Friends...

[vhal_x]

Has anyone else had the same experience as me, where your friends have turned into complete A-holes since you've been pregnant?

First of all, they were fine - not overjoyed, but fine with the situation.

I was really ill at the start of my pregnancy up until only a few weeks ago, and every time they asked me to go out with them I couldn't due to being exceptionally ill.

I don't mean ill as in hospital or anything, just extreme morning/noon/night sickness, and an extreme case of fatigue (I literally could not be bothered getting out of bed at all some days).

Due to this, I didn't have my mobile on me a lot as it was usually off or attached to my dock, and therefore any texts I received were often not replied to, or replied to extremely late.

This caused my friends to go crazy, claiming I was ditching them - and then led them to all bitch about me behind my back, and I don't know if you've ever seen two girls and a gay guy bitch, but it can get pretty mean. (It was all over facebook hence how I knew the bitching was going on).

They then demanded that I go out more, and apologize for the lack of communication on my part. I simply explained that I'd come out when I could, as I'm still really tired, but I'm in the middle of decorating - and also the fact that I live 20 miles away (with no car) from them - it's rather difficult. I then apologized for my lack of replies, but explained that it will no doubt still happen as I have far more to be thinking about than my bloody phone .

Now they bitch about me pretty obviously on bebo and facebook, so I've decided that I don't need them in my life anymore as all the bitching and drama is getting pathetic.

I did one of those silly blogs on bebo where you answer questions and one was something like "If you could, would you change the people in your life?" and my reply was something along the lines of "No, because I have all I need in my life, Allan and my unborn son" to which I then noticed them bitch about on their pages.

"Lauren.

aww babe aslong as I'm with you I'm the happiest person in the world

love you & mini me so much

xxxxxxxx

1 day ago
---------------------------------
Lauren.

omg that's actual pathetic Richard

I'm abandoning you cause I've already got everyone I need


babe xxxxxxx"

---------------------------------

F*ck them basically, I really don't need all their sh*t.

I was just wondering if anyone else's friends are as f*cked up as mine...

Rant over

 

[Becca19]

the "friends" that i had before don't even know that im pregnant because they were so two faced to begin with they decided they were too goo for me and stopped talkin to me before i even found out. I only have two friends that know my situation and even they aren't always the greatest friends...You're not alone though i think it kind of comes with the territory you dont need drama

 

[vhal_x]

Yeah they just all kind of turned on me, so now I'm not even bothering to make an effort with them.

Tbh, my OH's friends have been much nicer than my now-old friends were.

All I really have now is my OH and my family and his family, and a select couple of his friends. But the only person I'm really close to is my OH. Of course I'm close to my mum and stuff, but there's things I'd rather tell him than tell her iykwim

 

[Becca19]

Yeah i think its some what immaturity on their part, but who knows. I'm only really close to my fiancee and my dad. You dont need a million friends and plus you will find new ones, i know a few people i used to go to school with who have kids now.

 

[emmylou209]

people on her are my only friends really other than my OH but i have scan n bump pictures on facebook and only had coments of family or neighbors my closest friend at school only found out cz i asked which name they prefered thinking they knew

but hey yh f*** them ur baby is the most important person in ur life now

 

[RachelRae]

I've definately lost some friends over pregnancy, OH has always been there though.

Just hang in there, once LO is here they won't matter.
Forget them.
xx

 

[vhal_x]

Yeah they've pretty much shown their true colours now. My OH went mental when he saw that they had been bitching about me and he wanted to confront them, and I told him to ignore it as I don't need any more drama, so he didn't say anything to them but updated his status thing to something along the lines of "people need to either grow up or get shot" and I've just went on my page and noticed that they've further bitched saying

"Oh we mustn't leave the house this week incase we get shot"
"No, we must never leave the house for months incase we hurt ourselves" (that's a dig at me).

and lastly,

"Oh, how I wish I knew what fresh air was like as I've not left the house in months" (another dig at me).

Funnily enough, I'm out all the time now, just not with them since, frankly, they're not worth my time anymore.

