Feeling so lost

[Morgan W]

Ok so here is my story,

I have been really excited and posting in the first trimester forums about being pregnant! I am 6 weeks an 2 days.
Well a few days ago my boyfriend and i split because of certain reasons. Lets just say i found some stuff out. Well since the split he has not been wanting to be involved at all he tells me he wants the baby but doesnt want to deal with me so I am considering adoption! I already have a 2 1/2 year old daughter whos father is not involved. My ex was a father to her which hurts me even more that she has to deal with the fact that he doesnt want anything to do with her.
He said he is fine with adoption and I am considering but i am so torn. I want this baby so bad but I dont think i can raise two kids alone! I am only 22. My mom would be extremely dissapointed. I am just so afraid of picking out a family and then when delievery day comes not being able to let go and hurt the family. It sounds selfish and thats the last thing i want to be. I have cried so many times! I just wish he wanted to be supportive regardless of our circumstances it would make things easier.

Im just so lost.

 

[Fliss]

Don't make your decision now sweetheart - your head is clearly still all over the place. You have time to make up your mind, and only you know what is right for you and your baby ok?

 

[Milty]

I would also like to point out most couples willing to adopt would not be upset with adopting a 1 week old baby if you know what mean...You could always contact an agancy and get info and even narrow down the couples with the knowledge that you won't decide or even make contact with possible parents until after the baby is born...

 

[charxxx]

I know exactly how you feel I was in a similar situation to you. I'm 20, Had my first child in a relationship which was violent and cruel at 17, therefore I ended up a single teen mum.

I then met my current partner two years later and I fell pregnant, it wasnt planned & I didnt feel the need to have a baby together because it was way too soon and my head was all over the place- like I'm sure yours is.

So I thought about adoption as the pregnancy was pushing me and my bf further and further apart and until I gave birth to her I was still considering it for the sake of my daughter and because I was certain the relationship was going to end.. But when I saw her little face and after I had worked so hard to make labour less stressfull for her by trying to stay calm I just couldnt and dont know how I ever considered it to be honest.

Sorry about the whole life story! lol, All I'm trying to say is you have the rest of 9 months to think ths over and if you have any doubts atall that dont go away or any little inckling telling you to keep your baby then listen to it hun before you make the choice.

And anyway- kids are pretty resiliant when it comes to change, My daughter has handled it really well and I have too as with second baby's you know whats what. And being a single mum is bloody hard, but at the end of the day being a parent is hard whether your with someone or not, Also if the relationship was causing you stress then it could even be easier on your own? As then you get "me time" When you've settled the kids without someone wanting you to do other thngs and getting on your nerves hehe

Whatever you do decide on I wish you luck & I do think that people who choose adoption are amazing, Just remember to take your time hun xx

 

[carolinaw]

Don't cry and make a decision now, Morgan. Fliss is right that You have time to make up your mind, and only you know what is right for you and your baby. Talk with him...

 

[JASMAK]

Reading your post I feel like I am hearing you wanting to do things because of other's actions. This should only be about you.

 

[1Kraftymom]

Morgan, don't even worry about that right now. You have 7 and a half beautiful months to consider all of the options. Right now the most important thing is to get plenty of rest and try not to stress. You CAN do anything you put your mind to. There are thousands and thousands of single moms out there that have 2, 3, 4+ children out there. Whatever you decide, there is support out there. Pregnancy is one of the most beautiful events in life so embrace it and enjoy it, as you have been graciously blessed with another little life.

 

[Eleanor ace]

Hello! My name is Stephanie and I am 27 years old. I am so sorry to hear about hter situation that you have found yourself in. May I ask what state you are in? My husband and I desperately want to adopt and would love to speak with you about your different options. I had ovarian cancer when I was 19, and now I am unable to have children.

From the forum rules: Solicitation or propositions of surrogacy, adoption or sperm donorship using the forums, private messages, or signatures features is strictly prohibited.
I'm sure this isn't what you were intending but your post did read a bit that way.
OP I'm sorry you're going through this. Whatever decision you make this LO will be loved- by you or by another family, and that's what matters. Take the time you need to make the best decision for YOU and your family. Good luck