Finding myself afraid to be in my own home

[Welshcob]

Dear Cyber friends

You know I went to court last Friday. I was lucky because I just made an agreement not to contact FOB. Which was fine as I had not contacted him since the 14th and all of the 8 texts I sent between the 20th April and 14th May were just asking what was going on and not understanding why he had cut contact, as well as two inviting him to the scan and some just saying I missed him. I have kept these. Anyway, it was quite traumatic. Now I thought I would be relieved its over...but I know its not over, hes planning this taking the baby away or proving me an unfit mother.
So I need now...in order to protect myself against false allegations to keep notes of where I am and at what times. Thats fine...but I realised that he knows very well that I go to bed early and he is allowed to come and see me. So all he needs do is drive over and see my car there, then go home and say I bothered him - which would have SERIOUS consequences for me. So ever since Friday I can't sleep, I am afraid to be alone as I cannot corroborate where I am. I know this is what he would do too! It may not be now, but, later when I maybe have dropped my guard. I am even thinking of moving to hide from him! I am so afraid. I called the Police DV unit and left a message, thinking that I could ask them to tag me...then they know exactly where I am...just for my own protection. I know I probably am being paranoid, but he is capable of anything and I am petrified!

 

[xJG30]

Is there no where else that you can park your car or have a friend stay over? even just have their car on your drive, that way it might look like your not alone

 

[edinsam]

aw hun I cant imagine what terror you are going through. Do you have any hols left to take? Could you not get away for a while somewhere to give yourself a breather? Is there anyone who could also come and stay with you? I know my first few weeks I had a friend staying with me permanently...

Hate that you are having to go through this!

 

[Tigger Momma]

I am so sorry to hear that, If I were you I would try my best to move and get a restraining order and say that I feel unsafe, If you can't sleep that does mean that he is making you feel unsafe. Do you think that this would help you feel better, This way, he couldnt come to your home unannounced and you can also get friends and family to attest to you health also.

 

[Welshcob]

I think I need to move. I think also that I need to change my name. I need to do all I can to protect this baby. Well and me... as I am getting more and more distressed. I am away for a short while this weekend. Thank goodness as it gives me time to be away, to feel safe and to know that if he alleges anything, I have a concrete alibi. The thing that frightens me is that he will come back. He will do something. I don't know what and I don't know when. I am seeing Midwife tonight and so I will tell her how I am feeling. I was offered to go into a refuge, but this will not protect me for ever!! This will only protect me for a short while. I just want to disappear with my baby! I don't feel protected by law at all. He uses this against me. The worst bit is it is me suffering and he is fine as he is....he is not suffering at all. I am the one sitting here afraid all the time and wanting to run...run anywhere! Just to get away so he never finds us!!! Never!!

 

[starbucks101]

Hey, have you spoken to the DV team yet?

Get yourself a cctv system and then if he turns up you'll see him first. You shouldnt have to move.