Girls in the UK

[tabby28]

Actually, I would imagine most people's experiences are positive ones over here - the NHS is a very good system that we are lucky to have. I certainly wouldn't knock it, the last operation I had for my ectopic was a good experience (as hospital care goes anyway); and, like Poppy says, the childs health comes first and I certainly wouldn't want to endanger my baby.

I think the homebirth thing was planted in my mind by my mother, who was, ironically enough, an NHS doctor!

I suppose ultimately, it will depend on my particular pregnancy, when and if I am lucky enough to have one, and on the advice of the doctors/midwives into the best way to proceeed. It's nice to dream about homebirths for the moment though.

 

[winegums]

for anyone that thinks hospital birth is better than homebirth i'd recommend a few books especially dr grantly dick reeds book on childbirth without fear

or google it. it's really interesting!! talking about how strange it is that birth has become 'medicalised' and 'hospitalised' now and how women who have no knowledge on the hospital birth experience (i.e. in tribes in other countries) experience little pain or problems with their pregnancies.

xxx

 

[beckyfletcher]

My experiences with hospital have been both positive

With my first son i had a natural birth and my hubby was with me till he was born them had to leave but i ejoyed the me and baby time as he came up 8am the following morning and stayed till 8pm plus i enjoyed being in hospital as i got extra help with BF

With my second son i had a C Section due to him being breech and again he was there all through birth till visiting time was up and then again left it was harder with a section as you are restricted movement wise but again loved the me and baby time and the hosptoal staff were great too

hope this helps

 

[rosie5637]

i had my son in a midwife led birth centre. it was fantastic! i had a very long labour but the midwives were brill, i managed to stay calm throughout and didn't even swear!

the birthing room was very homely and after the birth i went onto the 6bed ward. my parents, who were with me during labour, went home for some sleep and came back again that evening.

it didn't bother me in the slightest being on the ward. meals were served up in the adjoining day room and all the new mums sat round the big table and ate togther. it was lovely. those who weren't up to it could have meals in bed.

the day room was great cause it had big comfy sofas and a telly so i didn't have to miss coronation street!

i'll probably go there again for the next baby. i don't like the thought of going to a big hospital.

i think each country probably looks at others and wonders why they do things in a certain way. i remember watching the birth stories in american hospitals and even the non complicated births all seemed to happen with the ladies on their backs and the midwives counting to 10 as they push. i even told my midwife that there was no way i wanted a birth like that and she laughed.

 

[Princess_LV]

Actually, I would imagine most people's experiences are positive ones over here - the NHS is a very good system that we are lucky to have. I certainly wouldn't knock it, the last operation I had for my ectopic was a good experience (as hospital care goes anyway); and, like Poppy says, the childs health comes first and I certainly wouldn't want to endanger my baby.

I think the homebirth thing was planted in my mind by my mother, who was, ironically enough, an NHS doctor!

I suppose ultimately, it will depend on my particular pregnancy, when and if I am lucky enough to have one, and on the advice of the doctors/midwives into the best way to proceeed. It's nice to dream about homebirths for the moment though.

In the groups section, there is a "homebirthers and hopefuls" group. One of them is actually in labour at the moment, at home still last time I looked. I've been kinda lurking around there as, although there is still a way for me to wait, it doesn't hurt to research these things now, and the women in the group seem very knowledgeable. If you decide to go for a home birth, I'd say make sure you are as knowledgeable as you can be, because although some areas are trying to be more pro-homebirth, others are not. Every woman in the UK has the right to a homebirth, you just might have to argue your corner quite hard to get it! Of course though, as you say, your decision really will depend on the particular pregnancy - I don't think anyone who had complications would sanely chose having their baby at home over the safety of their baby.

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

Your OH is allowed with you all the time when in etsablished labour. The only time my OH had to to go home is when I was on the antenatal ward as I wasnt in full blown lanour at that time

Your on a ward after delivery in my hospital but its like a room with two beds in so not that bad.
xx

 

[Baronessgogo]

You know what.. I am really concidering a home birth now.. lol

I don't want OH to leave me I am a baby.. and I would be a baby with a baby.. Thats not a good thing..

I don;t mind sharing a room though, I'm quite a chatty sociable person and I like company in that sense.

That doesn't make any sense? You're going to have that baby to look after for the rest of your life Your OH will be going back to work after 2 weeks will he not?

I feel the same way, after the 2 weeks of paternity leave i will be prepared but for that first night i wouldn't want my hubby to leave.

 

[poppy]

for anyone that thinks hospital birth is better than homebirth i'd recommend a few books especially dr grantly dick reeds book on childbirth without fear

or google it. it's really interesting!! talking about how strange it is that birth has become 'medicalised' and 'hospitalised' now and how women who have no knowledge on the hospital birth experience (i.e. in tribes in other countries) experience little pain or problems with their pregnancies.

xxx

Winegums, I am definately not saying that a hospital birth is 'better' than a homebirth. What I am saying (referring back to my post), is that if you decide on a homebirth, to make sure you have read up on things beforehand, to make sure you know what to do if you get into difficulties, for the safety of the mother and the baby. I think that for most women, a homebirth would be an amazing experience and totally problem free - however, there are women (and it is naive to think that every woman who has a home birth is going to do so complication free) who will experience problems, whether it is dealing with pain, or with the baby getting into difficulties or with problems after the baby has been delivered. I know of a few women who have had crash c-sections or forceps to get their baby out (things that cannot be done by midwives at home). I had a retained placenta. This had to be manually removed by a doctor. If it hadn't been removed quickly, I could have lost a lot more blood than I did (even with it being removed, I lost 1000mls of blood) or even badly haemorraged. Now, there was no indication that was going to happen to me until it did. If I had had a homebirth say and had been 1 hour or so away from a hospital, things could have been a lot more ropey.


