Homeless and not in love!!

[Mummy_to_be87]

To cut a very long story short...

I have been asked to leave my current house by my landlord, I have to be out in the next 28 days, leaving me completely homeless, I dont have savings for deposits on another private let house, I dont have anywhere to go and I am heavily pregnant and have a 1 year old daughter! I will go to the council on Wednesday and fingers crossed they can help get me a house somewhere! I am stressed out as I thought I would be here until my second baby is born but now I am having to try and find a house and then move house and get settled in before the baby comes! All too fast in my opinion!

Secondly, recently I have started to fall out of love with my OH. I dont really know why, but I dont feel like I love him anymore! I just prefer to be away from him all the time, he sleeps downstairs as I tell him that I need to stretch out in bed but I dont, I just dont want him in bed with me! I spend a lot of my time going to my mums house during the day so I dont have to be near him and in the evenings he goes out! I just feel so down about it and he tells me he really loves me but I just look through him! Im not happy! He has asked me loads this morning if I am alright as I look sad and he even asked me if I still love him and I lied and said yes as he is a really good guy with a true heart! I dont want to leave him as I am stressed out about losing the house and giving birth in the near future but that is like using him which isnt nice! I even considered asking him not to move into the new house with us!

I just need to get this off my chest and any advice would be appreciated

 

[Eleanor ace]

Oh crickey! I can't believe you're being kicked out with such short notice . Did he give you a reason why?
With regards to your OH, has this just started recently? I know a lot of ladies go off their OH's when they're pregnant or LO is new due to the hormones, could it be that?

 

[Mummy_to_be87]

Oh crickey! I can't believe you're being kicked out with such short notice . Did he give you a reason why?
With regards to your OH, has this just started recently? I know a lot of ladies go off their OH's when they're pregnant or LO is new due to the hormones, could it be that?

My landlord says he wants the house back so he can make more modern changes to it and then get new tennants in, he was getting paid on time every month, he just wants his house back

I remember feeling like this a little last pregnancy and after my DD was born for about 4 months and finally got through it but it was so tough and I hate that it is beginning again, I dont know if I can pull through about 7-8 months of this again! I think I should talk to him about my feelings and be honest and but then what if he leaves and it is just hormones, then I will have lost my soulmate but if I dont say anything the bickering will begin and I dont know if either of us can deal with that again

 

[soph901]

hey hunni sorry to hear u having such a bad time ive gone through a similar situation to u apart from the fob left me at 5 weeks hes tried numerous times to get me back but truth is i cant forgive or forget and would find it impossible to love him again as much as i would love to be one of those all together family types that just aint possible in the end its down to u n what u feel is right for u n ur los it doesnt stop the fob from being a father well did for me but hes not mature enough to take care of a baby also as for housing ive only just got a place off council went at 12 weeks am now 35 took ages n first place they offered was a hell hole so i rejected due to all damage then took 3 more weeks for them to offer me a place area is much better granted its a flat but its a big one gunna take ages to decorate n may have him before i'm in thank heavens for friends n family i dunno where i would be good luck hun n hope things work out for u x

 

[maggie111]

If you're in the UK, Shelter the homeless charity might be able to advise you on your deposit for the new flat etc.

As for your OH, it sounds an awful situation to be in. Is it possible though that you're just being a bit hormonal and when the baby arrives your feelings might change? If nothing has changed like an affair or anything, I wonder if you hang around (if you feel you can) it might improve



Edit - just read your latest post, why don't you speak to the doctors? Maybe some pills might brighten your mood a little?

 

[Mazzymoo]

Perhaps don't make any big decisions re: oh when ur hormones are all over the place! Maybe see how u feel after lo is born xx

 

[Annie77]

It is unfortunate but totally normal to go off your OH during pregnancy so don't make any rash decisions right now. Your midwife may be able to make a telephone call or two to help the housing situation.

 

[RaisinKane13]

I am so sorry about your home. Your landlord should've given you more of an notice than just a month. That is crazy. I hope you receive the help you need, and asap.

Secondly, Being pregnant is a roller coaster. I wouldn't make any crazy decisions to leave him. Maybe you should talk to your DH. The only person that can help you with the way you feel, is the person that is you have the issue with. I think talking to him will help him understand how you are feeling. I personally do not think it is far that you aren't speaking to him about it and he's in the dark.

I hope things start to get better. Nobody deserves what you are going through. But it does help to have somebody in your corner too!

 

[iwantabub]

*Hugs*

Your landlord is so mean kicking you out this shshort notice. ..

As for ur dh ... maybe like the othet girls have said might be a bit of prenatal depression... maybe chat to your doc before u chat to oh so u dont freak him out just yet and maybe they can prescribe something or send u to a counselor maybe and help...

So sorry u feel lowsy

X

 

[USAF_WIFE]

I am sorry about your housing and I hope you can find something. In regards to your OH though, I love my husband we have been together 7 years but this pregnancy has made me just want to smack the crap out of him all the time as everything he does annoys me. I have a hard time being intimate because it gives me like this ew kind of feeling its like I am into it and the thought then things annoy me and gross me out. I can't explain well but I know its just hormones because I was all over him making this baby and we have two other kids.

 

[Kiwi4545]

No advice,other than good luck, but I feel so badly for you. That situation has got to be very stressful. Maybe the thing with OH is hormones? See how you feel after delivery...when your hormones have had a chance to get back with it. Hugs!

 

[Dani_Ldn]

Do you have a formal tenancy agreement with your landlord? How long have you been living there for? Has he given you formal written notice, or just verbal?

Regarding your oh, I have also had times where I don't want him anywhere near me he annoys the hell out of me with everything he does! Maybe see how you feel after the birth of baby & then make a decision if you still feel the same way.

 

[Caroline:-)]

Hi Hun, i work in housing for my local authority. Has your landlord given you formal notice? He needs to give formal written notice called S.21. Without this, any notice he's given you is invalid. When you go to the council to see the homelessness officer, make sure you take a copy of the notice, along with your tenancy agreement & any other relevant info you may have. Why is your landlord wanting you out? depending on the reason, they will probably start by calling him to see if there's any way he will come to an agreement for you to stay longer. As you are pregnant & have a child you will be classed in priority need but it could potentially still take some time for them to find a property for you & temporary housing may be necessary. Good luck Hun xxx

 

[MustBeMummy]

I dont think the council are at liberty to help you until u r literally on their doorstep with bags in hand. Ive been there myself.
As for the oh I was exactly the same. Thought id end up divorced a few months ago. I couldnt bear for dh to be near me. Everything he did n said irritated me didnt want him near me at all. Thought id fallen out of love with him. I was ready to walk out even if it meant being a single mum Took a while but my feelings have changed now and im so much happer now and I know hes gonna be the best husband and daddy he can be.
I really hope u can get things sorted