Elective C-Sections in the UK?

[YorkieMom]

I'm going to admit this this right now - and please don't judge me and think I'm immature or just "being a baby" - I'll be 30 when the baby is born.

I'm absoloutly terrified of giving birth. Seriously. I've cried myself to sleep at night fretting over it, and I even had to take a break from coming on these forums because I would get really bad anxiety attacks just thinking about birth - the ring of fire, pooping during labour, episitomies & tearing, heavy bleading and clotting for 6 weeks after birth, stinging pee after birth, etc. It's a good thing I found all this out after I was pregnant!

I really don't know if I can go through with labour. I'm seriously freaked out, and am wondering if I can get an elective c-section in the UK. I'm from Canada, and I'm pretty sure you're able to choose a c-section if you really want one.

One other thing - (tmi warning) is that I'm really really tight down there. If hubby doesn't help "stretch me out" with his fingers before we have sex, it can really hurt me when he tries to put his penis inside of me, so I'm worried that means I would tear a lot more.

 

[Flipsy]

I don't think that you can have an elective c section in the UK but the only thing I can suggest is talk to your midwife. x

 

[zoella]

Hi yorkiemom, When I was pregnant with my first I too was terrified of giving birth normally. When I looked into how to get a c section on the NHS I was told it is not done for reasons other than medically. My midwife said I would have to prove that my fears were as great as I thought they were (she said assessment with a psychiatrist who could prove I was extremely traumatised by the idea) or I would have to pay for one done privately. So either way it would have cost me money I couldn't afford. I ended up giving birth naturally, it honestly wasn't as bad as I was expecting and I was surprisingly calm once it started happening.

Talk to your midwife or doctor and see what they recommend, hope you get the birth you want xx

 

[tommyg]

I'd doubt that you'll be given the option of an elective C-Section.

I was in hospital the other week with flu and pneumonia etc and questioned if I'd need a C-Section, ie would I be strong enough to deliver naturally. The MW was very much of the view that I should be fine in a few weeks and avoid a Section if you can because they give you more problems including a longer recover, make it more difficult to BF and can give you complications in future pregnancies.

 

[Paxton]

Giving birth naturally does have the risk of all that stuff, but you will still get things like gas and air, or an epidural, so it isn't all bad The c-section can cause more complications, it's a major surgery, and there are things that can go wrong that you really don't want to death with. And I mean, worse than stinging when you pee. I don't mean to scare you, but a natural birth is way more safe than a section.

 

[hanelei]

By all accounts the pain from the incision of a c-section is considerably worse than the stinging when you pee after a natural birth, and in many cases worse than the pain from the episiotomy as well. My sister-in-law says she spent a couple of sleepless nights with the pain from her c-section incision and it was quite a while before she could hold her baby comfortably. The bleeding and discharge for several weeks afterwards will happen whether you have a c-section or a natural birth, remember.

 

[YorkieMom]

Thanks ladies. I'm just totally overwhelmed and freaked out by everything. I've always been a very anxious person, but pregnancy has kicked it into overdrive! Guess I will have to take whatever the baby and god give me!

 

[ermm23a]

If you go private, I would think you could get a c-section over there. I doubt the national health insurance there would allow it, but if you're willing to pay for it surely you could find a doctor that would do it for you.

 

[Chocciebutton]

childbirth is unpredictable and you could find that just as you start to come to terms with having a vaginal birth you end up with a caeserean after all!

 

[Sophist]

Hugs. I think we are all at the point in our pregnancies where our anxiety levels get crazy! I know I am not afraid of birth (having done it twice) but I lay awake worrying about all sorts of random things. So you are not alone hun.

There's a medical condition that can cause your vagina to be "too tight" for intercourse. I think it can be anxiety related as well. You can start doing perineal massage now to stretch your vagina and prevent tearing. Also during birth there is LOTS of lubrication happening. Your body produces fluid, there's the waters around the baby, and the baby is coated in vernix. Your body is designed to open up huge too to get that baby out.

I believe you can also get something to calm your nerves in labor as well. I never had the ring of fire, and really you are most likely unaware of it if you are pooping in labor. C-sections can cause bladder problems too, plus all the extra healing, and you still get all the afterbirth bleeding. When you have a C-section you may be prescribed narcotics afterward and that can make pooping much harder too...

