How do i bring up the subject that i need more money from the dad

[babyhopes22]

Can anyone offer me some advice on how i should approach this.
I am struggling more and more for money with sienna growing so fast clothes and food cost...well you know!
Currently i get £50 a month from him to cover food, formula, nappies and clothes. its not nearly enough...he makes out like he cant afford it but his mate lives with him and pays half of everything so i know he cant possibly be as hard up as he makes out. he works full time too!
he thinks he should only pay half for nappies and food and clothes. he doesnt take into account the other costs of careing for a child (the other week i had to put her in babygrows as i ran out of washing powder and couldnt buy any more due to having no money).
The problem is we have an amicable relationship for siennas sake, iv met someone else and so has my ex. i am scared of rocking the boat really but i am desperate for him to pay more. Am i being out of order for wanting more?

 

[sophiew]

Don't be too scared of 'rocking the boat'. How much does your ex earn, do you know?

 

[sophiew]

I see you say he works full time - So i've put £1000 in the CSA calculator as his NET income (after tax). It might be less? I dunno.

Anyway - If he doesn't have your child overnight, and has no other kids to provide for.. then he should be paying you £38 a week.. on £1000 wage.

Obviously this will vary depending on everything. But i'd tell him you need more money, if he gets funny or refuses, say youll go through CSA purely so that you two can't argue about Money and can stay amicable, so it's all out of your hands.

 

[resursval]

I see you say he works full time - So i've put £1000 in the CSA calculator as his NET income (after tax). It might be less? I dunno.

Anyway - If he doesn't have your child overnight, and has no other kids to provide for.. then he should be paying you £38 a week.. on £1000 wage.

Obviously this will vary depending on everything. But i'd tell him you need more money, if he gets funny or refuses, say youll go through CSA purely so that you two can't argue about Money and can stay amicable, so it's all out of your hands.

Do you know how pathetic child support is in Sweden?
The father's only pay about £100 a month even if they have a well-paid job, the mother would have to bring him to court in order to get more money, and who can afford this? And they seldom give the mother right to get more money anyway.
The child support in Sweden is ridiculously low...

And if the dads are low income or on the dole then the government usually steps in and help them.....

 

[babyhopes22]

I see you say he works full time - So i've put £1000 in the CSA calculator as his NET income (after tax). It might be less? I dunno.

Anyway - If he doesn't have your child overnight, and has no other kids to provide for.. then he should be paying you £38 a week.. on £1000 wage.

Obviously this will vary depending on everything. But i'd tell him you need more money, if he gets funny or refuses, say youll go through CSA purely so that you two can't argue about Money and can stay amicable, so it's all out of your hands.

thank you sophiew, yh his wage is about £1000 amonth i reckon after tax. and that is a good idea to say go through csa to stay amicable. its one of those things that i just need to do, thanks for that

 

[Shezza84uk]

Personally I usually tally everything on paper and then ill compare what he gives me to the CSA calculator. I start by saying im aware he has his own life but as we are parents to our child I need to be in the position to make sure she is not in need and I would then add that you cant afford simple stuff such as washing powder.

Write down the total you spend on her each month and divide it by 2 slightly exaggerate it so it means at least £200 pcm let him know as you are amicable and want the best for her you don't want to cause any distress by going to the CSA because you feel as adults you should be able to agree between yourselves so you would like him to reconsider how much he contributes to her care suggest £100 so its 50/50.

Its not like you are making it up £50 is not enough I cant imagine how you stretch £50 I spend that in 1 week on DD fruits and food alone.