How did you feel when you found out you were pregnant?

[AllDayLong]

Hi,

I'm 19 (20 at the end of the year) and have just found out I'm pregnant (I'm around four weeks). I've been with my BF for just under a year (great relationship) and we both have good, stable jobs with great benefits (Free BUPA healthcare is one of these). We're currently renting but have no debt and make good money.

I'm just curious to know how you all felt when you found out you were pregnant, because I currently feel very indifferent. We weren't trying but weren't preventing. We sorta had the attitude that it wouldn't happen to us, but if it did, we'd be OK with that. I feel abnormal for feeling like this. I thought I'd either freak out or be really happy, but I feel detached and the same as I did last week, albeit a little confused. Is this normal?

Thanks x

 

[kaylamariee]

First off congrats!
I felt this way with baby number one.. I got pregnant at 18 and had her at 19.. I didn't feel very attached at first. You just have so much going through your mind when you first find out.. As your pregnancy goes on you'll start getting more excited and when you go for your first ultrasound, feel your first kick, find out the sex etc.. You'll get even more attached
A lot of women feel like this and it's normal!
Now I'm pregnant with baby number two
I'm Kayla, and 20 years old now.. If you ever need someone to talk to or have questions I'm here

 

[Megloves]

First of all congrats!

Secondly, when I found out I kind of freaked out a bit. OH and I had been together for over a year, but at the time we were fighting a lot. I was worried about supporting this baby and if i would have to do it alone. Luckily, the issues that were going on between me and OH are doing better now, but still. It was more nerves about OH than about baby if that makes sense? I was fairly indifferent about the baby itself and really didnt feel truly attached until hearing the heartbeat and starting to come up with names and such.

 

[ClairAye]

Congratulations

With our first I freaked out a bit as we had barely been together, but within a week or less I was really excited! With our second I was buzzing from the start, but I knew what I was in for as DS was 11 months old.

What you are feeling is normal though, it's a lot to take in, I'm sure it will come though, with our first I only really thought 'I'm actually pregnant' after the first scan and I felt a million times more attached to him

 

[nic18]

congratulations ! I'm Nicola 19 & due my first in 5weeks

We were ttc for ageeees! and kind of gave up thinking it wasn't going to happen anytime soon, so we took the ntnp approach! my period was late so I knew deep down I was pregnant but didn't believe it cause I thought it wasn't going to happen if that makes sense? So I took the test and I was shaking because I was so happy ! I sent OH a picture of the test saying 'you're going to be a daddy' he text back saying 'really ???' I'd been telling him for days I thought I was pregnant but he didn't believe me ! so yeah we were both happy and cried when we saw each other !

 

[HairyPirates]

I'm 17 and will be just turned 18 when I have my baby. I had been with my BF for about 8 months, he died suddenly on 1/3/14 and I found out I was pregnant about a week later. Only way I can describe it is bittersweet, I am very happy and super excited but also saddened to think that he will never meet our child. It has definitely helped me begin to grieve healthily as I know I must remain strong and keep stress levels down as much as I can for baby's sake. I am very happy considering the circumstances, this baby feels like a gift from God as I have lost one person very special to me but will be welcoming another soon.

 

[nic18]

I'm 17 and will be just turned 18 when I have my baby. I had been with my BF for about 8 months, he died suddenly on 1/3/14 and I found out I was pregnant about a week later. Only way I can describe it is bittersweet, I am very happy and super excited but also saddened to think that he will never meet our child. It has definitely helped me begin to grieve healthily as I know I must remain strong and keep stress levels down as much as I can for baby's sake. I am very happy considering the circumstances, this baby feels like a gift from God as I have lost one person very special to me but will be welcoming another soon.

so sorry to hear about your loss

 

[ClairAye]

I'm 17 and will be just turned 18 when I have my baby. I had been with my BF for about 8 months, he died suddenly on 1/3/14 and I found out I was pregnant about a week later. Only way I can describe it is bittersweet, I am very happy and super excited but also saddened to think that he will never meet our child. It has definitely helped me begin to grieve healthily as I know I must remain strong and keep stress levels down as much as I can for baby's sake. I am very happy considering the circumstances, this baby feels like a gift from God as I have lost one person very special to me but will be welcoming another soon.