I am also highlighting that I was referring to a first labour. Most midwives will caution against a home birth for a first labour (as you don't know how you will cope), especially if you live far from a hospital, but if you have had a complication free first labour, then most midwives will say to go for it. I have two friends who are gynaecologists in Scotland who say they would never recommend a homebirth for a first labour. They say that a lot of them result in the women coming in anyway, half way through the labour, some even being blue lighted all the way there.

My point is, to be armed with information if you are a first time mum and contemplating a home birth - I am definately am not against home births (so please don't misinterpret what I am saying), in fact, I am waiting to hear from a friend who is having a home birth and is has gone into labour today! She is extremely confident about it and I think she will do well (this is her third baby and she has had problem free deliveries). What I am saying is if you are a first time mum, make sure you have read up on things beforehand.

 

[Princess_LV]

IMO, although it is certainly true that most first-time mums will be advised against a homebirth, it's not necessary. I'll be demanding a home birth for my first child, and those to follow. It seems to me as well, that with hospital births, a lot of so called 'emergency' c-sections are not necessary either. I read somewhere (sorry, cannot remember the source!) that although emergency c-sections have been used increasingly over the last however many years, they have not actually increased the survival rates of babies that get into difficulties. To me, this points to them being completely unnecessary. Don't get me wrong, if a medical professional told me I needed to have a c-section, I wouldn't say no outright, because I'd rather be safe than sorry, but I'd certainly want some explanation as to why it was considered necessary.

Poppy, I totally agree with what you're saying, as what happened to you could not have been predicted, and I'm sure you posted somewhere else that it was very rare? But on the other hand, you never really know what is going to happen, first, third or tenth pregnancy! So no midwife will be convincing me otherwise on that point. I will be that horrible stubborn pregnant woman that all the midwives hate lol!

Sorry for the rambling ladies, but this is something I feel very strongly about. I want to have my children as naturally as possible, and I really can't see me getting what I want at a hospital or birth centre.

 

[tabby28]

Rosie - I have heard wonderful things about Midwife led wards and centers - a friend of mine recently had her second baby in one and said, like you, that it was a fantastic experience.

Princess - thanks for the tip! I really value the experience of other women, it helps me build a clearer picture of my options, and like you say, the better informed we are the better decisions we are likely to make.

Poppy- I think your advice is very important and well-considered. For first-timers, like me, there are all kinds of pre-conceptions (and idealism) about pregnancy and birth, but it is women like yourself who can highlight the unexpected aspects - whether complications or simply unexpected reactions -such as coping with pain, as you point out. I especially understand your point of view about homebirthing with your first. I really value conversations like this because I don't have many experienced friends/family to talk about it with - thank you!

 

[Lullaby2009]

My hospital stay when having Ruby was horrible. I was there for 4days with my daughter before eventually discharging myself. I'd had a lot of medical problems and was meant to be having morphine every 4hrs yet I was being left in agony for 6-7hrs at a time even though I'd remind them it was due/overdue and they could see the pain I was in. I decided to take my chances at home as at least they'd give me the meds and I could do it myself at home. Felt so much more comfortable with regular pain relief at home!! This time round I'm discharging myself a.s.a.p.

Also they sent my OH home within an hour of her being born, and I was left on my own in a side room after an emergency c section and both the call button and my baby left out of reach when they knew I could barely move due to severe spd and various other medical probs that had developed during pregancy. I HATED the hospital!!

 

[AnnaBanana9]

I think the hospital experience, even on the NHS, varies widely across the country. I can't speak highly enough of the midwife-led maternity unit at Sunderland Royal Hospital. I had Alyssa there last year - homey, comfy delivery suite, OH able to stay the entire time. All the medical equipment is put away in fitted wardrobes and only brought out if necessary, so it's almost as if you're in a B & B room really. Our midwives were kind, supportive and knowledgeable, and even gave us a kiss and a cuddle once Alyssa was born.

Alyssa arrived just before 6pm on a Sunday evening, so hubby was allowed to stay until about 11pm (although visiting hours ended at 8pm). I stayed with Alyssa in a cot by my bedside that first night in the delivery suite she was born in, then the following morning we were transferred to the post-natal ward, where we had a private room. It was lovely. Hubby was able to stay all day - from 10am till 8pm, and we were in hospital from the Sunday till Wednesday lunchtime when we were discharged and all went home as a family.

While in hospital, both in the delivery suite and on the post-natal ward, nothing was too much to ask. I had LOADS of support from midwives and lactation specialists on breastfeeding, helping to make sure Alyssa and I both learned what we needed to know to make a good team They came round all hours of the day and night to make me a cup of tea or just sit and have a natter... just simply terrific.

We really enjoyed our birth experience, but I'm not sure if we're the exception or the rule. I just know we're looking forward to the second time round!

x