First cycle after a loss.

[motherofboys]

I had my first loss at the end of September. I had all the signs of ovulation around the 13th of this month, and as I previously had a short lp I am expecting af any time from today onwards.
How did everyone cope at this point? I know the witch is going to get me but I don't think I can bare it. I just keep thinking that I should be pregnant. I was doing much better, but I didn't bleed much with the miscarriage and the idea of a full on period and going back to that waiting and hoping every month is so hard.
I heard a teeny baby crying when I was shopping today, and it mixed my feelings up so much

 

[dan-o]

to you xx

I've always found it bittersweet as it's a fresh start after the actual loss, hormones are reset and a slightly increased chance of falling pregnant again... but at the same time awful as it galvanises the fact that I'm no longer pregnant.

So sorry for your loss, I do hope your little rainbow is coming along very soon xx

 

[motherofboys]

After cramping on and off all day it would seem things are starting. 12dpo, exactly as they were before my last pregnancy and so confirming that I did ovulate when I thought. I suppose at least everything is still doing what its supposed to be. I was worried I'd just go weeks with no ov, or that my lp would be too short (i had that before ds4)

 

[Lawes1987]

I had my 3rd loss in April and I haven't started trying again yet. Its important to give your body a break and your mind to. The 2WW stuff every month is absolutely draining.

Your body takes a while to heal, I thought of my periods as a way of my body clearing out the bad and getting back to normal and healing. Dont tie negative associations to them, tie positive ones. Periods mean healing, out with the bad and in with the new and that you are healthy and things are working as they should.

I cried a lot at the beginning, so many pregnancy announcements came within a fortnight of my loss and I just cried and cried. But I was allowed, nobody knows how you feel and nobody can tell you how to grieve or for how long. You deal with it however you need to, counselling, the support of friends and family, keeping busy.

Its normal to be upset, its normal for ovulation and periods to become negative events you resent and dread. But they are good. They mean healing and renewal and things working as they should. Take a break, enjoy Christmas and don't stress yourself too much.

My body took months to get back to normal and it should, its not an easy experience, mentally or physically. Good luck babe x

 

[motherofboys]

Thanks. I've since had my 2nd period and now dh is having surgery next week so will be a few months until we can get back to trying.