 

[Sophiiie]

They sound pathetic and immature, you definitely don't need people like that in your life!
I've lost a lot of friends during my pregnancy, but the way I look at it is that I'm gaining the single most important person in my life..my LO xx

 

[vhal_x]

Yeah, I know what you mean, all I need is my LO and my OH, and of course my family, they've been great. I'm just glad that other people can see that they're the ones in the wrong, because in their eyes, I'm the one that is in the wrong. I guess they're just not the 'good friends' I once thought they were.

Thanks to everyone for all the support and stuff. You've really helped me calm down haha. Thank God that this site is here, I think I may have gone crazy if I hadn't discovered it

xx

 

[lushious09]

its what happens... their too immature to understand... cant say i have had this problem both sets of male and female friends of mine have been extremely supportive and brilliant... but im a fair bit older then you so its not as much a taboo ... i would concentrate on your pregnancy and maybe make friends with people who are in a similar bout to you

 

[vhal_x]

its what happens... their too immature to understand... cant say i have had this problem both sets of male and female friends of mine have been extremely supportive and brilliant... but im a fair bit older then you so its not as much a taboo ... i would concentrate on your pregnancy and maybe make friends with people who are in a similar bout to you

Yeah, I'm just glad I have my OH as he's been there from day one, and is extremely protective of me and our LO (as LO has been brought into the drama a fair few times).

And I'm grateful for the support that being a member of BnB gives you, without BnB, I'd not have a chance to talk to anyone in similar situations as me so it has honestly been a godsend

 

[dizzy65]

 

[saraxx]

Just recently ive been saying to my other half. that i seem to be being dropped by my friends, now the baby is due, they dont really wana no. Not one of them has even asked about the baby and im a week overdue we all live in the same village, and i said to him i just feel im loosing my friends, they all go cinema and down the pub and i dont get an invite (i only drink coke downthere) but its just for the socialisin you know.. seems to be getting left out abit now.

 

[pinkribbon]

I'm SO lucky my best friend has 2 kids herself and had her 1st at 17 so she's been super supportive. Unfortunately I don't get to see her loads cause she doesn't live too local and obviously has her job and her kids and we both have stuff to do. She's the only friend I can rely on.

The rest of them buggered off and just don't wanna know at all so I'm done making the effort.

 

[MissMamma]

And I'm grateful for the support that being a member of BnB gives you, without BnB, I'd not have a chance to talk to anyone in similar situations as me so it has honestly been a godsend

Awh hunny i feel exactly the same!
Unfortunately this is just what happens...you just naturally grow apart from your friends because things are different now, you're interested in different things than they are. They still want to be able to go out and have no responsibilities whereas you can't! I've got to say though your 'friends' seem to be acting v. immature about it all! I say your better off without them by the sounds of it. You'll make new friends when LO is here and you can start meeting other young mummys at preschool/nursery in the meantime just concentrate on yourself, you're the most important one now and make lots of new friends on BnB..xx

 

[Raspberries]

I've had the same hun, due to extreme sickness and low blood pressure I've been off work since about 6/7 weeks (I work in a fast-food restaurant, the smell is enough to make me sick now, and the heat is too much) and since I've been off any of the work colleagues I thought were 'friends' don't speak to me. They ignore me if I see them and only talk to my OH who works at same place.

I had a couple of friends I used to go out with alot, but since they knew I was pregnant, they've stopped inviting me anywhere, fair enough in cases of clubs etc, but also just for days out. And one of them even arranged to meet me once when I was 12 weeks, but never showed up, and hasn't contacted me since.

And my best friend has kinda put me on a back burner, I'm the person to see if she's 'bored' and its 'fine' to let me down. And she's said it upsets her that I'm having a baby.

I guess you learn what your friends are truly like when you're pregnant, I'm guessing we especially notice because we're younger, I think it'd be different perhaps if we were all 30, and what society considers to be a 'normal' child-bearing age.

I stay close to my family and my OH, aswell as my little boy, they're all I need and BnB is a life-saver!

 

[vhal_x]

Again, thanks to everyone for all the support

You're all stars and I hope everyone has great pregnancies and births xx