father in need of advice

[allblacks]

hi all ,i'm after some advice if anyone could help.

me and the wife have split up and im still in the house ,the mortgage is in her name and i need to find somewhere to live for the 2 children to visit (both under 9 one boy one girl)

at the moment we are talking and trying not to get legal but sort things out ourselves but she wants me out the house.

i'm happy to go as long as i have somewhere to live and she had agreed to a 50/50 custody of the kids via a parental agreement but it looks as tho this may not be enough for the council to help me. i find this odd if we are both going to have the children the same amount of time, i have mentioned this to her and asked if i can have the child benefit in my name which on paper would make me the man carer (im lead to believe) and i think she may agree to this.

my question is if i am the main carer would this be enough for help for housing, i need to stay local to my job the kids school and my ex is also local and i think it work out quite nicely.

thank you for your time

ab

 

[moomin_troll]

ur married so whats hers is urs right now so u dont have to leave the home just because she says so. if ur the one getting the child benifit that does mean ur the main carer. ive never had much luck with council housing, so would u be able to save up and privatly rent? i no if u did that the council can help with the deposit.

because ur the main carer it should help with housing, if ur ex gives u a eviction notice letter that will also help u up the list but u might be put into a hostel first

 

[allblacks]

thanks for the reply and i understand as we are married i dont have to leave the house , i want nothing from the house and my main concern is the children.
i need to get out before it had the chance to get ugly tho but until i have been given a catogory and what house i may get i will have to stay put (as i give up my rights as soon as i move out ).

in my eyes it makes no difference to who the main carer is as we will carry on as normal as we always have.

 

[moomin_troll]

i hope ur local council/housing can help u soon. my local council wouldnt help me when i was made homeless and my eldest was 3 months old, thats why if u can afford the rent id look at privatly renting, maybe look at adds in ur local paper for private landlords.

 

[Laura2919]

I think your best bet is to contact the council and see what they say. Its hard cos your going through a seperation and the last thing you want is to be living in the same house so I would definitely see if she can write you an eviction notice and see if the council can do anything with that. They may ask you to make plans to sell the house or for your wife to buy you out.
Is there no way private renting would suit your needs?

 

[allblacks]

i only want to do private renting as a very last resort as the prices are massive where i currently live and i would be able to afford it.

the mortgage has always been in the wifes name and there would be no monies in the house to split even if she sold it and instead of just me at the councils door there would be the wife aswell.

 

[moomin_troll]

it doesnt matter who the mortgages name is in, once married everything is community property so half the value of that house is urs. that will come up in the divorce.

all u can do is make a appointment with council and put ur name down with housing associations n get a eviction notice from ur ex with a date u have to be out by

 

[Laura2919]

I agree with Moomin. It doesnt matter, if your married then you share everything 50/50. I definitely agree that you need to go to the council, they will be able to asist you the best way.
As for private renting, you might be entitled to some help from Housing Benefit.

 

[allblacks]

honestly i want nothing from the house or her , all i want is to share my kids in a half decent place to call home and start to rebuild my life. what is the point of a brief and courts if you have both agreed on everything anyway. keep the money grabbing law pen pushers out of it i say

if i took from the house i would be taking from the kids and im not prepared to do that , ive seen first hand what a divorce does to kids and i will be damned if it will happen to mine and if it means i roll over and take nothing then so be it.

 

[Laura2919]

Well I know for certain I havent suggested legal action but the council may not want to house someone who has money in a house.

I would definitely go see your council for advice.

 

[allblacks]

there is none in the house to split !!!!!

 

[moomin_troll]

its good the way u want things to go and to keep everything as normal as possible for the kids.

good luck talking to the council and i hope they can help u but most councils now are turning people away and tellin ppl to private rent, especialy if they are working. when my oh was here together our wages were £1200 at one point and we were told we earnt too much for their help.

i do no a single dad (fulltime single dad tho)who worked full time, he was private renting and got his rent paid by housing. so its worth looking into that.

maybe talk to citizens advise about what ur entitled too benifit wise

 

[Laura2919]

But you still have a mortgage so you do have a place to live this is the reason I am saying go to the council and see what they advise but housing is so low right now they will more than likely tell you to private rent.

 

[dustbunny]

You might find this link useful: https://www.family-lawfirm.co.uk/up...d-separation-by-Woolley-and-Co-solicitors.pdf

Also it does depend if both your names are on the house [so to speak] it is not entirely crystal clear as 50/50. I know that sometimes the council will put towards private renting, if not cover the costs of the rent. There are also numerous benefits you are entitled to. It would be best to go to your local job centre or citizens advice centre to find out more information with regards to funding.
Also, if you do not find somewhere suitable to live which allows your children to have sufficient comfort etc then your wife does not have to agree to let your children stay with you. You do have parental rights but what I'm trying to suggest [wording it so badly] is that it might be better to look into private renting.