GOD JESUS SOMEONE??!! so down...

[gonnagetabump]

https://i1289.photobucket.com/albums/b510/nycolecherry88/Mobile%20Uploads/IMAG0081_1_1_zpsb2354dea.jpg

Tree is up ..... CD2 ..... Begining of cycle 11 ..... I just keep sittin here praying that this time next year ill be holding my precious little baby..instead of this wine..I know alcohol is a no no during ttc but damn it a woman needs some comfort. I keep trying to keep my head up .... But its so darn hard. Im constantly on the verge of tears. ....Everytime I see a little baby I think...that could have been mine....that could have been me....I start to think I'm being punished.....for something I did at some point in my life....I feel just so broken. Inside. I keep going to church .... Praying trying to keep it together but I dont know why my heart feels so broken. Due to ovulate Christmas eve ..... Church service and hopefully some passionate bd giving me a long awaited blessing .... I'm just so sad.

 

[291]

I could have written this exact post.
We've just entered month 16th of trying for our second. First took 11 months, and we're a young couple. Done everything "right" by the books, and I don't even drink, have only had one wine this year...

No regular cycle here (has been more lately) but not getting 12 periods a year. Some cycles vary from 29 days (score!) to 49 days (boo).

Kinda sucks too, will be having IVF treatment start before I turn 30, and this first round will coinside with my next birthday, will be horrible if it does not work out.

Oh and all my family, they're the sort of people who can look at a mans foot and fall pregnant :\

 

[pandi77]

I know how you feel love! And don't feel bad about the wine....a little relaxation is just what you need! Besides I see it's red and that's good for you know lol.

Just keep doing everything you can every month to maximize you chances. I distracted myself many sad nights with reading fertility books and figuring out why it wasn't happening for us. I think the sadness was a fuel to my fire of determination after years of trying with no success. Stay strong (enjoy your wine) and baby dust to you!

 

[gonnagetabump]

Thanks for ur kind words everyone. Its the worst feeling to emotionally feel your heart break.

 

[Lynny77]

It is so hard. I didn't think it would be as heartbreaking as it is! I always thought it'd be so easy. And it's so out of your control theres only so much you can do. Enjoy your wine and cheers!

 

[gonnagetabump]

thanks! I was just feeling so terrible.

 

[Paloma123]

Keep the faith flower, really hope your blessing comes soon xx

 

[ByHisGrace08]

Hello Ladies,

So this has become my little mantra-

Yes God is hearing all of our prayers and His plan for us is much greater then anything we could ever imagine!!!! Keep talking to Him through praise and prayer, He is listening. He has a reason for our journey and while we cant see it now when we look back at this part of our lives we will see His fingerprints all over it and understand.

When my husband was supposed to be dying of meningitis I prayed and praised to the Lord the whole time through. I didn't know where the journey was leading while I was in the midst of it but at the end it was one of the hardest and best times of my life. I should be a widow but I am not, God has a plan just trust Him.

Blessings,

Blessings,

 

[gonnagetabump]

Byhisgrace-thank u so much I love the verse at the end of ur signature..Psalm 113:9 He gives the barren woman a home, making her the joyous mother of children.Praise the LORD!

 

[LittleLala]

Oh I know just how you feel- 2 years ttc#1. Currently drinking on cd7.

My husband and I have both mentioned a few times about next Christmas and how hopefully we will be holding a baby.... It makes me so upset, both of us so naive... So hopeful... I feel like the years are just going to go by with us saying the same thing, just looking at the Christmas tree and dreaming out the baby that we never seem to be able to have.
We cover the outside of our house with lights and fill the inside with decorations but we don't have anyone to share the excitement of Christmas with.

I'm glad that this site gives me someone to share my thoughts with. X

 

[gonnagetabump]

I agree......with you ... This ever lasting hope....that a little baby to be will be .... Here soon. I really hate waiting. 11 months this cycle ......that's sooo long. So long.

 

[gonnagetabump]

I just Dnk if I could wait another 11 months trying