For those diagnosed as "unexplained infertility".....

[beemeck]

Hi ladies!

March has marked a year since we began our TTC journey and I have not been the most patient person about it all. We did get pregnant on our first try and suffered through a very complicated and rare cervical ectopic pregnancy. We were given the green light to begin TTC again in July, so technically it has not been a full year of sex since THEN with no bfp.

I've heard varying information regarding when to seek help but Taking Charge of Your Fertility really resonated with me. The author does advocate seeking answers if a year has gone by without a sustainable pregnancy - that although fertilization may not be the problem, something else might be.

I kind of had to cry to my doc last month to get me an HSG ordered for this month. This morning I had my post HSG follow up and my goal was to have another step in place. Thus far, I've only received a random blood test when I went in complaining of some hormonal issues in October. The blood test was performed that day which was CD 9 so it wasn't any official CD 3 or 21 bloodwork.

My appt was so frustrating. of course my doc wanted to tell me that I've only been trying since July and that it'll happen. The first time I fell pregnant was our first try, but she said that doesn't matter. my concern is that perhaps something is wrong that an egg is not even able to implant in my uterus since obviously that's never occured for me. or if something happened post traumatic, life threatening pregnancy that changed things. I feel frustrated because they basically have the random blood test and an clear HSG and yet feel confident telling not only that EVERYthing is fine but that it WILL happen.

I just didn't feel like that was the case. Aren't there many people who have all tests come back normal and still don't fall pregnant? or am I being too impatient?

I asked for an SA for my DH which she was very reluctant to give since (you guessed it) we have gotten an egg fertilized. A woman I am friends with on another thread had her DH come back with a really, really bad SA and they basically said IUI was pointless but that they would try it once. well guess what? it worked! because it only takes one. so perhaps my DHs SA isn't good and one really lucky one just happened to make it the first time. isn't that worth finding out? (she did write the script)

I just want to know what others were told when everything was checking out but no baby was happening. She made me feel odd. She said she would give me the RE referral but that it would be really invasive and maybe for no reason. It's not like I DESIRE medical intervention but she made me feel like I was a weirdo or hyperchondriac. I just want to be proactive. Since July, I have tried everything there is to try - RRLL tea, prenatals, vitex, maca, b12, fertility yoga, acupuncture, charting, temping, opks, softcups, preseed.....! can't I get more tests done? day 3 and 21 bloodwork? (I worry about low progesterone due to pre AF spotting), and ultrasound, anything??

any input is appreciated !! I made the appt with the RE for when AF will be due this month, I just don't know if I should feel silly about it....? I guess my question is when and how did it go from - everything is fine, it will happen, to it's time to do something about this?

 

[KatO79]

I think your GP sounds very condescending, to tell someone that's been trying for 1 year that it'll happen is just BS, even if you did once get a fertilised egg. She doesn't sound like she has any understanding of infertility, I'm guessing she had an easy time getting pregnant herself if she has kids? It sounds like she's trying to talk you out of getting a referral for some reason. Is it possible to switch GPs and find someone that takes you more seriously? I wouldn't feel comfortable having her as my GP after that if it were me.

My GP is a jerk in another way. We talked to him after 8 months of nothing happening and he told us point blank he found it highly unlikely we'd get pregnant on our own and offered to refer us then and there. DH and I stupidly decided to give it another month or two, nothing happened and I contacted him to ask him for that referral. He then became a stickler and said that he couldn't refer us until after 12 months so we needed to try for 2-3 months more and that he never said he could refer us before then Finally did get the referral after the 12 month mark and was referred for testing by the clinic we chose (since our GP refused to refer me for CD3 hormone testing like he should've, he claimed it "wasn't (his) job" despite the clinic saying otherwise). I had clear tubes at my HSG and my CD3 blood work was fine, DH's SA came back on the lower side of normal. My RE felt we had a really good chance of IUI working yet we ended up doing 6 IUIs with no luck But they do allow for there may be an unknown issue with me/us, something they just can't test for. IVF ended up being the way to go for us.

