GRRRR OH's Smoking!!

[leedsforever]

Ok yet another rant.... sorry!!

But its starting to wind me up now.... he seems to be smoking more!!

Now he never smokes in the flat... we never have but he will have a cigarette downstairs in the garage and when he comes back up the smell really really lingers on him its disgusting!! I keep telling him how much he stinks and I have pre warned him if hes still smoking by the time baby is here he is not allowed in the flat until his last cigarette was at least 30 mins ago!!

He says he is going to quit once baby is here.... but loads of times before he has promised he has quit yet he does it behind my back!!

It really frustrates me cos I quit smoking (alhtough only a social smoker) and he would absolutely go mad if I carried on smoking!! But yet its ok for him to continue to smoke!!

 

[Carley]

You need to put your foot down and say something!

 

[claire roach]

ive said exactly the same to my oh

 

[nessajane]

I know the feeling i hadt he exact same problem with my OH. We both smoked socially and i stopped when found out i was pregnant and he told me he would give up as i started to feel sick around smokers the smell disgusted me but we went on hols 2 weeks ago and he started smoking giving the excuse 'im on holidays' i went bonkers but he still carried on!! ive told him if he smokes hes to go outside in the garden and he needs to brush his teeth and spray deodrant so i cant smell it on him!! men

 

[Blob]

Maybe you need to give him some info on it maybe it would help? Hope you get it all sorted

 

[nikky0907]

I wonder if those pictures of rotten lungs and such would work( I know,terribly morbid.Should be used in extreme cases only! )
And then explain to him that passive smokers will have the same happen to them,including your daughter if he continues to smoke!

A little guilt trip couldn't hurt!

 

[Ema]

Ok yet another rant.... sorry!!

But its starting to wind me up now.... he seems to be smoking more!!

Now he never smokes in the flat... we never have but he will have a cigarette downstairs in the garage and when he comes back up the smell really really lingers on him its disgusting!! I keep telling him how much he stinks and I have pre warned him if hes still smoking by the time baby is here he is not allowed in the flat until his last cigarette was at least 30 mins ago!!

He says he is going to quit once baby is here.... but loads of times before he has promised he has quit yet he does it behind my back!!

It really frustrates me cos I quit smoking (alhtough only a social smoker) and he would absolutely go mad if I carried on smoking!! But yet its ok for him to continue to smoke!!

OMG Kerry, My OH is EXACTLY the same!! It drives me made. He used to moan and moan when i smoked (pre pregnancy) but since being pregnant he seems to smoke more (and the same never in the house, we never have i hate the smell) but when he comes back in he STINKS!! and it drives me mad! Double standards or what because if i continued then he would be the first to moan.

MEN!

 

[leedsforever]

i really doubt shock tactics will work with him and I know he def wont smoke around LO cos there is no way Ill allow it!! But its just really frustrating cos he doesnt realise how much the smell lingers on you after you have had a cigarette!!

Also the money aspect of it... I mean they are not cheap!! Im just praying he keeps his word and gives up once I have the baby because its a disgisting habit and I just dont want it associated with us as family if you know what I mean!!

Ema- I used to think I would smoke again on nights out and stuff and maybe at social events but I really really am going to try not too!!! Ive gone this long without smoking and I dont miss it and it really is so unattractive..!! Do you feel the same??

I have a friend who smoked... quit when pregnant... now smokes again (no where near babba) but still I think its so pointless!!!

 

[Ema]

Im defo not smoking again.....Well hopefully it was pointless but after doing it for so long it was hard to give up. Now ive managed it im going to try my hardest to stay stopped XxxX

 

[Sarahkka]

I wonder could you talk to him about the influence of that behaviour on LO? It's one thing when she's a tiny baby, but as soon as she starts to become more aware of the people in her life, that's setting an example for her to smoke someday.
And for those of you who need some more ammunition on the OHs coming in smelling of smoke - if you can smell it, there are still harmful particles present on the clothes. And if he then holds baby, she has her little face snuggled right in close to those particles and is so exposed. It's not as bad as a lung-full of secondhand smoke, but it's still harmful and completely preventable! My SIL made my smoker FIL change his shirt before he was allowed to hold her little preemie twins - they were already delicate and she wasn't having any risks to them that she could prevent.

