Feeling obsessed with TTC

[Decemberbride]

I feel on a mission

After getting pregnant in my first cycle off the pill, I'm dreading that it could take AGES to concieve again following my MC.

I finally plucked up the coutage to do a HPT at dinner which came up negative so it seems my hormones are back to normal (MC 13 days ago)
I also bought some OV tests and got a faint line but as it wasn't strong enough it's classed as a negative and have been reading up about CM.

I feel obsessed and instead of working, I'm reading every baby topic forum I can lay my mouse on! I have done no work today or yesterday - just surfed the wed for info on TTC and TTC after a MC.

I tried to initial sex last night and this morning but H has man flu and wants to give it a miss for a few days which upsets me as its a miss opportunity and I will be so depressed if AF comes!

Does anyone else feel obsessed?

 

[babyell]

Hi I know how u feel! I too got pregnant 1st cycle after implanon removal. When I lost harry all I could think about wad getting pregnant. Doing opks every day having sex every day over fertile period. Reading everything it was all I could think about, the urge seems to ware off after a while. This us my 3rd cycle since harry died, and hoping it will be this month as it is his due date soon. But having lots of pains so will have to see, fingers crossed for our bfp's!

 

[Nosy_Cow]

sorry for your loss honey!

I got pregnant on my 3rd cycle after coming off the pill. I couldn't believe it as we hadn't been trying that much! Then we lost Chloe in July 09.

We started trying again straight away and I've been obsessed with TTC ever since. It's so hard seeing my period show each month. I'm due on the 23rd and if I'm not pregnant this month I'm thinking of giving up and letting nature take it's course. It will happen when it happens I guess.

It's so hard not to try though.

 

[JCIC]

I understand to. I became pregnant straight away after coming off the pill and mc in november. Feels like all I do is think about being pregnant and then worry about whether it will stick if i am lucky again! I spend all my time reading forums to and looking for answers to my unanswerable questions! I'm also trying hard not to put that pressure on myself but as you all know it's easier said than done! x

 

[Beadette]

It sounds like I've just wrote this post! I too got preg in only my first proper cycle after coming off pill! I then mmc at 13 weeks and had an erpc on 8th jan. I spent hours looking on Internet about ttc. I'm tailing off a little now as I'm thinking that stress will make matters worse xx

 

[BabyC091109]

I'm so glad that I am not the only one who seems to be obsessed with wanting to be pregnant again. I came off the pill Aug 2008, but didn't start trying till March 2009 and the first month was when we fell with Baby Clark, who we then lost at 33 weeks. We're now moving on to our third cycle of trying and it is so frustrating that last time we fell so quickly and this time it's taking forever. I worry that there is something wrong inside following stillbirth x

 

[dollydingle]

Oh ladies it is good that everyone feels the same is it? It can feel so lonely after a loss. Everyone else's life returns to normal around you and you're left with a big hole that can only be filled by a baby.

I lost my first at 11 weeks in Aug 09. I too got preg straight off the pill.

It's now 6 months later. My cycles are still settling down. I might have ovulated this month for the first time but not sure!

Initially I desperately wanted to be pregnant again straight away and read EVERYTHING I could find internet-wise about miscarriage/statistics/ways to get fertile quicker/herbs/poas etc etc.

It has got better. I feel calmer for some reason this month. The pain is a bit less. I don't have that desperate feeling anymore. I have some peace that things will happen in their own time.

I think it is only time (and some BNB support!) that has given me this feeling.
The bfp will happen again and I'm sure healthy babies will follow for all of us but you can't force your body or the universe to do it quicker than when it's ready.

PS I still pee on sticks and monitor my CM so I'm not completely Zen about it all!!!

hugs and baby dust to all xx

 

[Decemberbride]

To all of us

I know it'll happen one day BUT I NEED it to happen now! I just feel helpless until it does and fustrated with myself about the MC! I cannot focus on ANYTHING else. I've written an email today in work which is allot more than I've done for the past 2 days!

Debating peeing on a stick again at dinner

We DTD or is it DB on here? Anyway we "did the deed" last night but after torturing myself watching One Born Every Minute I just wasn't in the mood, not because the labour stories put me off but because I longed to be in that situation. I know I'm going to turn into a auto-pilot baby making obsessive wife, and all the fun is going to go out of making love and it will just become a chore, which will push my H away. I remember last night half way through just thinking - please finish, I don't want the prolonged version, I just want your sperm and thats not a good place to be!

 

[JCIC]

Hi decemberbride

I think its still really early days for you and your hormones will be all over the place, mine still are and its nearly 3months since my mc. Its not good that you feel the way that you do but it is natural. I think that maybe you need some time off work and a break away for you and ur husband as you've both been through a heck of a lot. I totally get where you're coming from with wanting another baby but I think ur still grieving and need time to sort that out first x x

 

[TripleB]

To all of us

I know it'll happen one day BUT I NEED it to happen now! I just feel helpless until it does and fustrated with myself about the MC! I cannot focus on ANYTHING else. I've written an email today in work which is allot more than I've done for the past 2 days!

Debating peeing on a stick again at dinner

We DTD or is it DB on here? Anyway we "did the deed" last night but after torturing myself watching One Born Every Minute I just wasn't in the mood, not because the labour stories put me off but because I longed to be in that situation. I know I'm going to turn into a auto-pilot baby making obsessive wife, and all the fun is going to go out of making love and it will just become a chore, which will push my H away. I remember last night half way through just thinking - please finish, I don't want the prolonged version, I just want your sperm and thats not a good place to be!

I completely get where you are coming from decemberbride but please don't worry, its totally normal. It's 4 months for me since my MMC and I can honestly say I finally feel that I'm getting there (phew!). The first few weeks were hellish at work, I didn't achieve anything other than hours and hours on the internet trying to work out why MC had happened to me and how quickly I could get pregnant again. I convinced myself it would happen immediately and I think that made it harder on myself when it didn't. I found it incredibly hard to see anything baby-related - TV programmes, random babies in the street and worst of all, friends announcing pregnancies when I had lost mine. I am sure I was both depressed and manic about TTC again.

However, the last month I've really began to get a grip. I still get upset from time to time but I can now coo over babies and think - I'm going to get one of you soon - rather than feel the raw pain of loss. I am doing everything I can to get pregnant - charting, OPKs/CBFM etc. Initially I found that it really puts babysex in a different light - no fun at all (and like you thinking hurry up!). Now, I'm beginning to enjoy it again and am happy thinking that we could be making a baby.

Anyway, just wanted to say that there is little you can do to stop yourself feeling like this but also that there is hope and someday soon you'll be feeling more positive about things. Hoping for your BFP sooner rather than later, TripleB x

 

[Decemberbride]

Thanks JCIC we're actually going away this weekend and have 3 days off work next week so fingers crossed that will help!

Thank you

 

[JCIC]

I'm sure it will. It'll give you both the quality time that you need. Hopefully, the less stress and more time together will = BFP! x x

 

[Decemberbride]

just to add more stress - I just did my 2nd OPK and it's positive!

Now it really is a do the deed mission