You're not silly at all for talking with a RE and getting testing done. They do say that if nothing has happened for 1 year, then you need to get you and your DH tested.

 

[beemeck]

thanks kat - this made me feel better. I guess obgyns aren't specialized in fertility and I need to remind myself that. She really had succeeded in making me feel foolish yesterday but your response and some other ladies have made me feel better. I'm just going to see the RE, talk to her, have her LISTEN and maybe run a few non-invasive tests for now. My obgyn made me seem like I was wanting to get IVF tomorrow and even talked about the "hyperovulation" that they do at "places like that". I can go there without going from 0-100 and I feel so much better today.

Appt is in place for March 22

 

[KatO79]

FXed your appointment goes well

 

[Lues]

I would say to completely ignore your GP. They know nothing about fertility (well most anyway). It's actually pretty shocking how little even OBGYNs know about fertility. Mine was worse than useless and she's a WONDERFUL gyno in general

You should absolutely not feel silly about your appointment. If your RE makes you feel silly at all... find a new RE. (immediately! once you start doing things with one, even just tests, it can be overwhelming to switch)

Not EVERYTHING is super invasive. There are some well timed blood tests that you can get which can be helpful (especially to test for progesterone as you said. Three years TTC before I got my sticky baby ... I'm six months preggo now, yippie!!! and I believe progesterone was 90 percent, or more, of my issue)

I wish I had gone to get help sooner. I think you are brave for being willing to address the issue. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Be prepared for a potentially overwhelming appointment. But remind yourself that every situation is different and that just by being there, you're taking the next step on whatever YOUR personal journey is to getting pregnant.

Good luck

 

[PhotoPassion]

I think I'm in a similar situation. We were NTNP for 8 months before I got pregnant. I found out at 10 weeks that it was a blighted ovum and had a D&C. We've been actively trying since July now as well. I get spotting up to 5 days before my period and I'm worried that's an indication of a problem since the only times I've been pregnant I haven't had any spotting. I've been thinking about going to the doctor to at least address the spotting but I keep trying to hold out a little longer. I keep trying to add a new herb or something every month to feel like I'm trying something new but nothing has made much of a difference.

Just wanted to let you know you aren't the only one! I might hold out a few more months, but I think I'll most likely be heading to the doctor soon as well. Good luck!

 

[beemeck]

I would say to completely ignore your GP. They know nothing about fertility (well most anyway). It's actually pretty shocking how little even OBGYNs know about fertility. Mine was worse than useless and she's a WONDERFUL gyno in general

You should absolutely not feel silly about your appointment. If your RE makes you feel silly at all... find a new RE. (immediately! once you start doing things with one, even just tests, it can be overwhelming to switch)

Not EVERYTHING is super invasive. There are some well timed blood tests that you can get which can be helpful (especially to test for progesterone as you said. Three years TTC before I got my sticky baby ... I'm six months preggo now, yippie!!! and I believe progesterone was 90 percent, or more, of my issue)

I wish I had gone to get help sooner. I think you are brave for being willing to address the issue. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Be prepared for a potentially overwhelming appointment. But remind yourself that every situation is different and that just by being there, you're taking the next step on whatever YOUR personal journey is to getting pregnant.

Good luck

This was such a helpful message, lues! Thank you! It's so funny because I was thinking the same thing once my packet from the fertility clinic came in the mail. It's like 12 pages to fill out for both DH and I and it made me realize how little my obgyn even asked or knew about. I think she only asked the length of my cycles and the rest of the info I volunteered. I am no longer feeling silly in my quest to get answers but boy did she do a good job of convincing me I was foolish.

CONGRATS on your pregnancy!!! I love hearing stories like yours. I worry too that it's something so minor and a little tweaking is all I need to do the trick. I mean that would be amazing and that's why I'm getting help, I just mean that I worry if I was to wait so long just to find that it could have been helped right away.

I totally want to start with some less invasive tests and I'm sure that's the natural way it goes anyway. Less than a week to go now!

