Help - bad night...

[kateqpr]

I got so little sleep last night i just sat in bed crying, thinking i just can't cope. I know it's just sleep deprivation, and i feel fine (albeit tired) today, but nights are really getting me down.

Basically Poppy is great during the day, but at night she just feeds (BF) for ages (i mean hours!), and then falls asleep. When i put her in her cot, she falls asleep, but wakes up about ten mins later crying. She can't be hungry (though i am going to try to top her up with formula tonight to see if it is that..) but if we give her a finger to suckle on, she tends to fall back to sleep.Trouble is that means she then comes into our bed so one of us can let her suck our finger.

Anyone any advice? I'm going to try to start a routine tonight and put her in her basket after an earlier feed and leave her to sleep. But at this age, is it ok to let them cry and settle themselves? It just seems so early to do that....and makes me feel awful.

Just feel crap and like a bad mother today

 

[thelilbump]

hi there

first of .

my DD was very much like this and we had to give into the dummy! we actually got some sleep from that very night

 

[ryder]

Have you tried a dummy?? I was told by my hospital they were fine with a bf baby... some say not to... its up to you.

You dont have to leave her to cry, you can try rocking her with a dummy (if she will take one) and put her down... if she cries attempt to sooth her while she is in her cot, the is what I did. And it didnt take long for her to be ok in her cot.

 

[thelilbump]

p.s we breastfeed aswell. we also tried the 3 minte controlled crying thing n it didn't work just got us all upset but everyones different x

 

[Jemima]

I had my Poppy in bed with me for a few nights when she was tiny and it helped (kicked DH out onto the sofabed though but he wasn't bothered coz he got a better night's sleep too!)

 

[kateqpr]

I have got a newborn dummy and tried it last night. She was curious about it, and did suck, but then i had to hold it for her for a bit, but when she had it on her own she sort of ended up gagging on it and coughing it out. I wonder whether she's a bit small for it yet (she's only just over 6lbs so not sure if that makes a difference???)

I will try it again tonight. I guess i'm just worried the co sleeping will start a pattern i end up getting stuck with in a few weeks or months time.

 

[polo_princess]

Keep at it with the dummy it may take her a little while to get used to it as its a bit different from your nipple.

Hope you manage to find something that works hun

 

[sparkswillfly]

Meadow was the same with dummys I think they are too big for her mouth still.

 

[vanessa]

May was exactly the same (big comfort feeder, but grew out of it really soon after, I would say by 6 weeks), and took a while to get used to a dummy, we ended up getting some from Mothercare for premature babies (she wasn't premature, and was 7lbs but the normal ones bumped her in the nose!)
I used to sit in bed crying at night too, or sleep on the sofa with May in the pram next to me just rocking her virtually all night. I just wanted to say - it WILL improve, quite drastically in our case, she sleeps through now and has done since 8 weeks. I totally didn't think I would EVER sleep again!! Good luck

 

[embojet]

I think she just needs to get used too the dummy. I'm sure she's not too small as Molly has had a newborn dummy since she was about 4lb, and is fine with one now at 5lb 6oz. It did take her a little while to be able to hold it in her mouth herself, just takes persistence.

 

[ryder]

Jasmine was 6lbs 1 oz and used a dummy the second night she was alive... It is just a different thing for her to leanr to suck on.

 

[Serene123]

Caitlyn used to do the same. They grow out of it. Sleep when she sleeps. Newborns sleep LOADS, broken, but still alot!

 

[Freya]

Ahhh chick, we've been there too.

dummys do take perseverence (as it's new sensation), newborn or preemie dummy may work better. BUT some bubs dont like them at all. Be mindfull that she may need reminding how to latch on to the boob if she does start on a dummy or a bottle of ff, but shouldn't be a drama.

IMHO ur bub is too young to 'cry it out' as she cries because she needs something.

She is also too young to get used to sleeping in your bed, so co-sleeping to get you through a couple of weeks wont hurt.

A night time routine sounds great.... it will help orientate bub to the difference between night and day.

 

[kateqpr]

thanks everyone. Have bought a tiny dummy to try. And will try to remember it does get better....

 

[LuluBee]

oh honey, dummies do work wonders. Alex goes through the night now - but only with the aid of a dummy - I have to pop it back in his mouth every hours or so from 3 o'clock, but then he's straight back to sleep. Don't worry it will get easier and you sound like a fab Mum, I'm in tears if Alex doewsn't sleep after an hour so you're doing an amazing job!

 

[shampain]

Hiya hun can totally relate to you been so tired and frustrated that your in tears during the night...me and my partner spent many a night blubbing in bed together trying to sooth Patrick...it honestly does get easier, and i know at the moment you are probably thinking "what the hell am i doing with a baby?" but you will all find your feet soon and settle down a bit. I remember Patrick been the same age as your little one and me been frantic with exhaustion when the midwife used to come and also Patrick had about a week of not sleeping at all at night! I had the same problem with the dummies, he wasnt interested at all at first and i used to hold it in and he would choke...just persevere....it does it easier i promise you...now when i look back on the first few weeks....i think it wasnt so bad but at the time i just hated every minute! xxxxx

 

[ColtonsMom]

Ahhh chick, we've been there too.

dummys do take perseverence (as it's new sensation), newborn or preemie dummy may work better. BUT some bubs dont like them at all. Be mindfull that she may need reminding how to latch on to the boob if she does start on a dummy or a bottle of ff, but shouldn't be a drama.

IMHO ur bub is too young to 'cry it out' as she cries because she needs something.

She is also too young to get used to sleeping in your bed, so co-sleeping to get you through a couple of weeks wont hurt.

A night time routine sounds great.... it will help orientate bub to the difference between night and day.

I think this depends on the baby, Colton napped with me during the day when he was only 1-2 weeks old (I slept EVERY time he did), and by 4 weeks he completely coslept because he would no longer sleep in his bassinet, even with my hand on him/holding his hand and me sitting where he could see me.. he absolutely refused unless he was completely against me. It was fine though, we coslept until up until a few weeks ago.

First of all.. you are doing fab honey! I used to get upset when Colton woke up a bunch during the night, even though he would usually go straight back to sleep it used to frustrate me. I would agree with the others, and keep trying with the dummy. It's completley new and she will have to use it a few times before she gets used to it. Hope she sleeps better with it tonight!

 

[MoonMuffin]

She's still very young, so she will still eat a lot even at night, Kathryn needed a few bottles a night untill recently. Now she will wake up twice, but if we get up quickly and give her her (training) sippy-cup she'll drink a couple oz and drift off to sleep again. Basically the first couple months are tough, and then it gets better (I promise, and though it seems forever away it'll come before you know it!). All I can say is that even though it seams impossible to keep it up, you will get through it! Good luck

 

[pinkmac85]

LeeAnne still chokes/gags on her soother from time to time...I don't think she fully understands the concept so I have to hold it in her mouth for a few seconds and then she clues in to suck it! We found some of them were uncomfy for her because they also hit her nose so we bought smaller ones! She has 2 out of about 12 that she will only use, the others she has no interest in!

 

[mummymadness]

Snap !! .

My story is 100% the same hun, I cannot get any sleep Oscar sleeps fine in the day .. But cried like crazy at night.
He isnthungry but looks like his nuzzling to find something to suck, He is a small 6lb aswell and cannot get to grasp with a dummy they are all really too big for him.
Hes sleeping about an hour then feeding then screaming for hours ... I even have the black bag eyes to prove it ..

If you find any solutions please let me know . **Hugs** . xxx .