I guess I'm saying I think your worries are totally founded, but that I'm not sure a C-section is going to avoid the problems you are feeling. Remember once your LO is in your arms all that discomfort is NOTHING. The bleeding is a bad period and meantime you have a gorgeous little baby to dote on. It will be OK, you will be OK...hang in there!

 

[tigs]

I really recomend you get a hypnobirthing cd - and read up about relaxation techniques...

You need to develop your knowledge about how your body will work with you during labour - and get yourself relaxed enough to hear it.

Without listenign to you body and relaxing you are going to end up in more pain.. you have plenty of time to prepare yourself...

Personally I was just like you in my first birth- I was more scared of hospitals and needles than birth .. but got though it and recovered the over side.. and even am attempting to do it again!!

Goodluck and lots of

 

[Flipsy]

where do i get a hypnobirthing cd ?

 

[tigs]

ebay sell them...

I shall add a couple of links.. this is the one I am using and this is a book i read


you can get them on amazon - just try a search...

I would really recomend it - Its making me sleep alot better and I feel much more relaxed (I will update about the actual birth in 6ih weeks )

 

[Tanikit]

I see you are only 10 weeks pregnant so far - firstly if you really want a C-section then you need to be prepared to pay for one. I suppose anyone can have what they want if they pay.

I am from South Africa and we are allowed elective C-sections here (in fact it is very much encouraged) As a type 1 diabetic I have been told by numerous people that every diabetic has a C-section - the doctors actually have little knowledge of delivering a diabetics baby naturally, but with persuasion they have agreed to do an induction for me providing certain circumstances are met.

Birth is scary either way. I know people who are so scared they ask for a general anaesthetic for a C-section (the gynaes here do refuse that as we have good anaethetists who have a lot of experience with spinals due to the high rates of C-sections) I think though that you need to take this pregnancy one step at a time - firstly make it to 12 weeks and have the 12 week scan to see how baby is doing, then the 20 week one and then you have to wait and see - is baby breech, how big is the baby, how is your health, what about prematurity - I don't want to scare you more, but pregnancies are stressful and there are so many things that can change - you may even need a C-section in the end. While I want an induction I will not know til the day ift is booked if it is the best option and may very well have to accept a C-section.

Try and stay in the present and deal with the signs of first trimester now and so on, while still asking what you need to know and discussing your fears also.

 

[sazloveschris]

I'm going to admit this this right now - and please don't judge me and think I'm immature or just "being a baby" - I'll be 30 when the baby is born.

I'm absoloutly terrified of giving birth. Seriously. I've cried myself to sleep at night fretting over it, and I even had to take a break from coming on these forums because I would get really bad anxiety attacks just thinking about birth - the ring of fire, pooping during labour, episitomies & tearing, heavy bleading and clotting for 6 weeks after birth, stinging pee after birth, etc. It's a good thing I found all this out after I was pregnant!

I really don't know if I can go through with labour. I'm seriously freaked out, and am wondering if I can get an elective c-section in the UK. I'm from Canada, and I'm pretty sure you're able to choose a c-section if you really want one.

One other thing - (tmi warning) is that I'm really really tight down there. If hubby doesn't help "stretch me out" with his fingers before we have sex, it can really hurt me when he tries to put his penis inside of me, so I'm worried that means I would tear a lot more.

Don't panic Yorkiemom! I think I was the same with my first pregnancy and thought a c sec would be the easy option, but it really isn't in terms of recovery time, complications and the emotional stress of bypassing your natural hormones.

I have had two babs and not pooped during labour, just get something to help empty your bowel when you start, like fybogel or an enema if it worries you, and that will help put your mind at ease. Episiotomies are something of a last resort in the uk, they aren't really done now as a matter of course. Ok there is a possibility of tearing but it really is just a few seconds of a sting, and would women go on to have more babies if it was so bad? nope! Im on number 3, and my first two were 10 pounds. I think if you learn to trust in your body, know it opens up to birth your baby, and then shrinks back again afterwards, it will help. Hypnobirthing and Natal hypnotherapy are excellent for this, I recommend you read these ASAP!

With regards to thinking you might have a smaller foof , this could be an anxiety based reflex/lubrication issue perhaps? womens hoohoos were built for birth, and your's will soften up and fan out (excuse the pun) just like everyone elses. I hope this helps! x

 

[butterfly23]

I'm going to admit this this right now - and please don't judge me and think I'm immature or just "being a baby" - I'll be 30 when the baby is born.

