Feeling a little down at the moment...

[Darlin65]

I am not sure if it is okay to talk about this on here so I apologize in advance wasn't sure where to post...

DF and I are trying to conceive #1 but I am a little upset with myself at the moment. Last summer we weren't ready for a and we had a close call where we might have ended up with one. We hadn't found our house yet(but were looking very hard) and were in a tiny apartment that we felt we would be stuck in forever and DF still had a large amount of schooling left. This caused me to do a silly and stupid thing. DF asked me to take the morning after pill, and I did. Well if I hadn't then maybe I could be a proud momma of a 2 month old baby right now It really tears me up that I did that and I can't stop thinking about it. DF says I can't dwindle on the past and live my life wondering what if because there may not have ever been a even if I didn't do it. I just don't know what to do. It is making this TTC stuff really hard for me especially with my this month. I feel like such a loserI have a picture box I keep things I get on sale like I have a couple $3 sleeper I found and a set of little sockies I got for free. Well I laid in bed the other night with my favorite sleeper and just cried it out. Not my proudest moment, DF came in and saw the whole thing.

 

[celica]

DF asked me to take the morning after pill, and I did. Well if I hadn't I could be a proud momma of a 2 month old baby right now It really tears me up that I did that and I can't stop thinking about it.

It's not like that. Take it easy. It's not so easy to become pregnant.

 

[Darlin65]

DF asked me to take the morning after pill, and I did. Well if I hadn't I could be a proud momma of a 2 month old baby right now It really tears me up that I did that and I can't stop thinking about it.

It's not like that. Take it easy. It's not so easy to become pregnant.

Sorry it is late and I am getting sleepywhat do you mean it's not like that?

 

[celica]

I mean the chance to concieve is not so big, so probably you woulden't a momma of 2 month old baby now.

 

[Darlin65]

Oh I know it isn't likely just kind of bothers me not knowing because it was a possibility. Guess I just feel like it shouldn't have been my decision if that makes any sense.

 

[mandapanda27]

I'm so sorry you're feel down Hun! I know how you feel. I have had 2 miscarriages and find it hard not to blame myself for them. It's so hard to not get down on this roller-coaster we call our TTC Journey. Hang in there! Hopefully soon you'll have a BFP to look at and a baby in your arms soon after!

Sending your way!!

 

[Bubbles2307]

First things first missus. Stop beating yourself up about it. Xxxxxx
It obviously wasn't the right time xxx but I know exactly what you mean 9 years ago I very selfishly had an abortion my bf at the time forced me in to it as I was only 18 and sorry if it's TMI but he used to beat me up too.

But 9 years later I'm married to the guy of my dreams who would never do anything of the sort and now we so desperatly want a child so we can share our love with him/her there's not a day goes by I don't think about what happened but we can't dwell on it as it would tear us up xxxxxx

Hope this helps xxxxxxxxx

 

[Darlin65]

First things first missus. Stop beating yourself up about it. Xxxxxx
It obviously wasn't the right time xxx but I know exactly what you mean 9 years ago I very selfishly had an abortion my bf at the time forced me in to it as I was only 18 and sorry if it's TMI but he used to beat me up too.

But 9 years later I'm married to the guy of my dreams who would never do anything of the sort and now we so desperatly want a child so we can share our love with him/her there's not a day goes by I don't think about what happened but we can't dwell on it as it would tear us up xxxxxx

Hope this helps xxxxxxxxx

Thanks. DF feels horrible, says he was just young and scared and I really didn't see much wrong with it at the time. I had a really rough experience with it though. The pill made me very ill. I woke up screaming in the middle of the night from stomach painsand scared the crap out of DFHe still feels really bad about the whole thing and thinks it was his fault but he never pressured me I just agreed not thinking about ow I would feel later. I've wanted a baby for about three yrs so that is prob why it left it's little scar on me. Thanks ladies