Going to work after a MC... :/

Discussion in 'TTC After A Loss' started by LilDreamy, Nov 15, 2011.

  1. LilDreamy

    LilDreamy Guest

    Just curious... did you ladies go right back to work after a MC?

    They told me I could have the day off to grieve my loss, but today they have been doing nothing but calling and having me go in for rediculous resons. Like we had a Drug test at work today, wanted me to come in and pee in a cup.
    Then they said I was due for a hearing test, wanted me to go do that. Place was closed, so have to go back at 1 P.M. and then they wanted me to come in and fill some paper work out. And now saying that they are undermanned and want me to come in after lunch to work.

    I JUST had my MC yesterday afternoon. And I'm an emotional wreck right now. :cry:

    I don't have a choice but to go in...

    They don't care... :cry:
    To them it probably seems like a mc at an early stage wouldn't be so bad, but it really is! I can't stop thinking about it. And everytime someone asks me if I'm ok, I end up crying all over again. :(

    Just needed a rant. Because I'm starting to get very emotional again and really wish this was all just a really bad dream. :cry:
     
  2. Pocketrocket

    Pocketrocket Well-Known Member

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    i think take as long as you need. I mc beginning of Oct at 10 weeks. I went back to work 5 days after d&c, i felt like getting out and doing normal things helped. Give yourself time. Sorry for your loss xx
     
  3. Sparkle2

    Sparkle2 Well-Known Member

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    Ahh hunni.
    This will take time to get over- and people who havnt gone through it can't understand. Take everything step by step, it's a daily thing.

    Sorry for your loss.
     
  4. MrsMoo72

    MrsMoo72 Happy mum of 2!

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    Aww hunny, i'm sorry :cry:

    I had my mmc at the start of oct at 11 wks. I had a week sick leave and then a week of home study leave (i am a nursing student so can tweak my hours a bit!). But i am lucky that i have a lovely boss who questioned if i was even ready to go back after those two weeks. The only thing now is that i have a few hours to make up to make sure i pass my course!!
    I don't think i would ever have been ready to go back but thought i had to just "bite the bullet" as the longer i left it the more awkward i think i would have felt.

    But i think going in the day after is waaaay to soon and you should take as much time as you feel you need. They will manage without you and you prob won't be in any state to work anyway. Thinking about you :hugs:
     
  5. Twinkie210

    Twinkie210 Mom of 2 and an ^Angel^

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    I went back to work 3 days after my D&C (the operation was on a Friday and I went to work Monday morning). I however found out I was going to MC on a Monday and I took the rest of that day off and worked from home Tuesday through Thursday, then had my operation on Friday. The problem I had was that no one knew I was pregnant (I was waiting until 12 weeks to tell work and I was only 7 at the time). So people kept asking why I was out and what my operation was for. I told my boss when I got back to work and he was super nice about it and told me if I needed more time I could take it, but I really just wanted to get into a normal routine again.

    It seems like your work should give a few more days off if you need it though.
     
  6. LilDreamy

    LilDreamy Guest

    Thanks ladies. :)

    I feel I need time off.

    But I'm in the military and they aren't giving me any time off. I don't have any say in it. I just wanted to rant I guess. :(

    I kept crying at work today. I just don't know anymore. I hate this.
     
  7. pinksmarties

    pinksmarties Well-Known Member

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    Lil Dreamy, can't you see the base Medic and get signed off for a while? I would really hope the base doctor will do that for you. I had 2 weeks off, one when I found out I had mmc at 10 weeks and the another after the ERPC. Iit was hard being back at work after those 2 weeks never mind straight away. You need time to grieve and be gentle to yourself.
     
  8. Crownjewelz

    Crownjewelz Well-Known Member

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    Oh hun I am so sorry for your loss. Your work seems a bit insensitive to your need. I miscarried in the beginning of Oct at 9 weeks and my work gave my plenty of time off if I needed it. I would figure the military would understand a bit more. Im so sorry honey. It does get easier. I promise. Hugs to you. :hugs:
     
  9. scoobydrlp

    scoobydrlp Well-Known Member

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    People can be so insensitive, I'm sorry you haven't been allowed time off of work to grieve and heal. I was lucky to have lots of support from the people at my job, only a few people even knew that I was pregnant since I was only a little over 5 weeks, but they were very understanding. I found out I was miscarrying on Thursday so was out of work that day, I was scheduled off Friday, stayed out of work Saturday (somebody was nice enough to cover for me), and we are closed Sundays. Honestly I would have taken another day ideally, but decided to go back Monday anyway.

    I'm so glad I had time off to let myself really recover both physically and emotionally. I wish you had the luxury of doing the same. :hugs:
     
  10. blav

    blav 2 angels and TTC

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    I feel very lucky about how understanding my employer has been. I went through a second trimester loss at 22 and a half weeks and my employer offered to give me 6 weeks off (which is the standard maternity leave here). I will go back on December 1st after 4 weeks off. I feel like, if I knew no one would say anything to me, I'd be okay to go back now, but I still get upset talking about it out loud so I'm thankful for the extra time off. So very sorry for your loss.
     

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