formula without guilt - help !

[grace10209]

Hi All
My daughter was born at 34.2 on Sept 1st, and spent 10 days in the nicu. I have been exclusively breastfeeding and she is S L O W L Y gaining weight.
The pediatrician seems pleased with her progress but I am not........

Today, which happens to be her due date, she was 5lbs 10oz. per the visiting nurse. So she is almost 6 weeks old and still only 5lb 10oz.
this seems low to me.

Plus, i really don't like breastfeeding and i hate pumping! i have to pump 4x per day and i just hate it. I am struggling and want to switch to formula 100%. My DH does two feedings per day - he gives her pumped breastmilk at 730p with her vitamin and then the 12midnight feeding. Now the pediatrician suggested at our last visit that DH add serving of formula to the two breastmilk bottles she is getting each day, so we started that a few weeks ago and its going well.

But lately, after most feedings, she acts like she is hungry again within 10 minutes. I bf for about 30 minutes total and she usually is asleep by the end, but then when i go to put her down - she starts crying and fussing and acting hungry, doing all the hunger cues.

part of me really wants to just stop breastfeeding and give her formula 100% of the time, i think she will gain more weight faster AND she will be more satisfied after eating.......

BUT i feel a huge amount of guilt even thinking this way. 1) she was a preemie and 2) they push breastfeeding and say how its soooooooo much better for babies then formula.

Can someone tell me that if we switch to all or mostly formula that its ok? can someone share their experience with their baby that they gave formula to and the baby was just fine?

I need to feel better about this. I want to stop pumping, i want my little girl to gain weight and thrive, formula just seems like a good solution but im so afraid.

 

[jandksmommy]

All mine ended up being formula fed. I managed to pump enough for my 23 weeker for the first 2 months but then dried up completely. Once on formula, she gained so much faster!

I think breastfeeding is awesome for those who can do it but I couldn't and my babies are all healthy and active. If you feel the need to go the formula route, for whatever reason, do not feel bad about it! It does not make you less of a mommy and your little one will be just fine on formula. Besides, you have already provided her with the benefits of breastmilk through her most crucial time. If she is tolerating the formula already, the switch will be easy for her

Hope I helped take away the guilt

 

[grace10209]

Thanks so much - it helps. We go to pediatrician on oct 31, I think I'll hang on til then but tell him at that appt that I want to go 100% formula, that will give her 8 weeks of bf and gives me some light at the end of the tunnel.

That sound ok?

 

[jandksmommy]

Sounds like a good plan! Just don't let anyone (including the doctor) bully or guilt you into continuing to breastfeed if you really feel you need to stop. You are the mommy and you know what is best for you and your baby. Good luck... and everything is going to work out

 

[rbourre]

I pumped for 6 months but started introducing formula after 4 months. It would have been earlier but I had quite a bit of frozen milk. She gained faster on formula and it saved my sanity. I was miserable pumping 6-8x a day. We went to see a lactation consultant a couple of times before giving up pumping and attempting to breastfeed. I was much happier to enjoy the time with my daughter and not my pump. 15 minutes each time, 6-8 times per day plus clean up and sterilizing was just too much for me.

My daughter was 5lbs 10oz on my due date too and only 17". She's now 13 months and around 18 pounds and 28".

 

[Fleur29]

My 34+4 preemie was exclusively ff. she is nearly 2 and absolutely thriving - she put on weight really well after her scbu stay and we haven't ever really looked back. Many of her exclusively bf non-preemie friends have allergies/asthma type illnesses, so go figure. I think you have a good plan of action but please please if you feel you need to stop before the appt then do it. There is no shame in ff (shoot me now, breast feeding brigade, I don't care!) and you know your baby best so do as YOU want not what you feel pressured into because of society/other people etc etc.

Good luck! Xx

 

[TheNewMrsB]

On the Transitional Care ward out of the 3 of us one little boy went on to formula, the little girl went on to formula because her mum was struggling and my son stayed breastfed. All were mums choice and we were all supported.

I don't think anyone should judge a mother on how she feeds her baby. If you feel that your daughter would benefit from formula then do it.

 

[grace10209]

Thanks all
For sharing and the support - it really helps

 

[Foxybabyhg3]

I'm doing a bit of all 3, she BF's, I express and make up the short fall with Caprilon. I guess it works for me as I've been doing so long I have a routine going. Do whatever works for your peace of mind and for what's best for your LO.

 

[DonnaBallona]

I think you should do what YOU think is best.


I had a similar story with my daughter, she was born at 32+5 and didn't thrive at all on breast milk. I carried on and carried on and carried on, desperate to breast feed her myself but it was so obviously not working for her. She came home at 6 weeks old weighing only 3lb 7oz. I continued to beat myself up and try for another 3 weeks before giving up and put her onto formula.

Best decisions I ever made about her care. she went from a grizzly, poorly, underweight baby to a fab sleeper, happy calm little baby and was an absolute joy. she still struggled to gain weight as quickly as I thought she would but she still followed her 'line' on the charts.

Be confident you're making the right decision for her and for you. your supply will drop if you're stressed out too. Go easy on yourself. you're doing a great job! xx

 

[sbl]

I agree with pp do what you think is the right thing. Don't feel pressured into anything.
I ff my lo from day one and she did just fine.
5lbs 1oz at birth and now a big and bold 23lb 10 month old