Emotionally drained anyone?

[Jem123]

Has anyone reached the point where they are just drained physically and emotionally?
After test upon test, waiting upon waiting, I can't physically pick myself back up and emotionally I'm just empty.
Usually I'm so upbeat And positive but as of late I can't be myself. My partner is so amazing and supportive but even with my wedding creeping upon me I'm struggling.
I'm loosing my patience quickly, getting irritated easily. It's just not me.
We are on a TTC break at the moment but I'm still undergoing tests.
Does anyone have any advice on how to get out of this funk?

 

[Hope1409]

I'm right there with you Hun. Drained emotnally, mentally, physically, you name it. 15 month ttc after my mc and still no glimmer of a bfp. This week is my last shot at iui and I am done with it all if I don't get my bfp. Gonna try and relax and go natural because I have been pumping my body with clomid for 8 months now and spending so much money on appointments all out of pocket. I am just exhausted!

 

[kas22]

Hi, I'm just popping in here as I still have a lot of admiration for us lttcer's! I would like to give you a little hope! I'm not sure how long you have been trying for but me and my oh we're trying for just over 2 years, I have pcos as oh fine! After months and months or no af ( had like 2 year if I was lucky) we finally went and got some help! I had 3 fails clomid cycles did not seven produce 1 good follicle and had a few months break the. Went on injectables, injecting myself daily to produce follicles first month nothing happened and they cancelled the cycle 2nd cycle they upped my dosage and I had 2 follicles!! And that month we were very lucky and caught the egg!! Sorry for the massive babble but even when there is no hope and you never see it happen and I no every one says it but it Will happen one way or the other!! I really wish you the best of luck and hope its sooner rather then later x

 

[HearMyPrayers]

I'm in the same boat as of lately. My plan.....forget about it. Dont dwell on TTC, find something to throw all your energy and thoughts into. I'm going to take up yoga, I'm going to get back into working out which is something I love to do but since all the appts, meds, srugery, tests upon tests, I've lost myself. And to be honest TTC should not strip you of yourself. You need to find that thing you loved to do before TTC that truly made you happy and muster all your strength to take that back up again and get back to being yourself,a happy, content, peacefully person. At the end of day I believe no amount of tears, or negative thinking, negative attitude is going to change the outcome of when and how I become a mother. So sweetie just dive head first into you wedding get lost in the details of all of it, indulge yourself in this special time, a wedding is beautiful and you remember every moment of that special day and you want the time leading up to it to be stress-free and positive. Treat yourself to a full body message, facial, pedi-mani, SPOIL yourself you deserve it!

 

[phrumkidost]

Yes, also quite drained, here! Going away for work in 2 weeks and I think it's exactly what I need to get back to myself again, baby or no baby.

 

[Princess Lou]

When we were approaching the four year mile stone I felt the worse of this (I'd been feeling like this for a while but it got worse around March and lasted till August). We took time to think about what we really want and even spoke to an adoption agency. All we had to do was call and ask to be put on the list and call to be taken from the fertility waiting lists.

After a lot of talking, crying, screaming, wondering etc we decided that we needed to try everything we can in order to conceive before going down the route of adoption.

Now I feel much better (the few weeks between getting the appointment letter and my latest appointment last Thursday were a nightmare though). I've accepted that I won't get a BFP on my own and require medical intervention and that all I can do is hope that the medication I am taking works.

I feel that once you can truly accept the hand you have been dealt you will find it easier to cope. I always though that I had accepted it but tricked myself into thinking that there was a chance I could be pregnant even though logically I knew I couldn't be. I hadn't dealt with it but now I have and feel so much more in control and all the tests I need (this morning was blood and a scan) are just a part of it.

I can't offer any advice on how you can cope better as we all do it differently. Acceptance was my way of coping but I was finally ready for it, nobody can tell you when you are ready for things.

