Feeling trapped!

[leash27]

I have been successfully BF DD for almost 16 weeks now and I am happy to say that I do really enjoy it and I am fortunate enough to have nailed her latching early on and my supply has been great.

My problem is with her accepting a bottle, we are having a total nightmare and it is really stressing me out. We introduced a bottle at around 4 weeks and she took it no problem. Unfortunately, we have struggled ever since to encourage her to take it consistently and without a major battle beforehand. I had a night away a couple of weeks ago and she took less than 10 oz in almost 24 hours.

We have had a rough week with her sleeping and I have been up every 2-3 hours at night feeding her, this has really taken its toll and I have reached the point where I am crying because I am exhausted. I have the most amazing DH who wants to do all he can to help but what I need is quite simply just sleep which is impossible if she won't accept a bottle from him. He tried again this morning and she screamed blue murder until I came downstairs and fed her. Added to this, we have a weekend away planned next month for my best friends 30th birthday which is all booked and paid for. The plan was for my mum to look after the children from Friday lunchtime until Sunday morning. How can I realistically leave her knowing that she may not eat for 2 days?

I love BF, I honestly do but this has got so frickin hard and I am really starting to wonder if it has all been worth it? I go back to work in a few months and she will be in nursery 4 days a week. What on earth am I going to do??

X

 

[noon_child]

I have been successfully BF DD for almost 16 weeks now and I am happy to say that I do really enjoy it and I am fortunate enough to have nailed her latching early on and my supply has been great.

My problem is with her accepting a bottle, we are having a total nightmare and it is really stressing me out. We introduced a bottle at around 4 weeks and she took it no problem. Unfortunately, we have struggled ever since to encourage her to take it consistently and without a major battle beforehand. I had a night away a couple of weeks ago and she took less than 10 oz in almost 24 hours.

We have had a rough week with her sleeping and I have been up every 2-3 hours at night feeding her, this has really taken its toll and I have reached the point where I am crying because I am exhausted. I have the most amazing DH who wants to do all he can to help but what I need is quite simply just sleep which is impossible if she won't accept a bottle from him. He tried again this morning and she screamed blue murder until I came downstairs and fed her. Added to this, we have a weekend away planned next month for my best friends 30th birthday which is all booked and paid for. The plan was for my mum to look after the children from Friday lunchtime until Sunday morning. How can I realistically leave her knowing that she may not eat for 2 days?

I love BF, I honestly do but this has got so frickin hard and I am really starting to wonder if it has all been worth it? I go back to work in a few months and she will be in nursery 4 days a week. What on earth am I going to do??

X

Ok breathe!

1)OK your LO didn't take lots when you were away but she did take some (probably about 3 feeds worth). This means she doesn't like it but when she really needs it she keeps herself hydrated.
2) Bad sleep at 4months is a developmental stage which will pass. I can't promise she'll sleep through the night in a few weeks, but it is quite possible it'll become more manageable very soon.
3) Next month is a long time away in baby development terms and she may have totally changed her attitude to bottles by then. Also on the evidence of the time you went away recently she won't 'not eat' for 2 days, she just might not eat as much. Your Mum will (I'm sure) know what to do if LO actually refused all food and drink and started to get dehydrated. I mean even if she did take bottles well, if she caught a bug and threw up a lot of her feeds your Mum would have to deal with that situation wouldn't she?

In practical terms:
Does she react any differently to you giving the bottle vs other people?
Does she fuss even at the sight of the bottle or is it just the feel of the teet in her mouth?
Do you always give her a bottle in a location where you have also breastfed her?
Have you ever tried 'swapping' the nipple for a bottle in the middle of a sleepy feed/dream feed?

You need to look after yourself - take your DH up on his offer to help by spending the weekend in bed, getting DH to bring LO to you for feeds and then taking her away again so you can sleep, sleep, sleep.

 

[purplecupcake]

PP asked some good questions. Also, how often do you give a bottle? It would probably help to consistently give a bottle every day or every couple days so it becomes a predictable occurrence in her life. I also wouldn't give her the breast after she refuses a bottle as this teaches her if she cries long and loud enough, you will give in. Allow your husband to soothe her and try again. If she refuses 3 times, he can soothe her, then wait at least 30 minutes after her being calm to give her the breast so she doesn't make an association. You should not be offering a bottle when she's really hungry, so if she refuses waiting a while isn't a big deal.

If the bottle just won't work for you, you can teach her to cup feed.