He's moved the goal posts! UPDATE POST 22!

[LittleMinx]

Oh my gosh i just wanna scream and then cry

Last night i was super chuffed that AF was entering the building (spotting) which would mean by the time full flow was here today i would of had a 28 day cycle... This is my 1st proper period off the pill (since withdrawal bleed) so was expecting a screwy cycle. But nope my body has behaved for once.

Anyway onto this mornings lovely chat with my OH... I was just adjusting my ticker and my OH said about future due dates, so for 'fun' i checked... Then my OH proceeded to tell me that we should WAIT until december to TTC All because statistically children born September-March do better at school and he wants to give our children the best chances. Yes that's lovely!!! But we are 33 & 34 years old, he only has 1 testicle due to cancer 9 years ago and we are both slightly over weight... So some factors to making TTC slightly more challenging.

My heart dropped and I feel like my opinion means nothing, I mentioned that i had always wanted a summer baby (all mine are winter) But he is not budging.

Of course i will respect his opinion and hold off until december, but its made me feel so sad .. Its taken us a long time to decide on having another baby and i thought we were finally there.... But Noooooo! He has to move the flipping goal posts.

Sorry for the ranting post.. But i needed to just offload.

 

[hopefulfor1st]

Uh huh so under his reasoning if it doesn't happen within 6 months will you stop for 6?

 

[chimmi]

That's a load of rubbish about what time of year a child is born affecting their performance at school..!
I know each to their own, but just because you start to ttc on a certain month unfortunately doesnt mean you will actually conceive then.. we've been trying for 15 months and now i don't care when my baby is born i just want to get pregnant..!
Didn't mean for this to sound horrible and good luck to you both

 

[LittleMinx]

I am totally with you both! I don't agree regarding statistics etc, but hey ho I will respect him on his opinion as he feels so strongly about it. I have said though that come next year i will NOT stop and start depending on the month.

He generally will do anything for me and really is a lovely guy, but he just seems so set on this

Thanks for your replies xx

 

[chimmi]

Well good luck to you. I'm not sure what I would do if it were me in that situation, but those two months will go so fast anyway! Just take loads of folic acid and vitamins and keep healthy and It will help when it comes to the time to TTC x

 

[hopefulfor1st]

My birthday is in may....I must be a dumbass.

 

[chimmi]

My birthday is in may....I must be a dumbass.

Mine is in May too!

 

[LittleMinx]

My birthday is in may....I must be a dumbass.

I'm a May baby too hun .. Oh well his loss, I'm assuming he doesn't want sex for 2 months cause I am not preventing that's for sure x

 

[chimmi]

Haha good for you!

 

[LittleMinx]

Well good luck to you. I'm not sure what I would do if it were me in that situation, but those two months will go so fast anyway! Just take loads of folic acid and vitamins and keep healthy and It will help when it comes to the time to TTC x

Thank you hun, I'm taking folic acid and now have more time to loose some more weight. Gotta find the positives in this and look forward I guess

 

[tinadecember]

I agree, the whole sept-march thing is a load of rubbish! My little one is a July baby and is as bright as a button and my sister is a November baby and has learning difficulties. I don't think someone's intelligence has anything to do with the month they were born in.

I understand that he is your husband and you want to respect his wishes but in a relationship it's supposed to be 50/50, he should respect yours too. xx

 

[mummy4kids]

Good luck Hun.xx

 

[LittleMinx]

Thanks ladies

I think my OH reasons are silly and maybe a way of him stalling things for a couple of months.. I've been thinking about it all morning and its just not like him to be like this. From January we will be in a much better position financially, also we have made a quit smoking plan to get us 100% quit come January. So maybe to him he wants things just right, he is very OCD (our money/bills etc are worked out to the penny up to 2016) He panics a bit if things are not going to plan.

So maybe its a smoke screen! Who knows? Now got to ride it out and get 100% TTC fit and healthy x

 

[Perla10022]

Before my Mom had my baby brother (at age 36) my Dad had said he wanted to wait a bit... She shrugged, said "sure", never mentioned it again and got pregnant immediately. He had no idea what she was or wasn't doing to prevent, they only think with their boy parts! FYI, my brother was the last ever egg, she had unknowingly been in the onset of early menopause and never had another period after baby bro was born.

Sorry for the long story, moral is.. Do what you want! If it were left up to men the human race would end.

Xxx baby dust from an October baby

 

[Fleur29]

Also worth bearing in mind that sometimes you don't have huge control over when your baby will be born! My dd was due in December but came 6 weeks early and born in October! What will he do if you get preg in dec with a sept due date and then pop it out on 31 August???! I am a late August baby and got straight a's all the way through school and have a degree too

 

[LittleMinx]

The one thing we can almost control (unless prem) is due date as I will have to deliver via c-section! I am going to talk to him tonight as i am not buying his reason at all! I think something is holding him back and that he is using this as his reasoning.

Thanks ladies and lots of baby dust and luck to you all xx

 

[LittleMinx]

Well.... He just rang me as he does every lunch time and I spoke to him about it briefly. I said to him that generally these studies are well off and about some of what you ladies said. He replied "well i'm not getting anywhere with this, so we will just stick to your plan" .. Looks like someone may back down and is just scared!! I will leave it now and just see what happens.

What is it with men? (not all of them)

 

[chimmi]

Maybe he feels pressurised?

 

[LittleMinx]

Maybe hun.. I'm just gonna see how it goes and not talk about TTC with him! I have all you ladies for that

xx

 

[chimmi]

Yeah good plan. I've stopped talking about it like i used to. It's so easy to get carried away with it. Good luck!