Follow up apt tomorrow

[superp123]

I'm just going through my day today, wondering what the heck is wrong with me. Took me nearly half the day to realize that I prob just have the gitters for my apt tomorrow.
I'm not even sure exactly the tests we did run, as the whole experiance just seems like a dream at this point. I'm just hoping that we find some answers so that we can make a plan and move forward. I so want to TTC asap. Although, I'm a little afraid they're going to just say try again. I'll just die I swear, or at least break down. Don't know if I'm strong enough for that... At least not yet.
Plus, maybe TMI but I haven't had sex since May 2nd. The first two weeks DH and I were on break...oversexed due to TTC. Then before we knew it "oh lets wait and make sure things are good at first early scan, pelvic rest." then "oh, lets put you on pelvic rest now, absolutely no sex until we see you next" and then finally, "oh, wait two weeks till your follow up nothing in there ya know." I swear if my doc puts me on pelvic rest again I'll be climbing the walls. I'll have to move in with my MIL or something cause I can't even stand to be near him right now. Oi! Talk about sexual frustration. Hey? LOL
Anyway, little anxious about my visit tomorrow. I have to wait till 3pm. Send me some calming patience dust people.

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[NeyNey]

Oh honey Big hugs for you for tomorrow. I hope it goes well, and I hope you get the answers and help you're looking for.

 

[Frankie]

Hope it goes well for you x

 

[NikiJJones]

Sending you for tomorrow.
xxxx

 

[Loo]

Fingers (and toes) all crossed for you
x

 

[superp123]

Well girls the good news is no medical reason for my mc was found. The bad news is no medical reason was found for my mc. I know I should be more relieved that nothing is the matter with me. But at least if there were I wouldn't feel so helpless and guilty.. or would I? Probly huh. I guess I was hoping for a magic formula to make things right and turns out there isn't one. Crap! Again, we'll just have to give it another shot and roll the dice again. No different from the last two times. It's just finding the currage to start again.
I think doc picked up on my need to have baby asap... as he made another comment about waiting to be mentaly ready to go through this again and how important that month or two can be. I just feel like given the situation what is the difference? Obviously give myself the next cycle just to be able to temp again but it could be months again before we land another BFP... why waste time. Last time it took me three years to pluck the currage to TTC again. This time I don't feel like I have three years. I dunno. Just using you guys for a sounding board again.
Besides I haven't even 'broke the seal yet'!! LOL Maybe that's my issue, I need to get some.
Thanks girls again for your support and compasion. I'm off to pamper myself in a LONG AWAITED hot bath. This I am excited for.

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[NikiJJones]

If you feel that you are ready to try again next cycle then go for it, or if you don't feel ready then give it a while. We are all different, and I hope that you find the strength to get through the TTC when that is what you decide to do.
For me one of the painful things has been going back to the agony of TTC, and the disappointment when AF arrives. I wish there was some way someone could wave a magic wand for us and ease that agony.
Sending you hugs and I hope you enjoy(ed) your hot bath. It's on of the first things I did when I found out my LO was gone.
xxxx

 

[NickyT75]

Just wanted to give you a petal xx

 

[Rumpskin]

 

[Farie]

thinking of you

 

[superp123]

Thanks again girls.
Maybe TMI... Well DH and I got right to it and I have to say that I feel so much better already. I was a little scared to be honest, kinda like the first time. I gave him very clear instructions not to break 'it'. Things are good in that department, three times in 24hrs I think we're over it already. LOL
Not sure about when to TTC again, I think I'll be jumping back into it after first AF. I can't wait. Like you said Niki its the agony of waiting every month thats got me too. I can't stand the thought of waiting and waiting and waiting. Better just to start and get on with it. The odds of DH and I falling pg the first month are pretty slim any way. If it happened that would be amazing but if not at least we're over the hump. I think I'll just dive right in. We'll see what the DH has to say about it... when I brought it up the other day, he seemed to think we should follow docs advice. Dunno.
Lots of
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[shmoo75]

Oh hun. I am so sorry for your losses I am glad that you want to get back to TTC and I have my fingers crossed that you get a and it is a sticky one for you