Fed up of others comments!

[2have4kids]

I agree with the rest of the ladies, to the people who requested pics and then made rude comments, cut them right off. I've viewed pregnancy and being a mom as an educational experience for me and those around me. Sometimes you get the know-it-all mother who will put you down in what you've chosen for ____insert your topic here, for what you chose for a stroller, sleep training, delivery plan etc etc etc. They come off as oh we did this and we were told it's the best way. And I always respond with well I'm glad that worked for you, we've looked into it and this is what works for us. And with the bump, the tinier you are the more you have to show and to gain with a bump. My 5'2 gf was huge and because of this was convinced that her baby was so big it wouldn't fit through so she booked an elective section, her baby was normal size weight and I would never ever book a section unless it's an emergency and totally necessary. We all have different ways, I didn't put her down for her choices, but when she expected me to be booking a section because I have twins I educated her that not all twins need to have sections to be delivered and if I don't have to go through the pain and healing time of a section, I'll choose not to thank you. Draw your boundaries with people who've made you feel bad and educate them for goodness sake, don't put up with rude comments without letting them know that hello you aren't a bean stalk and the baby has to go somewhere! The smaller you are, the more you're meant to gain and the more you'll show. Maybe you'll save them from doing that you you a second time and maybe they'll check themselves before making rude comments to another pregnant woman.

 

[mrs unicorn]

Thanks for all your advice ladies, I'm feeling 10x better today. DH was very complimentary yesterday and also reminded me that these were the same family members that said down right stupid things after the mc I had earlier in the year. I know they don't mean it in a nasty way, but gosh some people are just thick!! I think they would say the wrong thing to anyone in any situation!

I am going to make it clear that I think they are being rude the next time I get one, and also remind them that I am actually carrying a baby - I'm supposed to look like this!! Also no more pictures for them And if they ask for one, I'll say something like 'only if you are not going to make any daft comments again'

2have4kids - that's shocking about your friend and the section. Was she happy with her decision even though the baby was 'normal' size? Someone actually said to me 'you'll probably have to have a C-section as it's clearly going to be a massive baby. You won't be able to get it out yourself.' WTF? Didn't know they were a doctor/midwife who can tell these things just by looking at me at 15 weeks pregnant! Utter crap!

 

[2have4kids]

2have4kids - that's shocking about your friend and the section. Was she happy with her decision even though the baby was 'normal' size? Someone actually said to me 'you'll probably have to have a C-section as it's clearly going to be a massive baby. You won't be able to get it out yourself.' WTF? Didn't know they were a doctor/midwife who can tell these things just by looking at me at 15 weeks pregnant! Utter crap!

I love your idea of letting them know that if you do send them another photo they can't make daft comments again...meaning they've been stupid previously and you won't tolerate that nonsense again. Wake up!

What I didn't tell you originally about my friend is that she was talked into it by her doctor (she's in the States where docs get up to 6x more $$$ for section deliveries) AND she views bd as one of the highest important things in her relationship (unfortunately). She's hopped from guy to guy because she hasn't been 'satisfied'. She asked me after my first if I 'stretched' and if bd-ing changed. She even circumcised her son because she 'prefers' circumcised men in bed. I thought this was SO self centered, I haven't spoken to her since. She has some weird beliefs beyond just being a big baby. Not everyone gets leaky bladders, no you don't stretch so much during labour that bd'ing is no longer fun...I can't help think it's a complete lack of education. I mean I'm 6 months in with twins on a second pregnancy and still don't leak when I sneeze lol. We're all different. I realize we all have different motivations, I try hard to make my decisions based on sound scientific/medical evidence rather than emotional, anecdotal feelings. She also doesn't like needles so she refused to get the recommended Whooping Cough vaccination in her 3rd tri to protect her baby. I think she's got a steep learning curve to provide and be considerate for/to another human being as she grows into the role of being a mom. And I do try hard not to judge because I know how much it hurts to be judged myself! I've actually distanced myself from this gf as her last information about circumcising her baby made me so angry I didn't want to get into it with her

 

[ProudArmyWife]

I don't think people really think about what they say before they say it. This is pregnancy number theee for me and I'm constantly being asked when I'm due as if I'm about to pop it bothered me the first time I was pregnant but honestly now I don't even pay attention and for me it continued from there into people commenting on how big my babies were. (I make chunky babies ) I wouldn't worry to much. You have a beautiful bump and like you said your pregnant your body is supposed to grow and change!

