Goodbye :(

[PrettySweetz3]

I went for a scan on the 22nd due to spotting...measured 5w3d which was off as I knew exactly when I ovulated.....spotting became worst and now I have mild bleeding that comes and goes...had a scan today which heartbeat was supposed to be detected...my doctor tried his best to find a heartbeat none...don't think he even saw a baby...he kept asking me about my lmp...so I know measurements were off...he looked at me and I told him that I've been mentally preparing myself for this since the 22nd...he just said dates may be wrong or what I've been getting for mentally and booked another scan for Monday...I know there's no BABY...I look and feel so pregnant that is even harder for me not to be depressed...I knew something was wrong...I just want this to speed up so I can try again...I usually get pregnant right away but I'll be 36 on July so of course I'm worried..I had an abortion 2 years ago and another one in November (I wanted those babies but personal things and medical reasons) I'm scared that I have damaged my body, and due to my age I won't get pregnant right away and will not be able to carry..I hate myself for having to get abortions...and I feel that is the reason why I lost this one...my doctor is just being nice..bless his heart....I feel so alone and so depressed right now..I got do angry when 2 babies passed by me..my oh has to work and I'm all alone...I'm cleaning the house like a maniac while crying hysterical at the same time...I'm sorry if there are typos but I can't see what I'm typing due to the tears and swollen eyes...I'm so scared to try again...but I need a baby in my life..I finally have a wonderful man that put a ring on my finger and wants a family with me....I'm so scared I won't be able to give him a baby...and now what do I tell everyone that noticed my baby bump??? I just want to never come out and cry cry cry

 

[Jessicahide]

Oh love, that is nothing to do with what is happening now xxx you had very valid reasons and no one, not even you, can pass judgement on you.... Miracles can happen please don't give up hope xxxx

 

[lewood88]

Im so sorry hun you will have your rainbow baby i have faith you will xxxx

 

[Peanutt]

I'm 36 and had a miscarriage last year so I know how you're feeling. But I got pregnant again and so will you.
Abortions do not damage your body and the universe is not punishing you for having them. If your baby really is gone, then they were a homesick angel that wasn't ready yet and will come back to you as soon as they're ready.

Cry your eyes out if you must. But know that this doesn't mean you won't have a baby.
My doctor told me after a miscarriage that it's much more likely to carry the next pregnancy to term.

It'll be okay.

 

[girlinyork]

I've not had abortions but I've had failed pregnancies removed medically and surgically and have still had a live birth with another on the way so physically it hasn't affected anything. Do you maybe feel like it is a karmic thing? Because I don't think that would be the case either. Even if I did believe in karma it sounds like you had sound reasons for what you did. I'm really sorry about your loss, please don't blame yourself

 

[Bevziibubble]

I'm so so sorry hun

 

[TTC 84]

So sorry Hun x I had a mmc in jan then conceived again in march I am now 12 weeks there is hope xx

 

[justplay91]

Oh hon. Nothing you did in your past could cause a miscarriage, I assure you. I have all the hope in the world for you that if this baby truly is gone, you will conceive again and have your beautiful rainbow baby. I wish you peace within yourself and a happy healthy pregnancy to come.

 

[gemstone]

So sorry Hun. I had a loss in 2010 June. I was pregnant by July & she is 4 now. Don't lose hope xx