Getting your lo's to sleep

[princess31]

Hi,

I know there's always posts about this type of thing but I wondered if anyone had anymore pearls of wisdom to share with me?

My problem is that my lo is falling asleep on his bottle and that is the ONLY way I can get him down for naps and at bedtime. This isn't a problem as such it's just that when he doesn't want to go to bed (even though he's tired) he now wont have his bottle, plus I'm trying to get him off bottles and get him weaned. We've tried the controlled crying but it's not for us or him. He has the strongest will in the world and he just cries and cries until eventually he's sick (he has bad reflux and this makes things ten times worse!). He now wont relax enough in our arms to fall asleep that way and he wont have a dummy. We've tried singing and using mobiles but that doesn't work either. It's getting to the stage where we only have to walk in his room and he starts crying.

Am I asking the impossible? Can anyone give me anymore tips?

Thanks xxx

 

[AppleBlossom]

All I can suggest is what I did. Grace would only fall asleep on the bottle so I put her in her room and left her. At first she cried and cried and I would go in and she'd stop but then I'd leave again and she'd cry. After a lot of hard work she eventually realised that crying was getting her nowhere and so she ended up getting herself to sleep.
Also don't take your LO off the bottle completely yet. Although he is weaning he still needs milk as a source of nutrients.
Good luck x

 

[Louisa K]

I always let Louis wear himself out, I try to keep him active and I don't put him to bed or down for his morning nap until I see the 'sleepy signs' which for him is touching his ear and rubbing his eyes..

I struggled for months trying to keep him to fixed routine but when I relaxed and waited for him to tell me he was ready for bed, he just naturally settled into a routine..

If its getting late and he is showing no signs then I usually give him a cuddle and read some books with him.. Otherwise he settles well in his rocker chair thingy and an episode of in the night garden..

 

[princess31]

All I can suggest is what I did. Grace would only fall asleep on the bottle so I put her in her room and left her. At first she cried and cried and I would go in and she'd stop but then I'd leave again and she'd cry. After a lot of hard work she eventually realised that crying was getting her nowhere and so she ended up getting herself to sleep.
Also don't take your LO off the bottle completely yet. Although he is weaning he still needs milk as a source of nutrients.
Good luck x

Thanks for the reply.
I know he still needs the milk but we are trying to get him down to just one bottle per day because he's has lots of health problems related to it.

I can't leave him to cry at all as he ALWAYS ends up being sick and never gives in. He doesn't even stop crying when we go back to him

I'm getting desperate, he needs to be able to settle himself otherwise we just end up with an upset baby every night.

 

[princess31]

I always let Louis wear himself out, I try to keep him active and I don't put him to bed or down for his morning nap until I see the 'sleepy signs' which for him is touching his ear and rubbing his eyes..

I struggled for months trying to keep him to fixed routine but when I relaxed and waited for him to tell me he was ready for bed, he just naturally settled into a routine..

If its getting late and he is showing no signs then I usually give him a cuddle and read some books with him.. Otherwise he settles well in his rocker chair thingy and an episode of in the night garden..

Thanks. My Louis LOVES in the night garden but it doesn't settle him, he just gets excited, LOL. He's a VERY highly strung baby and very strong willed.

He is in a really good routine for bed it's just the last couple of weeks he's started playing up a bit. I don't think the light nights are helping even though we close all the curtains he still knows!

 

[AppleBlossom]

All I can suggest is what I did. Grace would only fall asleep on the bottle so I put her in her room and left her. At first she cried and cried and I would go in and she'd stop but then I'd leave again and she'd cry. After a lot of hard work she eventually realised that crying was getting her nowhere and so she ended up getting herself to sleep.
Also don't take your LO off the bottle completely yet. Although he is weaning he still needs milk as a source of nutrients.
Good luck x

Thanks for the reply.
I know he still needs the milk but we are trying to get him down to just one bottle per day because he's has lots of health problems related to it.

I can't leave him to cry at all as he ALWAYS ends up being sick and never gives in. He doesn't even stop crying when we go back to him

I'm getting desperate, he needs to be able to settle himself otherwise we just end up with an upset baby every night.

I know you say he has reflux but getting himself into a state like that now he is getting older is probably also for attention. Grace used to scream blue murder, it was awful. It's lose/lose situation at the moment really. You can either keep letting him fall asleep on the bottle OR you can leave him to cry and make himself sick. In that situation I would just make sure he is dry, fed etc leave him in his room. If he cries so much he is sick, go in, clean him up, put him back down and start again. Don't cuddle him, don't take him into the lounge and don't speak to him. I know that sounds terrible but if he thinks that by making himself sick you will come in and give him cuddles and hold him till he falls asleep he will keep doing it. Babies are very clever!! It is hard listening to them cry when all you want to do is give them a cuddle but if we always gave in they would never learn. Believe me it will be better for you both in the long run x

 

[princess31]

He is definitely very clever and I do think he knows what he is doing. I'm not sure I'm brave enough to keep leaving him to be sick. I know eventually he'll learn that way but can I do it?

 

[princess31]

Anymore opinions on this?

 

[claire1978]

I agree with everything Bexy has said, it does sound mean but its cruel to be kind, I think its important to get them to know the boundaries from a young age, I used to work in a nursery (I was there 13 years) and the amount of parents who had this problem was mad, we used to advise them of this but it will only work if u are consistent and very persistent

Good luck, u really will need it but when it works u will be so proud of urself, keep us updated how u get on

 

[princess31]

Thank you, that's the kind of encouragement I need. I wouldn't have a problem doing this normally but he's been so ill and I hate the thought of him being sick.

 

[Mervs Mum]

I wont do crying it out or controlled crying of any type either - I think it's like everything with parenting - we all do what suits us.

TTCBaby#1 posted earlier on this about a BF baby doing the same thing - I thought her post was really good - BF or FF no different on this so have a look

https://www.babyandbump.com/breastf...-sleeps-mummys-laparoscopy-2.html#post2001948

 

[Loz75]

Hi, big I totoally sympathise. My Emma is 12 months and her sleeping is still very varied, sometimes she will sleep through, sometimes wake once and like last night and tonight waking and not going back to sleep. She too will just cry and cry and make herslef sick. If I leave her to cry she actually wakes herself up more, it's very depressing.
I find the only thing that works is to go in every 5 mins pick up, cuddle, put down and carry on going in every 5 mins. Eventually after 30 mins+ she usually goes to sleep. Often I give in if this doesnt work and co-sleep with her in the spare room.
Sorry no pearls of wisdom, but big symphathy!!!