Hi girls! (and guys!)

[Serene123]

I don't know if you've seen my thread in the girly sanctuary but I need some advice. Me and Rich have had ANOTHER major fall out and I just can't stand for it anymore. He is so nasty. He is only interested in Caitlyn when it's getting him into my home or winding me up. Anyway, I want to go through the court if he wishes to see her, but does it look bad on me if I stop letting him see her? Or if I change my number etc? Not sure what I can do without it making me look like the bady. I'm fed up of being told I should make his life what he wants it to be because it's "my fault" he has a daughter.

 

[fifi83]

Its diffcult, im going throw something similar at the moment and not sure what to do myself and whats for the best. Couldnt you lay down some rules, i.e maintenace when and how much he has to pay, visits some set rules so you both no where you stand and say that if he doesnt stick to them then he will have to go throw the courts theres nothing unfair about that, if your like me your thinking it would be unfair to do this cos your putting everybody elses feelings before your own, more bothered about what he will think, but as someone going throw it myself its much easier said than done. x

 

[Serene123]

I have tried so many times to have set dates and times. If I do that he just f*cks it up on purpose and doesn't turn up and changes days and doesn't give me money when he says he will. He goes out of his way to be akward but threatens to leave Caitlyn's life if I get the courts involved.

 

[Younglutonmum]

I wouldn't change your number or anything like that. It will look better on you if you leave all doors of communication open

I'd go & get some legal advice. Maybe get a solicitor to send him a letter laying out terms of visitation rights. If he's not happy with that then go to court. At least you've then given him the chance to sort something without going through the court process

As for child support, CSA will be the best way forward if he's gonna mess you about

 

[brownhairedmom]

DON'T prevent him from seeing her before you go to court! Its the worst thing you could do. If you feel that he is only doing that and just harassing you, I'd file a complaint with the police.

 

[Quaint]

Can i just say first and foremost what a beautiful pic of you and your daughter!
Just look at the way she is looking at you ahhhhh
Sadly i have been in your situation, there is no easy way out. The Dad of my 3 children is totally useless... i am convinced if he wasnt in there lives they would be far more stable. When they go to visit him he leaves them with any Tom, Dick or harry... saying it is his right to go out drinking as he works all week. I could list many many things he has done but i would be here hours lol... so i wont bore you with details.
But.... as much as i hate it... i have NEVER stopped them seeing him... i have never broke contact between them as i want the children to work out for themselves that he is a complete arsehole... which is a far better way to go about it as they are rapidly realising exactly what he is for themselves.
I tend to think... its his loss... when they are older with families of there own they will remember how he treated them and he will end up a very lonely old man.
Just stay strong for your baby's sake, i know its hard but keep your chin up.
Good luck x

 

[kayjor04]

i seen your other posts... and i believe i told you to go ahead and change your number.. i may reconsider, these ladies make a good point... you dont wan to do anything to make yourself look bad, but If you feel you, or caitlyn (sorry if thats spelled wrong) are in danger being around him AT ALL. then by all means, i'd do anything i could to protect my babe...

Do you think your ex would want partial custody of her? because i know over here, no matter what.. mother gets first word... as long as your not drinking abusing or doing drugs around babe... here its near impossible to have babe taken away...

I'd take care of this legally as fast as u could... my ex moved across the country to avoid his responsibility...