Here's a comparison of me around 20 weeks with all 3. You can't tell babies size just based off your bump as I've had a 7lb baby and a 9lb baby and would say I wasn't much bigger during my second pregnancy than my first

 

[2ducks]

You are small so you may be showing a little earlier than others. No big deal! I can't wait to have a decent bump, right now I just look a little chunky in the tummy.

 

[Talia12]

Hey, me and my sister were pregnant at the same time (yeah, my mum nearly had a heart attack) and she had a bigger than average bump whereas mine was non-existent until 22 weeks. We both moaned about how annoying the comments were! She was always getting "you sure it's not twins?" "wow, you look ready to pop" etc, whereas I got "are you sure you're pregnant?" "are you eating enough?" "you don't look pregnant at all".
For her, it made her feel like a whale. For me, it made me feel like I wasn't "properly" pregnant, or something. People will always bloody find something to say, there isn't much else many people can find to say about pregnancy other than comment on the size of your bump! Just ignore those people, smile and inwardly punch them.

 

[His Princess]

I think people mean well but I can understand that it can be annoying and hurtful. I'm almost 16 weeks and my bump is pretty big (bigger than yours looks in your pic) but it is my second.

I'd only just started showing at this point with my first but by 26 weeks or so, I was big. I always measured further ahead (9 weeks ahead at one point) and people constantly made comments. People constantly felt the need to tell me I was going to have a 9-10lber- at 37 weeks, we were told my little boy was IUGR and was a little over 6lb, so the size of my bump meant nothing.

 

[03babysquish]

No, not at all! Honestly, I think everyones family/friends say that. It's as if they forget how big they were! Many people glamorize their bumps or weight after having their baby. I wouldn't believe them much, or think anything is wrong with you.

 

[EverythingXd]

No, not at all! Honestly, I think everyones family/friends say that. It's as if they forget how big they were! Many people glamorize their bumps or weight after having their baby. I wouldn't believe them much, or think anything is wrong with you.

I met a friend on Friday, took my coat off and she said she doesn't think she got as big as me even full term

This same friend has told me several times that she was back in her size 10 jeans when she left the hospital after giving birth... I have never shifted my baby tummy very quickly even with baby no.1! It took 6 weeks after DS2 for me to stop looking pregnant!

To be fair to her, I think I'd be bragging if I was her! I bet some of my friends who had long labours hate it when I talk about giving birth to DS2 17 minutes after being rushed to delivery from hospital reception!

 

[03babysquish]

Yeah, exactly! Friends always do this. I honestly have NEVER seen a full term woman who looked to be as if she wasn't full term. Everyone has a different belly, so sure if someone weighs less or is tiny, they will look smaller, but their belly is proportional to their body. I just feel like some of them look at themselves in a way that isn't true ya know? It's like, you looked pregnant. Get over it. hahahah

No, not at all! Honestly, I think everyones family/friends say that. It's as if they forget how big they were! Many people glamorize their bumps or weight after having their baby. I wouldn't believe them much, or think anything is wrong with you.

I met a friend on Friday, took my coat off and she said she doesn't think she got as big as me even full term

This same friend has told me several times that she was back in her size 10 jeans when she left the hospital after giving birth... I have never shifted my baby tummy very quickly even with baby no.1! It took 6 weeks after DS2 for me to stop looking pregnant!

To be fair to her, I think I'd be bragging if I was her! I bet some of my friends who had long labours hate it when I talk about giving birth to DS2 17 minutes after being rushed to delivery from hospital reception!

 

[arturia]

This is my first baby (after an early loss) so it's all new to me, but what is with people?! The comments I've had, from family members, about the size of my bump already are really p*****g me off! They don't live close so have been asking for pics of the bump, then I get 'OMG' 'LOL' 'it's going to be a huge baby' 'I was 6 months before I was as big as you' or 'are you sure they've got your dates right? I am petite, 5ft2" and (was) size 8uk, and although I've put on weight I'm well within the healthy range so far. Normally I couldn't care less about what others think or say about me but just so fed up of these comments, I actually find them upsetting. It's making me paranoid that I'm not 'normal'. Am I really obscenely big?!

Also, please feel free to add your rant on here too!

I really like that picture you posted of the cat! So cute!

In all seriousness, people need to butt out on the comments about other people's bodies.