feeling

[deanna_aird]

hi girls,

im pretty new to this site, and this is my first thread so here goes..

looking to see if anyone else is in the same boat as me..

im 31 weeks pregnant and for the last atleast 4 weeks my other half seems to have lost ALL interest in sex
saying hes scared hes going to hurt me..
now im at a loss as to what to do ive sugguested diff ways so he doesnt feel like hes lying on my bump..
but still NOTHING..
its really getting me down but the more i try to speak to him about it he just seems to be moody and not want to talk about it!!
a mean av heard of preggers ladies going off it but men is new to me!!

ahhh feel slightly better after my rant.. hope if anyone else is in the same boat this gives them reassurance as i feel so lonely about it all

 

[BabiNo2]

Some men consider a pregnant woman as untouchable/sacred and so are too scared to do anything. Why not just have a nice cosy night in with him then try and coax it along without being obvious. lol Or if it really is bothering you just speak to him and tell him its upsetting you.

 

[deanna_aird]

thanks babino2.. dont think my hormones are helping at the moment,
feeling sorry for myself over it haha!! how pathetic am i.. youd think it was the end of the world

 

[abc123x]

Hey hun :wave:

I wouldn't worry too much. Men can get very worried and anxious about sex when their OH is pregnant. It makes sense when you think of it this way: loads of women swear off sex as not to hurt their baby(especially at the beginning or at the end), so it makes sense that men do the same thing sometimes. Nobody wants something to go wrong and have to live with the guilt and grief, even if it isn't their fault.

I am sure he'll come around, just give him some time. Hopefully by the time that you're trying to use him to go into labor! lol.

 

[BabiNo2]

its understandable really, I think because we feel so big we want to know we are still attractive to our OH. Hope you feel better soon x

 

[kimber89]

god your lucky you havnt gone off it. i havnt been able to for weeks and its really annoying but i just cant get in the mood. i feel so sorry for my bf!
you just ned to make him realise the baby is protected and its completely safe to have sex during pregnancy.but sometimes imlike that myself i feel like im hurtng the baby even though i know its safe. just try talk to him

 

[Mummytobe85]

If it helps hun, just say that you'll go on top of him and if it gets too much for you/bubs gets squashed then stop altogether

But i agree with the other ladies, communication is the key

 

[MummyinJune]

Mine isnt the same but ive read that its v common 4 men to go off sex when ur preg 4 lots of diff reasons. Unfortunatly we r the opposite my OH still wants it all the time but im 2 tired and if not 2 tired its 2 sore and uncomfortable lol. U should just ask him y x

 

[PAgal]

I went through a phase like this with my OH, it really got me down, but he has been a lot better lately since I reassured him it won't hurt baby. Sex was just very awkward there for awhile, I could tell it was weird for him, so doggy style works the best for him---he loves it AND can do it without thinking about baby in there, so I recommend enticing him that way

 

[deanna_aird]

I went through a phase like this with my OH, it really got me down, but he has been a lot better lately since I reassured him it won't hurt baby. Sex was just very awkward there for awhile, I could tell it was weird for him, so doggy style works the best for him---he loves it AND can do it without thinking about baby in there, so I recommend enticing him that way

Thanks honey, yeh i think part of the problem may have to do with bubs kicking hard wenever we DTD..
i have tried to speak to him about it but he just gets grumpy and says he thinks hes hurting me even wen i reaasure him he isnt,
defo gona give this a try see if i have any luck..
just hate feeling like the only one interested esp when i feel HUGEEE lol!!

 

[Lettuce]

My DH has gone off sex, I haven't
He finally admitted t me it was the "3rd person in the room" thing, more than baby being hurt. Sex is such a psychological act that sometimes we must tread carefully! It does bother me, but I've got to live with it. Not even the promise of bringing on labour is working!! Haha.
Hopefully it'll all be ok once baby has arrived. Xxx

 

[deanna_aird]

My DH has gone off sex, I haven't
He finally admitted t me it was the "3rd person in the room" thing, more than baby being hurt. Sex is such a psychological act that sometimes we must tread carefully! It does bother me, but I've got to live with it. Not even the promise of bringing on labour is working!! Haha.
Hopefully it'll all be ok once baby has arrived. Xxx

Atleast i know its not only me then haha!!
feel like a sex pest or something these days!!
but hopefully all will be well once babas here wishing you luck to honey

 

[michelle1985]

i no how u feel me and my oh have had sex twice in my whole pregnancy and im nearly 27weeks i want it but he isnt interested he just says its not right doing it when im pregnant.

 

[deanna_aird]

i no how u feel me and my oh have had sex twice in my whole pregnancy and im nearly 27weeks i want it but he isnt interested he just says its not right doing it when im pregnant.

defo now how your feeling sweetie,
feels that long im starting to wonder how we got preggers in the furst place!! ahaa

i no thats a LARGE exageration but 4 weeks for me is a LONG time, god nos how your holding out

 

[Apricot]

My OH isn't interested anymore. He said it's not that he's not attracted to me but it just feels too weird to him.

I kind of understand what he means though so Im just holding off now, I think pressuring him will make it worse.

 

[CMarie]

I'm in a similar situation you're in, but thankfully both my DH and I have not been in the mood. The last time we dtd was back in March DH doesn't mind...if he's super in the mood I do other things to make him feel good, but I've just been unable to really think about sex when I know my little guy is on the way so soon!

The only advice I have is just to make sure you guys are talking about it. My DH and I were very intimate up until about 15 weeks and then it all went downhill...turned into once every 2 weeks, once a month, and now nothing! We talk really openly about it and like other girls have said, my DH just doesn't feel comfortable dtd with our son in my belly Not talking about it will only build resentment up between the both of you as well so make sure you're letting him know how you feel!

 

[PAgal]

Not talking about it will only build resentment up between the both of you as well so make sure you're letting him know how you feel!

So, so true!!

 

[Jodiez]

My OH was the same worried about hurting me for about a month after the last time we had sex it made my bump ache so he wouldn't touch me so I persuaded him it wasn't the sex that did it but the position, i was on top but the bounce made the bump ache (sorry for TMI) so tried spooning far better and were both happy!

 

[xcharx]

Aww babe he's probably just scared! Hope you can sort it out x