Good luck and I hope you get through this as soon as possible, hopefully by having a BFP. X

 

[PinkPeony]

I'm in the same boat as of lately. My plan.....forget about it. Dont dwell on TTC, find something to throw all your energy and thoughts into. I'm going to take up yoga, I'm going to get back into working out which is something I love to do but since all the appts, meds, srugery, tests upon tests, I've lost myself. And to be honest TTC should not strip you of yourself. You need to find that thing you loved to do before TTC that truly made you happy and muster all your strength to take that back up again and get back to being yourself,a happy, content, peacefully person. At the end of day I believe no amount of tears, or negative thinking, negative attitude is going to change the outcome of when and how I become a mother. So sweetie just dive head first into you wedding get lost in the details of all of it, indulge yourself in this special time, a wedding is beautiful and you remember every moment of that special day and you want the time leading up to it to be stress-free and positive. Treat yourself to a full body message, facial, pedi-mani, SPOIL yourself you deserve it!

this is how I'm trying to be lately too. This month we're forced to take a break from TTC but I'm replacing it all with trying to get more into my work, taking a course on the side, do more yoga, more fun things with friends and DH etc.... Live in the moment more instead of in increments of 2 weeks. Maybe I'll start to remember who I was before I started all this.

I think it's really good advice to just immerse yourself in wedding stuff. Also when you look back you want to remember your wedding, not have it tainted with the pain of TTC.

 

[2have4kids]

I can relate to you, I'm drained and tired too. We asked my bro-in-law on vacation with us and while in Europe together he invalidated everything I said (he's divorced & rightly so). I've made a new pact to loose weight, to manage contact with people who bring me down (bro-in-law) and invest in people who help me feel happy, and I'd like to start something artsy. The hubbie wants to put the Christmas tree up early this year, he loves the lights and glitter and warm feeling of the season. So I'll head off decorating the house this weekend.

I'm going to focus on things that make me feel excited even if they're a little silly (James Bond movie!!! ). I don't know what else to do to stay happy. I feel like I'm just going through the motions, I'm not even excited about the 'plan' to be happy, ugg. The 2 bottles of wine that I drank yesterday didn't help either Maybe once I loose a little weight I'll feel better, exercise has a sneaky way of rejuvenating the spirit.

I hope you can manage the pain of infertility and all the poop goes with it and realize that I'm here with you. Do what you need to in order to nourish your soul. You are beautiful and deserving.

 

[EvieBee]

I always think the milestones make things feel a million times worse: knowing you won't have a BFP by Christmas/your birthday/anniversary; approaching the 1st/2nd/3rd year with no BFP, finding out a BFF is pregnant and vowing to have a BFP before the due date, then watching that date come and go... It's so hard! For us it's the realisation that we may have to accept we'll never have a child. We can't get any NHS funding for IUI/IVF in our area, and could never afford the thousands it would cost privately. That's a really, really hard pill to swallow

Good luck everyone - we're all in this together!

 

[EvelynnsMom]

I'm here for you! I know this may not sound right but Get a glass of wine, take a long bubble bath, put a sugar scrub on your legs, take the time to condition your hair twice. After you get out, put lotion on, light some candles, put on a good movie, make sure you get your significant other and just relax. For one night don't think about charting, or ovulating. =)

 

[Hope1409]

I'm here for you! I know this may not sound right but Get a glass of wine, take a long bubble bath, put a sugar scrub on your legs, take the time to condition your hair twice. After you get out, put lotion on, light some candles, put on a good movie, make sure you get your significant other and just relax. For one night don't think about charting, or ovulating. =)

this sounds really good! i might just attempt this tomorrow night so we can be relaxed before our RE appointment thursday morning. btw, how do you make a sugar scrub? lol sorry if it's a silly question

 

[2have4kids]

https://beauty.about.com/od/skinflaws/ht/saltscrub.htm
I love the scrub idea and will try it friday for super soft skin. I have lots of salt at home so will try that instead of the sugar. A bath with a glass of wine and music sounds lovely.

