Feel really stupid

[aimee-lou]

I just need to vent a little bit as I feel really silly.

A couple of days ago a friend of mine wrote a post of Facebook (cue Jeremy kyle-esque groan lol) about the school. not directly but basically complaining about an ill child who had returned to school. The child is in my sons class and stupidly I wrote a flippant 'Oh I didn't know' comment. Nothing judgemental, not my place, but I knew I shouldn't have got involved. Cue today the phone rings, it's the deputy head, giving me a friendly but obviously meant as a reprimand type telling off about school policy and social media etc. I have already had a run-in with the school over a job I took as a dinner lady which they then changed on my first day as caring for a special needs child 1-2-1, which I had to hand in notice after 1 shift as I couldn't do it. I fear that my son's care and education is going to suffer due to a failure in relationship with the school...which I feel is entirely unfair. I have never been 100% happy about him attending there but as we're in all liklihood moving this summer we kept him there as it's only 1 year. Now I worry that we will have black marks so when we move his record will be stained due to MY conduct (I don't think I've done anything particularly wrong but you know how things end up looking worse on formal records). I am not aware of how much say a school has when a child moves. I am also upset as I feel like I've been scolded for something like a child and it has put me really on the defensive.

I don't know why it's rattled me. I'm having a bad day generally but this really got to me. I have learned from bitter experience where these kinds of relationships lead and I'm so worried that this will get worse and end up affecting my son. Should I go to the school and try to clear the air? Should I just leave it as in all liklihood with 300 kids on their roll, they don't actually have an issue. I get on well with Earl's class teacher, so I guess that's the important bit. I just worry.

 

[alibaba24]

I would probably just leave it to be honest. If it was to affect your sons schooling it would be highly unproffesional and not worth their time to even try to be awkward ( I dont think they would anyway) I think they probably deal with things like this all the time and probably much more justified circumstances

try not to fret

 

[hattiehippo]

I'd leave it. I know it feels like being told off but it's important to be really careful on things like Facebook as comments can cause loads of problems for schools with parents then falling out.

When you move to another school it's very unlikely the school will past on any information except how your DS is getting on academically. They don't normally comment on parents and tbh a lot of schools don't actually ask for any information anyway. They like to make their own judgements once the child starts.

 

[Quartz]

I would leave it. Beyond whats happened they probably have not thought much about it (or with the number of pupils remember it). It would be totally unprofessional of them to mention it if he moved or to discuss it (particularly the dinner lady job as that has nothing to do with Earl. One of DD best friends is a teacher at the school and when we do playdates we have to be careful (both of us) as to what we say so that a line is not crossed

 

[Jchihuahua]

I have never been asked for information about parents when a child moves school, only information on the child's attainment and any SEN.

Don't worry by the way. I bet the school won't give it a second thought now they have mentioned it to you. Social media does cause all manner of issues so I can kind of see why they would say something if they have a policy to do that. They will have SO much worse to deal with with other parents than something small like that though, believe me!

 

[Kte]

Don't worry about it, I'm sure your over it now anyway. They have a policy they have to follow and will have spoken to others not just you. There won't be anything written down on any kind of file to transfer over to his other school, like others say, so much more to be having to deal with

 

[JASMAK]

To me it seems strange they would make a stink about that but things are different here I suppose. I certainly wouldn't worry about it. Personally I think it's a parents right to make a complaint when children come sick and the schools responsibility to ensure kids do not come to school sick. Our school has a Facebook group and this kind if thing is discussed openly without names involved... so unless I missed something (besides it being a 'policy'...I say you are within your right.

 

[Take2]

On a bit of a side note, my child has severe hay fever which often looks like she has a cold or the flu, I can't keep her home for 3 months of the year which is roughly how long she suffers badly. Perhaps this child has a similar problem, I know this isn't really the focus of this conversation but I think sometimes people presume I am a bad mother for sending my child to school to spread her germs around but this just isn't the case. Just a bit of food for thought for people who think its acceptable to complain about sick kids at school.
But as for the actual question here, I'm sure the school just felt it was their duty to follow up on the complaint of an upset parent, the deputy head probably felt very bad about having to call you but also felt obligated to address the other parents concerns. It would be very unprofessional of the school to judge you or allow it to affect the professional relationship between them and you the parent and your son as a student. It will blow over quickly I'm sure.