I'm absoloutly terrified of giving birth. Seriously. I've cried myself to sleep at night fretting over it, and I even had to take a break from coming on these forums because I would get really bad anxiety attacks just thinking about birth - the ring of fire, pooping during labour, episitomies & tearing, heavy bleading and clotting for 6 weeks after birth, stinging pee after birth, etc. It's a good thing I found all this out after I was pregnant!

I really don't know if I can go through with labour. I'm seriously freaked out, and am wondering if I can get an elective c-section in the UK. I'm from Canada, and I'm pretty sure you're able to choose a c-section if you really want one.

One other thing - (tmi warning) is that I'm really really tight down there. If hubby doesn't help "stretch me out" with his fingers before we have sex, it can really hurt me when he tries to put his penis inside of me, so I'm worried that means I would tear a lot more.

Not sure if you watched the documentary about pain, on UK tv last night, which basically deduced that pain is in the brain, and fear makes it worse.

I am like you, but I went for the 'Hypnobabies' course, which teaches you self hypnosis techniques to reduce fear and pain of childbirth. It has helped me tremendously. I would strongly recommend it.

BTW, I too find I need a lot of help to start feeling comfy during sex. I was convinced when I went to see my Gyno, that she would tell me that my body was not a 'normal' female anatomy, and I would not be able to give birth. She said no such thing.

 

[Armywife]

Hi honey, the other ladies are right in what they say re how difficult it will be to choose a section and about the risks etc associated with a section being high. You will likely feel lots of pain either way - labour and birthing is painful and there is no real way around that.

I wanted to add that i had an horrific birth last time and because of complications from that i have to have an elective section this time and i am PETRIFIED! I don't see is at an easy way out and if you read up on them i'm sure you'll agree. Once you start accepting that it is going to hurt but it will be so so worth it you'll find the whole thing easier to handle. The hypnobirthing cd's are a good idea for relaxation and i found last time reading as much as i could so i was prepared for any eventuality helped me. I know some women prefer the ignorance is bliss approach so you will need to decide which category you fall into and either read every birth story and 'scary' thread or avoid them all.

As i said, Poppy's birth was awful but i would honestly do it all a million times over for her. I'm not just saying it, it's so so worth it and i'm so glad i got to experience childbirth. Good luck honey x

 

[Armywife]

Oh and as for pooing in labour, this was my biggest ever fear! Seriously, i am so private about stuff like that but i did poo (quite a bit actually!) i honestly didn't care less and announced it to the whole room at the time! Hubby thought i didn't poo before that and still thinks it's the only time i ever have! As pregnancy goes on you will probably start losing your inhibitions and when in labour you will have so much to think about it really won't matter xx

 

[meg79]

I'd suggest NOT watching programms such as One Born Every Minute as they only seem to show the really dramatic ones. Go on Youtube and watch some waterbirths and hypnobirths- soooo peaceful and just shows what can be achieved when totally relaxed.

The other poster was right when talking about pain and anticipation - anticipation can create pain in your head that obviously isnt there. Also the hormones realeaed when afraid will counter-react with oxytocin that is your bodies feel-good hormone - therefore creating more pain!

This is my first, so I may be back on here in a few days eating my words, but I really feel that the more relaxed I'll be, the less painful the birth will be.... This baby has got to come out of me one way or another so I figure it's best just to relax and get on with the job so to speak!

Go and look at the natural birthing forums as well, lots of helpful girls on there who will help you to learn, that not only can you do this naturally, but also drug free!!!

xx

 

[The.Doorman]

I went to see a consultant at the hospital to see about c-section as i have lots of problems with back, hip and pelvic pain. I had a hip operation in 2009 which seemed to help a lot but about 2 months ago the pain has come back with avengence and ive been signed off work for 6 weeks.

Even with all these problems and the fact i cant sit, lie down on my back or side without a lot of pain the consultant told me i should aim for normal delivery.
Personally i know what my body doesnt like right now and a long labour would REALLY aggrevate the pain im in and would last way after ive given birth.
All i can hope is when i see a physio they will agree with me and report this to her.

I really do think i would be better off with a c-section which will take an hour max and no messing about with different positions etc.
I work in operating theatres and have looked after so many ladies having this done and know how calm, relaxing and problem free they really can be when done electively.