So sorry for your loss

 

[tickledpinkkk]

I had my first at 17 & I'm 19 now...will be 20 when this baby is born. With my first, I was pretty stressed out the entire time. I was actually more excited at first when it all didn't seem so real, towards the middle and end of pregnancy I was kind of like, "Oh, shit. This is really happening. There's a baby inside of me." But the day baby was born was the happiest day of my life and he's been nothing but a joy since then.

I think 1st pregnancies, especially unplanned ones, can be a little more overwhelming and confusing because it's new territory for you and you don't know what to expect yet. But I think as things progress and you can feel baby move and find out if it's a he or a she... you'll definitely start to feel excited!

 

[AllDayLong]

Thanks everyone.

HairyPirates - I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't even begin to imagine what that must be like

 

[tinkerbelle93]

It can be difficult to know how to feel at first. I remember how confusing it was because it's hard to get your head round you're going to be a mum but not for another eight months, so it can feel a bit unreal like it's not really going to happen. I felt quite similar really, I think it took the first scan before it sunk in and I felt all the nerves and excitement x

 

[skyesmom]

feeling indifferent is also a part of the shock you are under. it is our brain's mechanism of coping in the emergency conditions - it just shuts you down emotionally so you wouldn't panic out and be able to cope (imagine having a car crash and/or hurting yourself really badly. the whole thing would sink in some hours later when you are safe, physical pain included).

don't think your feelings are anyhow wrong and don't feel bad for not being excited or terrified or anything. as soon as the initial shock is gone, it will all come, both the excitement, the joy, the panic... H&H 9 months to you!

 

[vickyandchick]

I think mine was one of an "oh sh*t!" reaction
OH and I have been together almost 2 years so I don't think we were worried about making it work between the two of us, just the money side of things

I think it sunk in after the first scan, but since then I still feel a little detached sometimes. I know I'm pregnant but it's so overwhelming I just try not to think about it Hoping I feel better once I start getting a bump and feel movements.

 

[MummyToAmberx]

I found out when i was 17 i cried my eyes out at family planning i had gone for more of my pill and only complained of bit of tummy pain. Test there and then bfp, emerancy scan 3 days later expecting to be 6-12wks. I was 19weeks i nearly died!!
I was a mess for a few weeks till i told my family and everything just feel into place and the excitement started. Best thing that ever happened to me x

 

[Mrstruth]

I would like to say Congrats! with my first I felt the exact same way. I never considered my reactions and yet when I found out I was pregnant I was turning 19 and it seemed as if my life was flashing before me. Now I am pregnant again and this is me and DH first kid together, I am excited!! It will grow on you and it is a natural thought

 

[x__amour]

Welcome and congratulations! I'm Shannon, 22, I have a 3 year old named Victoria "Tori" & am 36+1 with #2.

I was 18/19 with my 1st and 21/22 with my 2nd and both were planned.
It was definitely exciting but scary but loving every moment!

 

[BethHx]

I was thrilled with both.
Isabelle wasn't planned but I am 'baby person' and I was so happy. OH was shocked when I told him but was also very happy.

With Eliza (my bump) I was over the moon! We have been ttc since Isabelle was born (18 months) so was starting to give up hope.

It's normal to have mixed emotions xx

 

[MiSS.M0MMY2BE]

I felt excited, but a little scared to tell people.

 

[Selaphyna]

First off, congrats!

I got pregnant with my son at the age of 19, and had him 5 weeks shy of my 20th birthday. His father and I started dating at the beginning of April '02, and found out we were pregnant the beginning of June '02. I was set to leave for Navy basic August '02. I had a lot of friends who were so supportive. I remember being scared to tell my parents, and wanting to tell them in the privacy of our home. The night I told them, we were out to dinner, and they kept talking about me leaving for the Navy and all that, and I just had to blurt it out. Parent's weren't too happy. His parent's weren't happy.

As the months went on both sets of parents came around, and my son is now (even 11 years later) one of the most spoiled kids lol.

For the most part I was nervous and scared, and then also excited. I was "in love" with his father, and planning on marrying him, etc. We broke up when Christian was 13 months old.