 

[Jem123]

Thank you for your replies. I've been ttc for 2 and a half years. We are now on the waiting list for ivf. We should have our first appointment in August 2013. I had tests done with my gp before she referred me to the fertility clinic where I had to have the same tests done again and more. After the mc me and OH agreed to take a break until after our wedding. Prob is now I've been so organised with planning that there is nothing I can do til after Christmas.
I've started working out again to get in shape for my honeymoon! I've also started pampering myself with facials and pedicures.

 

[Jem123]

P.s. I forgot to say that my fertility doctor is starting me on clomid in January but I'm hoping to put it off for a few months as my body need a break x

 

[Kimiw]

Has anyone reached the point where they are just drained physically and emotionally?
After test upon test, waiting upon waiting, I can't physically pick myself back up and emotionally I'm just empty.
Usually I'm so upbeat And positive but as of late I can't be myself. My partner is so amazing and supportive but even with my wedding creeping upon me I'm struggling.
I'm loosing my patience quickly, getting irritated easily. It's just not me.
We are on a TTC break at the moment but I'm still undergoing tests.
Does anyone have any advice on how to get out of this funk?

Hi there hun,

I know how you are feeling. Me and my dh have been trying for 6 long years. I had my first BFP in August of 2012 after my second round of clomid. Sadly we lost the baby at 6 weeks. It took us 6 years to see finally see a BFP so we were pretty torn up when it was taken away from us. I am feeling drained in every way possible, emotionally, physically, and finacially. It has been such a drag. I did my third round of clomid (didn't respond at all no follicles to speak of) and now my RE is cutting me off of it. He wants to put me on injectables now, but I don't know if me and my hubby can afford that. We want to have a baby (even if it was only one) but it is getting to be too much and we don't know if we can afford the injectables. It just seems so unfair that we have to go through this. All of us. We probably know more than anybody else how much we want to have children. Having children is taken for granted by so many people, if they could only walk in our shoes for a while and see that they are truly lucky to not have to deal with this kind of pain.

I hate that there is something I want so bad but it is out of my reach. Everybody around me is either having a baby or already have their little ones. I am 30 years old, most of my friends already have 2 or 3 kids and they are already entering their pre-teen phase. And Christmas is coming up, and me and DH are just burdened with sadness. No children to take to see Santa, or decorating the tree and filling it with presents for our little family. I know one doesn't need children to have a good christmas, it's just christmas is the one holiday you think about children, and family, and all we want is a family

 

[YearningHeart]

Jem123,

Dont worry... I know it gets tough after waiting and waiting, stay strong. One day your dreams will come true. I feel lik that many times.. and am right now too, I have my followin up appointment coming up and I need to lose weight5 before then. Losing weight is so hard for me especially having PCOS. Sometimes I feel like just giving up and being alone and cry. Its so much for the heart to bare but always remember there is light at the end of the tunnel. Have hope and stay strong!

Best of luck. x

 

[V2R]

Totally understand I have been totally drained with TTC passed few months I cannot pick myself up & it is not like me at all....I think it's with christmas approaching & I'm away to be 33 next month.
I have thrown myself back into exercise classes I had stopped high impact exercise for 2years & only been going swimming but whats the point I need something to thrash out my anger.

Good Luck to everyone xx

 

[Jem123]

Maybe if we stop thinking about it so much then we will get better results but its so hard sometimes.
Some people dont deserve to have children and do and others who deserve to be parents cant. Sometimes things dont make sense.

 

[Hope1409]

I couldn't agree with you more Jem. And I think it is our bodies shutting down becuase we want it and think about it so much. I'm trying to relax this month and even though ttc is still in the back on my mind, I am doing my best to stay calm and anxiety free.

 

[2have4kids]

Oh you guys, I was just on pinterest-ing and found these heavenly sugar cubes. Going to make them for Christmas https://pinterest.com/pin/149041068889942136/