Feeling like maybe my body isn't meant for this

[amy8686]

I'm having a crisis of doubt. Having recently had my first failed IUI (on my 4th month of Clomid), we're getting ready to move to injectables/IUI next month. It's getting realer.

And mixed up in the many emotions, I keep coming back to this feeling that perhaps my body just isn't meant to be pregnant. Perhaps whatever issue is making it so hard to get pregnant (unexplained except for one blocked tube) would also make for a difficult pregnancy or unhealthy baby. I know in my head that this isn't the case, because so many women undergo various forms of assisted conception and have perfectly healthy pregnancies and babies, but it just feels like I'm fighting nature here.

Anyone else feel like this? Talk me out of it, please.

Amy

 

[heres_hoping]

You are not fighting nature any more than having chemotherapy for cancer is fighting nature, or setting a broken bone, or taking medical help for any health problem. I know it feels that way sometimes, I have had my share of those thoughts, but I am slowly coming around to the mindset that I have a problem for which there is help available, and I am getting that help. Like all medical interventions there are no guarantees, but by going through all this I am giving myself and my body the best chance.

 

[Molae06]

You are not fighting nature any more than having chemotherapy for cancer is fighting nature, or setting a broken bone, or taking medical help for any health problem. I know it feels that way sometimes, I have had my share of those thoughts, but I am slowly coming around to the mindset that I have a problem for which there is help available, and I am getting that help. Like all medical interventions there are no guarantees, but by going through all this I am giving myself and my body the best chance.

I am so glad I read this. When you say you are not fighting nature any more than having chemotherapy for cancer is fighting nature, or setting a bone, I have been looking for words like this to explain it forever. Some of my family is on the "It will happen when it happens, and if it was meant to be then it would be" and I have tried explaining that something being meant to be won't always happen without intervention. I too have my doubts sometimes so it's good to have it put in perspective that it IS a medical condition.

 

[Sunshine24]

It IS a medical condition and you are ABSOLUTELY right to treat it. You're not dealing with all this because your body isn't meant to have a baby, I truly believe those of us deal with infertility become stronger moms and people because of it.

DONT take it as a sign youre not supposed to have a baby. One legged people run marathons, deaf people play music, and on and on.......infertile people have babies!!! Like me! I had 5 failed IUIs, surgery, and now am having a healthy successful pregnancy as a result of IVF.

It's easy to get down on yourself but just remember when your baby is here you will be the strongest mother for having gone through this!

 

[amy8686]

Thanks, ladies! You're the best. I feel better about things.

Injectables came in the mail this week, to be started in a week or so. Here we go.

 

[hopster]

Just wanted to say good luck. I am also on injectables + IUI post 3 failed clomid + IUI. I know what you mean when you say 'it's getting realer'. My first ultrasound scan resulted in me having a total breakdown in the ultrasound room because it felt so overwhelming and unbelievable that I have to go through this to get pregnant. After the first scan and the first shot, I realized it actually wasn't that bad.