 

[beemeck]

I think I'm in a similar situation. We were NTNP for 8 months before I got pregnant. I found out at 10 weeks that it was a blighted ovum and had a D&C. We've been actively trying since July now as well. I get spotting up to 5 days before my period and I'm worried that's an indication of a problem since the only times I've been pregnant I haven't had any spotting. I've been thinking about going to the doctor to at least address the spotting but I keep trying to hold out a little longer. I keep trying to add a new herb or something every month to feel like I'm trying something new but nothing has made much of a difference.

Just wanted to let you know you aren't the only one! I might hold out a few more months, but I think I'll most likely be heading to the doctor soon as well. Good luck!

hi photo! wow, our situations do sound similar in terms of timing for sure. and this pre-AF spotting. It drives me nuts - just seems like such a clear indicator of something being off, yet my obgyn shrugs it off COMPLETELY. before my pregnancy and loss, I never spotted even the night before AF. And then up to 4 days leading up to it?? I think the mere fact that something changed that drastically is enough to look into. Did you have spotting prior to the loss?

I actually got really frustrated with my obgyn for not helping me with it and took matters into my own hands. I started acupuncture (after hearing it could help with end of cycle spotting) and it did the trick! the past 2 months, I've just spotted the night before AF.

Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone. that always helps! keep me posted on your journey - we can go through it together!

 

[PhotoPassion]

I think I've had spotting since I stopped birth control about 3 years ago. I honestly can't remember if I had it before birth control. I did have it before the loss but I feel like it's gotten worse.

That's awesome the acupuncture seemed to make a difference for you. Is there a specific type that you get? I'm ready to try almost anything at this point!

I do fear I might have endo because I had a lot of symptoms when I was younger, but it seemed to go away with birth control. My mom had a serious enough case she had to get surgery for the pain

I've also been trying to improve my diet some lately and have added baby aspirin as my newest pill to try. Who knows if it really makes a difference but it's nice to feel like there's something I can try.

Good luck at your doctor appointment! I actually can't wait until I get to start investigating this too. Hopefully they find something that's an easy fix. Or maybe you'll get your BFP first

 

[mrs.green2015]

Bee- Did you ever get an appointment or referral to a RE? My first appointment is tomorrow. All pre-testing has been done (blood, SA, and HSG). It took awhile for me to get referred, I switch doctors a lot and finally found one I love and it was actually get idea to send me.

 

[beemeck]

Hi Mrs. Green! Good to see you but sorry that you are still in the ttc part of this journey is your appt with the ob or re? My appt was just yesterday and I posted a long post about it in my journal today if you wanna sneak a peek! The ob was so reluctant to refer me but the re welcomed me with open arms and praised me on investigating and pushing - especially with getting the hsg done which she said I should have had right after my stitches healed up from the cervical ectopic. So you can check out my journal post - things are moving fast. I'm staring femara next week and having and iui done second week of April ! Basically scheduled that with no questions asked - so easy! Nervous and excited both good luck to you too and keep me posted !

 

[mrs.green2015]

That's amazing how fast it's going. So happy for you! I'll go take a look at your post.
My appointment is with my RE. Any advice for the first appointment?

 

[beemeck]

Yay !! Maybe we will be iui buddies ! I started an April group today - no takers so far lol. I guess just the basics - know what questions you have. We had so much time to just sit and talk about everything and anything. It was so different from the ob. I wrote down my questions and I actually had printed my ff charts too. I guess I was so used to trying to "prove" my dedication or timing with the ob because she was interested in them but didn't feel like she needed them to believe me. I guess just talk with dh before visit and see what page each of you is on because like I said (and everyone else told me too) it moves fast ! It was like if you're okay with a higher chance of multiples, let's do this. So I was glad for example that dh and I discussed that as well as other possibilities too so that we were able to consent to the plan right then and there as opposed to going home and discussing

 

[mrs.green2015]

Thanks so much. I'll definitely join your group because even if we don't do iui we'll be doing something and it'll be nice to have a buddy in the infertility world.
DH and I have talked about some of the options and he basically is good to go with anything it takes to get me pregnant! Lol