Fertility fears

[Lyra]

Does anyone else yet to conceive their first worry about infertility? It's always been one of my fears since I was a teen because I was morbidly obese (am not anymore). I was always very careful with birth control and have never had an 'accident' or the slightest hint of a positive hpt.

I feel so bad for the women in LTTTC and those with infertility as I understand completely the yearning to be a mother. I know it's silly but it's a niggling fear I always have in the back of my mind. I was talking about ttc with my girlfriends at work, who are all wonderful and very supportive but I was heartbroken to hear that out of 5 of them my age (26) or younger all had either had a full term pregnancy or a termination - a couple had more than 1!

I know sensibly that not everyone has an accidental pregnancy and most people are careful enough to use birth control but it seems like so many people get preg at the drop of their knickers and I'm terrified something, some how, will stop it happening for me.

I had severe morbid obesity until age 22 (350lbs +) and during this time had polycystic ovaries which thankfully resolved themselves when I lost the weight. I had no periods for 8 years until 2 months after I stopped Cerazette in Feb. I've not yet had a positive OPK but have detected LH on a few. I can't chart as I suffer from bad insomnia. On the plus side, I have had a pelvic ultrasound which showed normal healthy uterus and ovaries and my first post-pill period was normal, plus my BMI is now in a healthy range for ttc. I had fertility blood tests a couple of months ago which came back normal although ovulation was not detected.

I'm not thinking I AM infertile, but I can't get rid of the fear and want to know if I'm the only one. I honestly think I'll go in to shock when/if I get my first BFP as deep down I don't believe it will happen! Please someone tell me I'm not completely crazy?!

 

[TTC in Canada]

Hi Lyra! I'm glad I read your post, you're definitely not the only one out there that feels that way. I'm 31, TTC our first, overweight with PCOS. I had a chemical pregnancy when I was 25. Now that we're "trying" I feel so much stress and pressure that I'm just not going to be able to get pregnant. I have regular 28 day periods but don't know if I'm actually ovulating. If this month isn't our month, I might try the OPK's next month.

Try not to think too much about being infertile!

 

[TeddyBearPug]

your definitely not alone in your fears! i have always been afraid i would have trouble conceiving and i had no reason to worry!! Why do we do that to ourselves!! lol! Now i have been ttc for over a year now and its kind of like my worst fears coming to life. ugh. but we have to try and stay positive!!

 

[overthemoon]

I know exactly how you feel. Only with me, there have been quite a few times where my OH and I haven't used birth control and not once have I had an "accident". So it's really got me worrying, and I know it isn't him because he had his own "accident" with a girl a few years before we got together.

I want to be a mother so bad that not only do I worry about being infertile, I also worry about carrying a baby to full term, and I worry about SIDS. I have just heard so many horror stories and it terrifies me. I'm not sure I am strong enough to cope with it.

I will definitely go into shock when I finally get my BFP.

 

[Ifwisheswere]

You're most certainly not alone! I'm a couple of years older than you and it's something that bothers me a lot. I know that worrying doesn't help but I can't help it

 

[EngineerGirl]

I have that fear too. Especially when people around me like to share stories of others they know who had trouble conceiving or remind me that you shouldn't put it off too long (and I'm only 26!). We'll see how it goes with us TTC.

Here's hoping that all of us face our fears rationally and enjoy this process, ending with happy and healthy babies!

 

[emuuu]

I'm glad I saw this thread, Its good to know other people have fears about infertility too, I don't think I could share my history and my fears so openly but you have all really made me feel a little bit more normal and less crazy!! Here's to our first BFP's!!

 

[MarcsMrs]

You are not alone in feeling that way at all. It is always a worry at the back of my mind! DH & I are both 27, fit, healthy & active, now starting cycle 5 of TTC! Its a worry that I have always had due to many many surgeries over the years but I believe we need to think positive! Im also giving my body all the help I can in making sure it is in tip top shape for TTC! Taking my pre-natal vits, grapefruit juice, raspberry leaf tea & evening primrose tabs! DH is taking Zinc & Vit E for his swimmers too!!!

Lucky for me we have a very nice GP who said that if we get to 6 months TTC he will give us all the necessary tests! Praying we dont have to see him though!

 

[Lyra]

Phew, am sure glad to see I'm not the only one! I'm 26 (tomorrow's my birthday, lol) and my parents are desperate to be grandparents now I'm finally married! I know there's no real reason we shouldn't conceive but when it's so important....argh. I have a few friends who don't want children at all and I can't understand that mindset at all, it's a complete mystery to me. I can't see my life having purpose unless I'm someone's mummy. It really gets me how easily some people become pregnant and seems so unfair when I see some of the lovely ladies here who have had so much trouble conceiving or god forbid losing their much wanted babies and others can just get pregnant without trying.

Good luck to all of you, I'm sure it's just in our heads but the reality of it is conception is definitely not as easy as we were warned it was in school! Fingers crossed we all see those beautiful two lines soon

 

[overthemoon]

Phew, am sure glad to see I'm not the only one! I'm 26 (tomorrow's my birthday, lol) and my parents are desperate to be grandparents now I'm finally married! I know there's no real reason we shouldn't conceive but when it's so important....argh. I have a few friends who don't want children at all and I can't understand that mindset at all, it's a complete mystery to me. I can't see my life having purpose unless I'm someone's mummy. It really gets me how easily some people become pregnant and seems so unfair when I see some of the lovely ladies here who have had so much trouble conceiving or god forbid losing their much wanted babies and others can just get pregnant without trying.

Good luck to all of you, I'm sure it's just in our heads but the reality of it is conception is definitely not as easy as we were warned it was in school! Fingers crossed we all see those beautiful two lines soon

Happy birthday! I know what you mean about your life not having purpose if you aren't someone's mother. I feel exactly the same.

 

[FrenchyMummy]

Lucky you! we went to our GP after 7 months of TTC, and they said "can't do anything, it hasn't been a year yet". Didn't find it supportive in the slightest! I had also gone and asked teh same GP about pre-conception counselling as I was worrying about genetic defects on my side of the family and was told that she wasn't prepared to test my if I had all the information (not really possible for me to get ALL the info as I don't speak to that side of the family).
Grrrrrrrrrrr! I guess I am still angry now, hence the rant, sorry!
Either way, nice to hear that there are nice GP's out there!

 

[FrenchyMummy]

Was talking to MarcsMrs, I am new here! Sorry for highjacking the thread!

 

[MarcsMrs]

Happy Birthday Lyra! I know exactly how you feel xxx
My little sister has an 18month old "happy accident" & my parents are DYING for another grandchild! Lucky for me that my parents are super supportive & my mum has been researching natural ways to aid conception!! She is also convinced that since Ive given up my job that I will soon be pregnant.....the stress wasnt helping at all (didnt choose to leave though....was badly bullied so had to leave)

We all need to keep up the positive mental attitude though girls.....positivity works wonders xxxxxxxxxx

Good Luck to all TTC xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx