How did you tell him?

Discussion in 'Single Parents' started by brownhairedmom, Oct 17, 2008.

  1. brownhairedmom

    brownhairedmom Well-Known Member

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    For those of you who aren't on good terms with your *Designated Sperm Donor*, how did you tell him when the baby was born? I don't have his new address or know which e-mail he uses anymore, and I don't remember his cell number anymore cause I deleted it off my phone. If I message him on facebook he'll be able to get into my account and see my pics and I don't want him at that either. Should I just leave it or e-mail the address he had before?
     
  2. Blob

    Blob Sarah :)

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    Oooh thats kinda hard.. can you not just make sure that he can only see part of your facebook?? I seem to remember that you can do that to certain people?? Sounds to me the best plan sending a message just saying time, date and size and thats it..
    :hugs:
     
  3. Younglutonmum

    Younglutonmum Mummy To Maya & Bump

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    Id just email him

    I texted my sperm doner & got no reply but at least I told him
     
  4. nikky0907

    nikky0907 Well-Known Member

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    So you decided on telling him?
    Personally thats way more than that disgusting scumbag ever deserves!:gun:

    Can you leave a message on his mothers machine?
     
  5. ryder

    ryder Mum to Jasmine & Peyton

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    I just wouldn't tell him lol... He is too problematic...
     
  6. brownhairedmom

    brownhairedmom Well-Known Member

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    I think I'm just going to e-mail the address I have and save it. He won't reply anyway, but at least if he tries to say I didn't tell him about the baby if I decide to take child support down the road, I'll have saved proof that I did.

    There is a method to my madness hah
     
  7. Novbaby08

    Novbaby08 Mom to Harley & Piper

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    tell him.....we have to tell them?! LOL I probably won't his sister will probably tell him. Though surprise surprise it won't make any difference, because what i haven't told them, is he won't be on the birth certificate, and that Harley will have my last name, lol he has done nothing to deserve to pass on a last name or get his name on her birth certificate. He has nothing to offer me either so I have no reason to want to put him down either. He of course doesn't know!
     
  8. charveyron

    charveyron Expecting our 4th-A GIRL!

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    Has he contacted you to see how your getting on or to see if the babies arrived yet? If he didn't give you a forwarding address then thats his problem! it's awkward but if he's made no effort to contact you during the pregnancy then why should you worry about him? x
     
  9. TashaAndBump

    TashaAndBump Guest

    You can message someone on facebook without them being able to see your pictures. If you set all your albums to 'friends only' then he won't be able to see them unless you add him as a friend - You don't need to add someone as a friend to send them a message, just search his name and click "Send message" on the box that comes up.
     
  10. brownhairedmom

    brownhairedmom Well-Known Member

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    I haven't spoken to him since July. If I tell him, its only for legal purposes to cover my ass down the road, as horrible as that sounds.
     
  11. ryder

    ryder Mum to Jasmine & Peyton

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    I agree with Charvyron...

    IMO it is a mistake to tell him... You either want to get child support, or you dont. Its a bitch to try and file for it 5 years down the road. And he can easily turn around and try shit, even if he is an asshole and hasn't been there for you and does stupid things like cheating, you would be surprised at how many people he could potentially get to vouche for his character.

    Especially since later down the road he could have a better set up and life, IE a good job, finished school etc.

    Are you putting him on the birth record?

    Hard situation hun! I hope it works out and he doesn't make your life hell about all this. Can you email his mom and sister and just tell them you don't have any contact for him?

    Save the emails and dates etc.

    Personally if it were me, id be dealing with this now and be making him pay and squeeze everything I could while he was still in a bad place in his life!! lol... but im a bitch that way :rofl:
     
  12. Anne4nra

    Anne4nra TTC -CD1 on 18 Sep

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    My ex (second marriage) found out that he had a two year old daughter while I was deployed (not stressful at all!). Paige is beautiful, but her mother is absolutely hated by his family for waiting and then trying to only take support but not give visitation. I guess she thought the only thing that would change would be the money.

    If you want a chance at a half-way decent relationship during kid-exchange, etc. tell him now, or never. You're not sort-of pregnant and he can't be a sort-of father. -Let him prove he's a complete douche to you and everyone else before you write him off.
     
  13. xJG30

    xJG30 Tom & Mummy <3

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    My mum phoned my ex's mum and told them.
     
  14. Amy-Lea

    Amy-Lea Well-Known Member

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    I text him saying:

    'Hallie, 7lb 13oz, 10:48am, gorgeous'

    My reply?:

    'Don't you mean Hollie?'

    ................


    Hese a bad knob. I said no I mean Hallie and then he ust said I am visiting at 4 and I said well theres only 2 people to a room so you will have to wait around until the people I actually want to see leave.
    Litte did he know I had my 18th borthday party in my room with 13 people haha
     

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