as well do a test - BFN!! Oh well. Still early, last time I got a BFP I got really faint line at 12dpo (DH was questioning it at the time) but got a better one at 13dpo. So still in with a chance. Have heaps of creamy CM, cramping like AF might be around the corner and really tender breasts. So fingers crossed.

Have a great weekend everyone!