 

[mBLACK]

I was the same when I was with my OH! They just don't understand! I used to refuse to hug/kiss him because he stunk like a discusting cigarette, and that would most of the time convince him not to smoke if he was gonna see me.

 

[PeanutBean]

In my experience, or rather than of my best mate, OH's never seem to keep their word about giving up such things when xxx arrives, be it marriage, baby, whatever. In my personal experience, you can't make a smoker quit if they don't really want to, and if he did really want to, he'd surely be doing something about it by now?

I'm lucky, my DH gave up a few months after we met so I've not had to face this but I just wouldn't be able to put up with it. I wish I could offer some more constructive advice but I just think he will do it if he wants to.

Maybe when he sees LO it'll throw life into perspective for him?

 

[leedsforever]

i agree..... smokers will not quit unless they really want to!!

Im strong though and I will make him wait outside until the stench has warn down!!! Newborns you cant touch them for 60 mins after having a cigarette as it comes out of your skin etc!!!

Sometimes though I think the smell he brings in (we live in a 2 bedroomed flat) he mights as well just bloody smoke there!!! I always say YOU STINK !! I just think that my poor baby will have to smell that too!!!

Ill be the chain on the door everytime he goes for a cigarette I think.....!!!

 

[PeanutBean]

i agree..... smokers will not quit unless they really want to!!

Im strong though and I will make him wait outside until the stench has warn down!!! Newborns you cant touch them for 60 mins after having a cigarette as it comes out of your skin etc!!!

Sometimes though I think the smell he brings in (we live in a 2 bedroomed flat) he mights as well just bloody smoke there!!! I always say YOU STINK !! I just think that my poor baby will have to smell that too!!!

Ill be the chain on the door everytime he goes for a cigarette I think.....!!!

lol You keep him away! Did you have much morning sickness? God with my nausea I've not been able to stomach passing smokers never mind in my house, the worst is stinking commuters next to me on hot trains! How did you manage?!

 

[leedsforever]

lol You keep him away! Did you have much morning sickness? God with my nausea I've not been able to stomach passing smokers never mind in my house, the worst is stinking commuters next to me on hot trains! How did you manage?!

It didnt last long luckily but yeh it was soooooooo gross to smell it!!! I used to get him to take me to work cos I couldnt stomach driving and him pulling off quickly used to make me feel so sick too!!

So weird how you forget how you felt in the 1st tri!!!

 

[PeanutBean]

So weird how you forget how you felt in the 1st tri!!!

I wish I could but that would mean not feeling the same now! lol

 

[leedsforever]

awww hope the ms eases soon!!!

 

[cuddles314]

Really hope your OH sees sense soon, and makes a real effort to quit. Explain to him that the smell will linger in the flat, once he brings it in, and could make bubs clothes, toys etc smell too. What does he say about not being able to hold bubs after he's had a ciggie?
I stopped when I got pregnant, and can really notice the smell on others now. I really hope I don't start again after bubs is born, cos I think I've done so well, and it'd be stupid to undo all my hard work.
xx

 

[emma_27]

If i was you id make him stand outside and air off for 10mins before he came back in id make him have a chewing gum and spray hisself with something. I was a 20 a day smoker when i fell pregnant with my first son i gave up straight away. His nearly 3 now and ive not turned back its so smelly but when your a smoker you dont realise or care really. Like what was said before just try and explain about the influence on your LO as she grows up in the hope that it might encourage him to quit.

 

[welshcakes79]

can wholly sympathise with you..my mum smoked since she was 16 and it was only the fact she was having an organ meltdown where her body was shutting down and she had to be hospitalised that stopped her..
me and my sis used to be to embaressed to invite friends back due to the smell...

dont know what you could say to him that might make him cut down/stop coz like you said they'll only stop when their ready no amount of nagging makes them..

but i agree 110% with you about not letting him nr LO till smell has gone.. nothing worse than picking up a newborn that smells like an ashtray ...

X